Page 42 of Between Regrets and Promises (Between Us Trilogy #2)

I don’t miss the frustrated groan that leaves his lips, and I feel awful that he’s been put on leave.

“I know, it’s weird not running around with my head cut off.

But I think I’m going to visit a grief support group.

Lennon mentioned it and going might help me work through my emotions.

Maybe I’ll be able to heal quicker and can put it all in my past where it belongs. ”

“A grief support group? Like where you talk about missing a loved one?” His tone is edgier than before, and I don’t miss the way his jaw tightens.

“Basically, yeah. Talk about a death that impacted you and how you’re dealing with it,” I try to explain, but when his brows crease, and he tilts his head, I know he’s still confused about why I would go to something like that.

“I’m not grieving him . But I do need to work out how I feel.

I thought I was in love with him. I saw a future with him.

I thought we were planning our forever together—as stupid as it makes me feel now.

When things went from bad to worse, I became a shell of the person I used to be, and I recognized that.

I wanted out. I wanted to leave, but I was scared of what he would do if I did. I feel foolish when I say it aloud?—”

“Soph, no,” Mason interrupts harshly, reaching over to grab my hand.

“You were a victim, and he brainwashed and manipulated you. Don’t continue to give him that power over you.

You have no reason to feel stupid. It’s easy to turn a blind eye to issues when you love someone.

I wish I would’ve done something sooner, but I messed up when I thought keeping you at a distance was best for both of us. ”

“There wasn’t anything you could’ve done, Mason,” I reassure him.

“I didn’t want help. I thought I had it under control.

If I said the right things, did what he asked, didn’t get in his way, didn’t push his buttons.

As long as I didn’t piss him off, I believed he would love me.

I don’t know why or how I became that person.

Looking back now, that woman wasn’t me. I was trapped under his spell, and if it wasn’t for you, I have no doubt he would’ve done something to me.

Something much worse than a black eye and bruised limbs.

Those I can cover up and heal from, but the emotional and mental—the invisible pain—that’s what I need to work through. ”

“I get it,” he says with a small smile. “If you want me to go with you, I will.”

“Thanks, I appreciate it. But this is something I need to do on my own.”

Mason nods and stands. “Well, let’s get your bookcase in here so you can organize all your books because I know you’re dying to,” he tells me with a soft chuckle.

I shrug with a smirk. “Maybe. But how? Should I do by spine color? Genre? Author?”

Mason reaches for me and pulls me out of bed. With his arms wrapped around me, I melt into his hard chest and inhale his fresh just-out-of-the-shower scent. “Oh, sweet Sophie. What am I gonna do with you?”

My insides nearly burst when he calls me that. It brings back every single memory of that night together, and my stomach flutters just thinking about it.

Then he kisses my forehead, letting his lips linger for a moment longer than necessary before he pulls away and leads me out of the room with our hands still joined.

It feels weird being around people grieving those they love and miss. I don’t plan to reveal my whole story or the truth of why I’m here. There’s no easy explanation, and these people are strangers to me, which makes me feel slightly uncomfortable.

The moment I enter, my guard goes up, and I’m not sure I can do this. With my head down, I walk to the snack table and grab a cookie. I realized it’s stale and grab a Styrofoam cup for coffee instead.

“Unless you have a death wish, I wouldn’t drink that,” a deep voice next to me says.

The rasp of it commands my attention, and goose bumps surface across my arms. Rough and low.

A slight accent, I think. The moment I look at him, I realize how much it doesn’t match his physical appearance.

He flashes a warm smile with straight white teeth, and it takes a minute to realize he’s waiting for me to respond.

“Is that so? Think someone poisoned it?” I smirk, putting the cup back to be safe.

He rewards me with a nice-sounding chuckle, his eyes sparkling under the lights. “Might as well be…” Then he leans in close—almost too close. “But I’m pretty sure it’s decade-old instant coffee. The elder church ladies here don’t let anything go to waste.”

“Ah…” I say, putting the pieces together. “So what you’re saying is I should’ve brought my own?” I eye the paper cup in his hand.

He holds it up proudly. “Yep. I got here early and made the mistake of trying it, nearly choking to death. So I made a quick trip across the street to the cafe.”

I smile, the weight of my anxiety slowly releasing from my chest.

“I’m Caleb, by the way,” he says, holding out his free hand. “It’s nice to meet you.”

“Sophie.” I shake it. “You too. Oh, and thanks for the warning. I appreciate it. My roommate usually makes the coffee in the morning, but I was running late.”

“My pleasure.” Caleb’s bright blue eyes meet mine as a wide grin splits his face. “Well, I think we’re about to start, but I’ll give you my number afterward so if you’re running late next time, I’ll grab an extra coffee for you.”

My eyes widen, my insides fluttering with confusion.

“Sorry, that came out a bit too strong, huh?” He frowns, placing a hand over his chest. “I only meant that as a friend. Surprisingly, I’m not very good at socializing.”

“Could’ve fooled me,” I quip. “And no, it’s fine. My guard is a little up.”

“Totally understand.” Caleb flashes another warm smile that has me breathing easier now that I realize he’s not hitting on me.

The minister from the church announces for us to find our seats. The chairs are in a circle, and it seems so formal. I follow Caleb and sit next to him.

A woman sits beside me in the empty chair. “First time?”

I nod. “That obvious?”

She shrugs. “Yeah, but don’t worry. Everyone is very kind and supportive here. They’ve become like my second family.”

“That’s good to know.” I hold my hand out toward her, trying to come out of my shell a little and participate as much as I’m capable of. “I’m Sophie.”

“Dacia.” She takes my hand with an assertive nod. “Nice to meet ya.”

The room goes silent as the minister stands, introduces himself, and welcomes everyone. Pastor Jude is probably in his fifties, soft spoken, and has a kind smile. He mentions how happy he is to see a few new faces, directing his gaze at Caleb and me.

I learn so much in the one-hour discussion.

Dacia lost her twin brother unexpectedly six months ago to a drug overdose and blames herself.

It’s heartbreaking to hear her talk about her grief and the struggle she has accepting she couldn’t help him.

I catch myself tearing up a few times, oddly grateful I’m not suffering in that capacity.

I’ve decided not to share too much and dip my toe in just enough to participate. Mostly because I don’t know how to explain what I’m feeling to strangers, but I also don’t want to get too personal, especially if I don’t plan on returning.

Caleb lost his wife only a few months ago, which makes me feel like scum when I thought he was flirting with me earlier. I can tell he’s distraught over her and talks so warmly about his late wife, Sarah, who tragically died in a car accident.

The others share and talk about their stories too. So many others. Parents. Siblings. Spouses. One woman lost her child only a month ago.

The tears in my eyes aren’t for Weston, though. They’re for everyone here who lost someone they truly loved and cared for, and that brings a whole new perspective to what I’m going through.

I walk out with Caleb and decide to give him my number anyway. It might be nice to have a friend who doesn’t look at me with pity and sadness.

“You remind me of someone,” I tell him once we’ve reached the parking lot. “You must have one of those faces.”

Caleb chuckles, then brushes his hand over his jaw that’s covered with a few days of old stubble. “I’ve heard that a time or two.”

“Well, you do kind of have that tall, dark, and charming vibe so?—”

He arches a brow, and I cringe as soon as the words spew out of my mouth. “Oh my God. That came out all wrong.”

“It’s okay. My wife used to make comments all the time about being the cliché of a romance hero in one of her books. Then she’d say I wasn’t allowed to leave the house looking like one.”

There’s a glimmer of sadness in his eyes as he talks about her, and my heart squeezes at how much pain he must be in.

“I’m so sorry to hear about your wife. I can tell you love her a lot.”

“I won’t lie and say it hasn’t been hard. My friend is the one who told me to come to one of these meetings and give it a try…” He shrugs casually. “So here I am.”

“Yeah, my sister suggested it to me as well. I’m not sure if I’ll come back, though.”

“No?”

My shoulders rise and fall, my mind going through a range of thoughts. “I haven’t decided yet.”

“Fair enough.”

Before I can get into my car, Dacia walks up. “Anyone else drink that coffee in there?”

Caleb and I look at each other and break out into laughter.

“I swear, it was like a million days old! There’s a cafe across the street. Would you guys want to go? Or if you have plans, don’t worry about it.” Dacia glances between us.

She’s in her late twenties or early thirties and has long legs and skinny hips. Honestly, she’s gorgeous with jet black hair and light-colored eyes, and the fact she’s sweet and kind only adds to her appeal.

Before I can respond, Caleb answers. “Sure, I have a few minutes to spare.”

“Yeah, me too,” I reply.