Page 99 of Barging In
“Not even for what you just did?”
“Am I proud for ending my marriage?” Victoria questioned firmly.
“No.” Clem fell back against her chair, letting go of Victoria’s knee. “For setting yourself free.”
“I’m pleased I found the strength to do it,” Victoria admitted. “That I had to do it at all…” She gave another shrug, turning her head away. “Is that something to be proud of, a failed marriage?”
“Was it your failure?”
“Yes,” she said simply. “I should have spoken up. I should have aired my complaints rather than swallowing them down. I had a voice, but I was too scared to use it. Too afraid to say how I was feeling. Instead, I left and hid away here, where life hurt a little less.”
“Being afraid to speak isn’t failure; it’s a trauma response. It’s not all on you. If someone has lived in an environment where they don’t feel their opinion is of any value, they learn to stay quiet.”
Victoria let out a soft sigh.
“Can I ask how Drew took it? And… what about the wharf?”
“He fought it,” she said. “Suggested we start again; sell up here and I move back to London.”
“What? Why?” Clem asked, her heart lurching. Had she misjudged everything? That made no sense. Unless?—
Victoria gave her a knowing look. “You were right. He was terrified I’d take half of everything,” she said with a faint smile. “He was more afraid than I was.”
“Oh,” Clem sighed with greater relief.
“So, he was more than happy to give me the small amount I asked for. Even tried to shake hands on it like it was a business deal.”
“Arsehole.”
“That he is,” Victoria chuckled.
“Will you get to keep the house and the wharf?” Clem asked, needing a bit more clarification.
“Yes. The house, he said, is simpler to transfer, but the wharf is more complicated as technically his business owns it. I told him to make it work, or I’d come for everything he owed me.”
Clem gave her an admiring smile. “I knew you could do it.”
Victoria raised an eyebrow. “You did?”
“I trusted you’d make the right decision. You’re no fool, Victoria. Your passion brought you here, and your determination made the wharf come alive again. You just needed a little push — or maybe a pull — to realise you didn’t need Drew and that when you speak up for what you want, you can get it. Fear makes us irrational.”
Victoria nodded, gazing out over the water. “It does, and I was full of it. Now I feel like a weight has lifted off me. I feel lighter. Ready to face the future, whatever it might bring. I only hope that it’s a little gentler with me.”
“Can I…” Clem hesitated, her heart thudding again. She was desperate to know what all this meant — for her, for them — but the fear of the answer caught in her throat. She took a breath, reminding herself of what she’d said to Victoria: to speak up for what you want.
“What?” Victoria asked, her hand now resting gently on Clem’s leg, setting her alight. She patted it, urging her on, but it made her lose her words even more.
“I…” she faltered, struggling to articulate everything she wanted to say. “Us,” she finally managed. “Might there be an ‘us’? We might have only known each other for a few weeks, but it feels like much longer. I really like you, Victoria.”
Victoria nodded slowly, giving one last pat to Clem’s leg before removing her hand.
“I really like you, too, and I feel the same, but I need a bit of time to be me. Work out who I am. I can’t make any promises right now, but I hope you’ll stick around whilst I work it all out.”
Clem’s chest tightened. Was she saying not now? Or not ever?
As though sensing her doubt, Victoria added, “Whatever the future holds, I know I want you to be part of it. A big part. You could even say a main character. But I’m not ready yet. You were right when you said I’m grieving for the relationship I once had. I only ask for a little time to pack it away.”
Clem exhaled with relief, a slow smile growing. “I can wait as long as you need. There’s no rush. I’ll be here.” She paused, then added with a grin, “In the meantime, does that job offer still stand?”
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