Page 19 of Bitten by Bloodmoon (Mateless Shifters #2)

Lumi

“ W e should really get you in the weight room. Twice a day every day. And you could use some conditioning too. Sylara loves to run every morning before the sun rises. You should join her,” Brax says.

I can hear Sylara’s scoff from the side of the room where she’s watching my scrawny, sweaty ass lying on the floor staring up at Brax as I grip my blade like it’s my lifeline.

“It would all be pointless,” Sylara says.

I tend to agree with her. Brax has been going through the basics with me all morning, trying to find any hidden strengths I might have that could be used against a magical creature.

Or even another human. So far, I’m pretty sure I have no strengths.

Brax couldn’t find anything. Emeric couldn’t.

Ambrose couldn’t. There is no hidden talent that is going to give me an edge in a fight.

Nothing that will help me to survive. If it comes down to a one-on-one battle with anyone, I’m dead.

“Not helping, Sylara,” Brax says.

“Just saying you’re wasting your time.” Her voice is sharper than any blade.

I’m still lying on the floor, not bothering to move. Maybe she’ll just kill me now and end all of my misery.

“You could get in the ring with her. See if you discover any strengths I’m missing,” Brax suggests.

“Hell no, Sylara won’t hold back. Lumi will end up hurt, and Nyx will kill you for it,” Riven says.

“Just kill me,” I mutter.

Riven sighs like we’ve been through this a million times. “You don’t mean that.”

I sit up, resting my arms on my knees. “Maybe I do. If I die, whether my real mate is Nyx or Ambrose, one of them would get a new mate. A better mate. A stronger mate. And I would be—”

“Dead,” Nyx says plainly, making me jump. I didn’t realize he’d come downstairs to the basement gym.

I look at him in his cold eyes. “It would end my pain and be better for the world.”

“If you say so, but I suspect it’s just a way to get out of our deal,” he says.

“Out of my head,” I say out loud, not bothering to respond to him when he talks in my head.

“She’s got a point; there is no way she’s fit to survive an attack. What’s the point of keeping her alive if one attack will end her? She can’t possibly be either of your mates,” Sylara says.

“So pragmatic, that’s why you’re my beta. But you’re wrong in this instance, Sylara,” Nyx says.

I study him closely as he glides across the floor. I have no idea why he believes what he does so strongly. But he doesn’t seem to be bothered by my complete lack of fighting skills, or that the others find me completely incapable of improving.

“You’ll get better. But you don’t have to worry about protecting yourself as long as you’re with me. Our deal ensures your survival.”

I look down at the small scar still on my finger where he nicked me so we could make a magical deal together, marked with our blood. Even now, I can still feel the shockwaves from that moment deep within my body, stirring around in my stomach like they have a life of their own.

“Out,” I say again.

“Force me out.”

“Out,” I say.

“Push me out,” he says again.

I sigh. Hating this dance we’ve fallen into. “I can’t just push you out, just like I can’t just become good with a blade in my hand. I’m not a killer.”

He blinks. If there is any sign I hurt him by inferring that he’s a killer, it’s not clear on his face.

“Both are skills. You can learn to become better at both with time and practice.”

“Does it matter if I’ll never be good enough to defend against a vampire? A witch? A shifter? Does it matter if I can learn to block you only for you to blast through my walls when you’re angry enough?”

And then he starts speaking aloud. “Yes, it matters. It all matters. There is a reason you were the one chosen to break the curse. Your strength is your bravery. You faced down a dozen vampires without a drop of fear in you.”

Talonis nods. “You did. I’ve never seen such bravery before.”

“It didn’t do me any good. If they decided to attack me, I’d be dead.”

“But they didn’t attack because you were brave. Because they saw in you what could make you a mate with someone like me. They saw your bravery and chose not to fight you. That’s your strength, but it’s not your only strength.”

I open my mouth to argue when he speaks again.

“You believe the curse can be broken. You believe in mates. In love. In forgiveness. In the kindness of others. You’re willing to do whatever it takes, make any sacrifice necessary, to break the curse for others.

That’s incredibly selfless.” He switches into my head.

“Don’t let one heartbreak take your strength away from you. ”

I look him dead in the eyes. He’s right. I shouldn’t let Ambrose take anything from me, but my heart hurts. It aches for something that never was and never will be again.

“Push me out,” he says in a mental stern whisper.

I grind my teeth, having had enough of his pushing.

He feels cold in my mind, like winter’s breath mixed with a tinge of blood.

It’s nearly impossible to untangle him from my mind and discern where he stands in relation to my own thoughts.

The scent of metallic blood is the easiest clue to find him.

I hunt that thread as hard as I can, finding where he’s clawed into my brain.

“Push me out, snow wolf.”

He’s everywhere. I don’t know how to push every thread out, every drop of him out of my mind.

“If you can push me out, you’ll be able to push him out. Destroy the bond for good if you want.”

He’s trying to taunt me, to motivate me. I don’t know what the others think is happening as we talk to each other in our minds. But none of them speaks.

I still don’t know how to do it when he seems to be everywhere, with so many threads to break or push out.

“Just find one. Just this one,” Nyx whispers.

I follow it, tasting the cool metallic taste on my tongue as I grab onto that thread for dear life, and then instead of pulling on it, I push. Shove. Throw.

Everything is black. I realize in the moment of concentration, I also closed my eyes. I gently open them and stare at Nyx, who is smirking at me in smug satisfaction.

“Well done, love,” he says.

I roll my eyes, hating the nickname he gave me as much as I hate it when he calls me snow wolf.

But I did it. I pushed him out, at least for a moment.

I can still feel his threads, and I know if he wanted to, he could easily wiggle his way back into my mind, but he won’t.

He’ll let me have this win for a second.

My mind drifts over all the little traces of him still there.

As much as I want to find all of them and work on getting those parts of him out as well, my mind is exhausted.

I have no mental energy left to try again.

And then there’s that other thread. The one that smells like evergreens and moonlight and…

I shake my head. I’ll deal with those threads in due course. For now, I did it.

My win is short-lived, though. I start to get a strange tingling in my body. It starts off as soft and then quickly builds until I want to throw up.

Dream, your dream, your dream, your dream…

I don’t know who is speaking the words. It’s not Nyx. It’s not any voice I know at all. The words feel more like a beat in my chest than in my mind at all.

I hold my hand over my mouth to keep from vomiting. “I…uh…dream. I need to tell you about my dream,” I force the words out. As soon as I do, a little of the tingling stops.

Nyx narrows his eyes on me as if realizing what’s happening. Then he looks around the room at the others. I’m unsure whether he prefers I speak with him in front of the others or in a more private setting, but I need him to hurry up before I actually puke.

“You can tell me later, whenever you’re ready,” he says.

I frown. “No, I need…” But all of a sudden, I don’t feel sweaty, my heart isn’t pounding out of my chest, and my stomach has settled.

“It’s the deal we struck. It can have some side effects that are a little too pushy until the magic truly believes you will honor the deal. Since we haven’t really spoken yet, it will be a bit more pushy. My granting you permission to speak to me later should help the symptoms subside for now.”

“What about you? Do you feel this way?”

“Yes.” Which means he has something to tell me, too.

Feeling everyone’s eyes on me, I say, “Let’s get it over with, but I prefer not to have an audience.”

Nyx nods, about to dismiss everyone, when suddenly, he goes still.

“What is it?” Sylara asks Nyx.

“We have an unexpected guest,” Nyx answers, looking at Sylara.

Sylara and Riven vanish. Brax and Talonis move into position on either side of me with Nyx in front, as if they are all willing to put their bodies between me and whatever danger is coming.

Suddenly, the sweat that just vanished is dripping down my neck, and I get the nausea feeling all over again. I stare at the door that leads into the gym, waiting. I’m sure they all know who is coming by now. They can smell them and hear them. But none of them clue me in.

Vampires?

Witches?

Ambrose?

I’m not ready to face him yet. Fuck, why would I rather deal with vampires than Ambrose?

Sylara and Riven appear, gripping the biceps of a male.

My eyes widen as I stare at him. It can’t be. I have to be dreaming.

“Kael?” I ask, not trusting my own eyes.

“Let me go, Sylara. You know I won’t hurt her,” Kael says, annoyed by she’s holding onto him. Riven has already released one of his arms, determining he isn’t a real threat.

“I know no such thing,” she snarks back.

He rolls his eyes, but then turns to me, “Lumi! Are you okay? Are you hurt?”

I grin. It’s been so long since I’ve smiled, genuinely smiled.

The three protective males are still standing in front of me, guarding me like there’s an entire troop of vampires standing in front of me instead of my best friend.

I shove Nyx and run toward Kael, not caring why he’s here, just that he is. I sling my arms around his neck, throwing my entire body into the hug.