Page 30 of Barging In

Clem leaned back, shaking her head. “No, it’s not.

People can live on opposite sides of the world and still keep it in their pants if they want to.

I get polyamory and open marriages where everyone is on the same page, but this sounds like an excuse for him to sleep with his secretary.

Especially if you’re not really on board with it, which I can tell you’re not. ”

Victoria gave a nonchalant shrug and took a slow sip from her glass.

“Why did you even agree?” Clem asked quietly.

Setting her glass down, Victoria leaned back in her chair and let out a long breath.

“I knew what he wanted… her. I didn’t want her to be me, to take my place.

I’m happy here. I love my house; I love the wharf.

They are me, my visions, my creations. I don’t want to lose them.

It’s a small price to pay to keep what means so much to me.

If I can keep the wharf open, of course. ”

“Would he really close it?”

“I don’t know. Selling up assets here would mean me living back with him, and I’m sure I would cramp his style.

But it’s not something I want to test. I want the wharf to succeed, to give it a new lease of life, so I can educate and feed people.

What else have I got?” She paused, then added softly, “With him, I have everything I need.”

Clem hesitated before asking, “What about love?”

“Love is overrated. It’s a young person’s game. They’re the only ones naive enough to believe in it. Sometimes convenience has to come first.”

Seriously? Victoria had given up on love.

Clem didn’t even know how to respond to that.

Victoria deserved to be fulfilled in every way.

Damn it, Clem wanted to be the one to fulfil her.

The thought made her insides ache. That arsehole treated her like shit, but she was still his, and she was loyal to him.

Pain radiated from her clenched fists. She loosened them and took a quiet, deep breath.

“How long have you been together?”

“Fifteen years, married for almost twelve. We met when I was assigned to design his house in Primrose Hill, and later it became my home.” Victoria fell into silence for a moment, then took a sip of wine and continued.

“Historic architecture is my speciality, and Drew had plenty of other historic projects lined up around London, so they all came my way. I’ve worked on old police stations, train depots, chocolate factories, print works — you name it. ”

Clem’s lips tightened into a smile at Victoria’s sudden enthusiasm. It suited her.

“Impressive. Sounds like you were too busy to have kids. Probably a good thing, considering?—”

“Drew is infertile.”

“Shit. I’m sorry.” Fuck!

Victoria gently shook her head. “You weren’t to know. It broke him, and it became all about him . No one stopped to think how it impacted me. His family, I mean. No one ever asked me how I felt. It was all, ‘Oh, you can’t have kids. Poor Drew.’”

Clem’s voice softened. “I guess, to them, you could still have kids.”

“I could. But I couldn’t. And I think he decided if he couldn’t have a family, he was going to live young, free?— ”

“—and single?”

Victoria nodded, her eyes distant. “Looking back, yes. Over the last few years, I’ve felt like a bystander in our marriage.

He went through a midlife crisis: sold the house I loved in a quiet, leafy area and moved us to a ghastly penthouse in Canary Wharf.

He threw himself into work, and the business became more successful, taking up more of his time.

Sports cars were being bought at a time when I’d hoped for pushchairs.

” Her voice cracked. “I stood on the sidelines, watching the life I’d dreamed of slip away. ”

“I’m sorry. That must have been…” Clem trailed off, unable to even find the right word to sum up how she must have felt.

Victoria shrugged. “I can’t change anything now. It wasn’t even his fault, but I would’ve liked a little consideration — you know, some understanding of how it might have affected me too. Especially from my in-laws.”

Clem reached out and gently squeezed her arm.

“Did you consider adopting?”

“I wanted to, but he was having none of it. He wanted an heir, and he didn’t see someone else’s child as his heir.” She paused for a moment. “And the more I couldn’t have kids, the more I wanted them.”

Clem nodded. “Makes sense.”

“I distracted myself with my family history instead. My future might not have been working out as I had planned, but understanding my past grounded me somehow. It helped me come to terms with the fact I wouldn’t be passing any part of me into the future.”

Ouch. That hit home.

Victoria touched her face, but Clem saw it was a quick wipe of a tear. Without thinking, Clem squeezed her arm again, suddenly aware she hadn’t let go .

With a sniff, Victoria looked up at the wharf.

“Then I found this place. It was an escape from London — the memories, the hope I had there, the dreams… Drew.” She twitched her shoulders.

“Maybe I checked out first, made him look elsewhere.It was a time we should have been pulling together, but all we did was allow it to tear us apart.”

Victoria wiped her face, this time not bothering to hide the tears. Clem fished a tissue from her pocket and passed it to her.

“Thanks.”

“You should be proud of yourself.”

Victoria sniffed from behind the tissue as she wiped her eyes. “Why?”

“Look up.”

Lowering the tissue, Victoria followed Clem’s gaze up to the wharf, where some of the apartment windows were illuminated.

“You did that. You lit it back up and gave it a new life. You made that happen — it was all you. And you will make a success of it. I’m sure if you put your full attention to it, you can make it thrive.”

A smile flickered at Victoria’s lips.

“Your parents must have been proud.”

The exasperated sigh that followed told Clem that she might have put her foot in it again.

“They’ve never visited,” Victoria answered softly, her fingers twisting the tissue in her hand.

“Not once?”

Victoria shook her head, slipping the tissue into her pocket.

“This is my father’s legacy right here, and it did spark their interest when I first told them about it.

That was until they realised it was Drew buying it and I wasn’t leaving him.

Then it was radio silence. They never liked him.

Mum said he had a wandering eye and that he would stray — and she was right, wasn’t she? ”

“Seems so.”

She let out a faint breath. “They wanted grandchildren so desperately. My brother’s a confirmed bachelor, so it all fell on me.

And when Drew and I couldn’t have a child, well, they told me to leave him.

Infertility is no reason to abandon a marriage, is it?

And I wanted to make it work; I really did.

But I didn’t know how it would change him. ”

“You couldn’t have known,” Clem said gently. “Have you spoken to them recently?”

Victoria closed her eyes and shook her head. “They don’t seem to like the choices I make, so I gave up trying. I can only imagine what they would say about me giving up architecture. That was something they were proud of — probably the last thing, actually.”

“I get that. My mum is always questioning my decisions, but wanting to prove your parents wrong isn’t a good reason to stay in a bad relationship.

” Clem bit her lip, not realising what she’d said until it was out.

She knew things were more complicated than that.

When there were no reprisals from Victoria, she quietly added, “So, when did you last speak to them?”

“About five years ago. I sent them an invitation to the opening of the wharf last year out of reluctant politeness, but they didn’t come. We exchange birthday and Christmas cards, but that’s it.”

“So they’ve never seen what you’ve achieved here? What you’ve created?”

Victoria shook her head. “No. And everything I did here was for me; it was about me. But, yet again, it all came back to Drew.”

The injustice made Clem’s jaw clench .

“Have you never thought about divorcing Drew?” she asked cautiously.

“Of course I have,” Victoria said, her voice tightening, “but I’m not risking the house or the wharf. They’re all I have left now.”

“Have you tried talking to him? Expressed your concerns?”

“No.”

“Things might not be as bad as you expect. He can't leave you with nothing.”

“I know that, but I will lose control of what happens next if I do. He could sell the house and the wharf just to spite me. I don’t trust him to act reasonably, and I’ve already lost too much.

” Victoria fidgeted in her seat and then continued, a little more sharply this time.

“Everything needs to stay exactly as it is.”

“With him cheating on you behind your back,” Clem muttered.

Victoria’s jaw tightened, and she snapped, “It’s not behind my back.”

Clem jumped out of her seat and pressed her palms into the side of her head “Argh! That doesn’t make it any better, Victoria. It only makes it worse.”

Victoria turned her head away, voice sharp with frustration. “You don’t understand. It’s complicated.”

Itching with irritation she didn’t want Victoria to see, Clem climbed onto the gunwale and jumped onto the towpath. Her chest tightened, breaths coming fast and shallow as she paced along the length of Florence.

“Clem, please come back,” Victoria called out.

The soft plea stopped her. She paused, took a deep breath, and slowly turned back.

“These are my issues, not yours. Why are you so angry?” Victoria asked, her brow furrowing tightly .

“Why aren’t you?” Clem pushed, breathless as she climbed back on board and sank onto her seat. “He treats you like shit, and you let him get away with it. You deserve better. You deserve to be happy.”

Victoria rested her hand on Clem’s leg. The warmth radiated through Clem’s tense muscles, easing some of the tightness in her chest.

“I am happy,” Victoria muttered.

“Bullshit,” Clem shot back.