Page 3 of Apricity (Devil Dogs of the Apocalypse)

Cole

This should be interesting…

I’ve been curiously waiting for this day to come upon us ever since we all officially started our relationships with Aly.

While Hawk, Jax and I have been close friends for years and could probably list off anything a person could possibly want to know about each of us, the one area we’re most definitely blind in is this.

Kink territory.

From what I’ve seen these past few months, we each have our own specific tastes in the bedroom, which is exactly the reason why it’s important we do the talk together now , before we try anything more than what we already have.

I’m not sure how she was before the world ended but since we brought her to the house, and she became more than just a rescue mission, Aly has been extremely open.

At least where I’ve been involved. Nervous?

Sure. Lacking confidence? Of course. But she’s always been mentally and physically available for me to push her boundaries just passed her comfort zone.

I will admit, I’m dying to introduce Aly, and maybe even the guys if they’re up for it, to a few of the ideas floating around in my head. They are far from vanilla though, and I need to know where they each stand, as far as hard and soft limits go, before I even attempt to voice them.

Looking at Hawk, Jax and Aly, I can tell they’re equally skeptical and curious, possibly timid, about airing their dirty laundry, but it’s us.

We’re a family. If we can’t voice our deepest, darkest fantasies amongst the four of us, where there is absolutely no judgement at all, then where can we?

Deciding to get things rolling and show them what I’m looking for and how it's done, I begin with mine.

“Actually, tell you what, we can start off with my list of hard and soft limits. That way you guys can get the gist of what I mean. Sound good?”

They each look to one another before turning back to me, nodding in reserved excitement. She tries to hide it, but I can see Aly’s toes curling in anticipation. I smile at her enthusiasm before taking a deep breath, preparing for their reactions to my guidelines.

They’re about to see me in a whole new light and they don’t even know it. Ah well, best to rip the band-aid off.

“Alright, let me start by asking if anyone has ever encountered a BDSM or alternative lifestyle before?” They shake their heads in response so I continue. “Ok. No worries. That’s actually good because it gives us a baseline to look to. So, to begin—”

I spot Hawk in the corner of my eye scooting closer and closer before ultimately sitting crisscross apple sauce right in front of me, his big blue eyes looking mesmerized as his mouth falls open and his head falls back slightly. He looks like a fucking deranged toddler joining circle time.

“What the fuck are you doing?” I ask, stopping my kink lesson in its tracks to deal with whatever nonsense he’s pulling now.

“I feel like Van Halen should be playing in the background…”

“What?” “You know… cause we’re gonna be all Hot for Teacher with you teaching us about kinky sex and shit.” His smile grows to cover half his fucking face before I take my pen and throw it at him.

“Fuck off, dick! Now go on and fetch my pen. Bring it back to me like the good fucking student I know you can be and pay attention!” He turns around and crawls on his hands and knees to retrieve the pen before crawling back, returning it to my outstretched hand before retaking his original spot on the floor.

“That’s more like it.”

“Yes, sir.”

My eyebrows shoot up as I point the pen in his direction. “That. That right there is why we need to set limitations. What that means to him might mean something completely different to any of us when it comes to play time. But enough pussy footing around –”

“He said pussy footing…”

I can’t help but bite my lip as my eyes find their way to a giggling Aly sitting in between Hawk and Jax. I lift my eyebrow and cock a smirk at her joke before huffing out my own laugh. This is going to take all night at this rate.

“Finished?”

“Yes, sir.”

Oh, fuck me… deep breaths. My eyes roll up as I pinch my fingers to the space in between my eyebrows, praying for patience while mentally spanking Aly. The vision draws a smile to my lips but reminds me to focus. We can get through this. We’re adults, dammit.

“Ok. So, as for me, my hard limits, or things I will absolutely not do, include scat play, gun play, sounding, branding, infantilism, mummification, pony play, necrophilia and lust murder, or erotophonophilia.” I list them off quickly, confident in what I absolutely will not do at any time in the foreseeable future.

But just in case… “There’re probably more but the list I provided should be sufficient for now, though. ”

“Um… question?” Aly lifts her hand as I finish.

“Of course, ask away. I’m an open book,” I respond and I am.

If there’s one thing we need to be open and honest about, it’s this.

People can get hurt if they diminish a limit or treat it as something that’s not important when in reality it can be a trigger.

I’ll answer whatever any of them might ask because I want them to be just as comfortable talking about their limits when it comes to it.

She looks around, seemingly out of her element before she shakes her head and continues with her question.

“Um… what the fuck is all that? I mean, I know about gun play. I read it in one of Jax’s books a while back—”

“Yeah, and it’s absolutely unrealistic, baby.

You’ve seen our guns. They each have sights at the end of the barrel.

” Jax points to himself before pointing to each of us in our little circle.

“I know and you know and you know and yes, Hawk, even you know, that shit would hurt if you put it in a fucking vagina. It would tear that pussy up and not in a good way.” He’s not wrong.

I remember reading scenes with exactly that in it and thinking the same thing. But…

“I mean, the gun could always have a silencer on it or be used for more than just penetration but I get what you’re saying, Jax. As for what everything else was, scat play is, well, have you ever seen two girls one cup?”

“No… but I’ve heard of it and yeah, no.” She shakes her head.

“Count me out on that too. No thank you. I feel like there’s a whole mess of bacteria and infections that can result from that and yeah…

no. I’m good.” Aly scrunches her nose as Hawk and Jax agree, so I mark the information on each of their pages.

“Alright, then there was sounding, which is the dilation of the urethra using special rods.” Both Hawk and Jax automatically grab their junk and cringe at the definition as if I just threatened them with castration.

“Yup,” Hawk squeaks out, pointing aggressively to the papers on the floor. “Put that shit on their too.” Jax nods just as vigorously in agreement.

Aww, look at us, making all kinds of progress already.

“I’m sure you already know what the rest are, right?”

“Well, yeah, I guess so… but do people really practice mummification as a way to get off?”

“Anything’s possible and, besides, I don’t kink shame so, if a person likes it and their partner consents to it, have at it. Not my place to judge. But it is my place to set my own boundaries and respect those of the people I’m with.”

Satisfied with my explanations, everyone agrees that the hard limits I’ve set for myself can be attributed to each of them as well, happy to not be branded, willingly or not.

“As for soft limits, I’m up for trying pretty much everything else I didn’t already mention.

” Taking a deep breath, I prepare myself to reveal something I've kept even more hidden, deep within the recesses of my past. Something none of them really have any idea about. They may have had a hunch from what we’ve done together with Aly, but I’ve never given full confirmation.

“For the sake of transparency, I have been in BDSM relationships in the past. While I’m naturally dominant and enjoy the responsibility that comes with it, I have experienced both sides of the coin in that respect. So, if you have any questions about any of it, feel free to ask .

"Also, don’t automatically think that means I like to dole out pain. Quite the contrary, in fact. From my own experience, my methods of teaching or correction can be rather enjoyable.”

I pause at that little bombshell and let them absorb the information.

People that are new to the lifestyle can often times place stereotypes where they shouldn’t be.

While some in a dominant position enjoy enacting pain on their subs, I like to offer pleasure.

I’m not a sadist by any means, but as soon as someone hears the letters B.D.S.M.

, they immediately go to whips and chains, bruises and pain. That’s not always the case.

“Don’t worry, though, I won’t go there with any of you unless you wish to do so with me. I just wanted to let you know, anything’s fair game, and if I can be open and reveal something like this without fear of repercussions, you should each feel free to do so, as well.”

Aly shifts on the floor, pursing her lips. I can see the question there right along with her reluctance to ask it. “Go ahead and ask, beautiful. Your questions can’t possibly scare me,” I say. She nods in return, coming to terms with herself at my encouragement.

“Can a person, or rather… can I, possibly, have like a tester session or, I don’t know, a training session? Is that a thing? You know to see what I’m getting into before we do it on the regular?” Aly asks.

“Of course, nothing is ever set in stone. People are allowed to change and the guidelines we’re setting up today and in the future are allowed to change, as well,” I reply, attempting to reassure them.

Aly nods in understanding. Although she doesn’t say anything more on the subject, she does seem intrigued and curious about the topics being discussed. Lucky for her and for the rest of us, I have no problem taking baby steps.

“Like I said, there might be some stuff that I haven't tried yet, maybe things I'm not even aware of, and if we come to that cross-road, we’ll deal with it then. And remember, all of these limits can be amended or added to at any time. Open and honest, remember?” I continue.

They each nod at that but Aly scrunches her nose again. She’s more hesitant this time, her eyes widening as if she just realized something important. It nabs my attention and brings my curiosity to the forefront.

“What’s up, beautiful?”

“You didn’t say anything about limiting activities to just you and me.

” She bites her lip, taking a second. “What if… what if I was interested in seeing something that involved you...,” She tilts her head in emphasis, “on a more intimate basis, with like…” then waves her hand around the group, pausing on Hawk and Jax, without finishing her thought out loud.

Oooh, she is a clever girl.

“You’re absolutely right. I didn’t mention any limit to that effect.”

I’ve tried a lot in my years as an adult. Some of which might shock them to learn about me. But that’s a discussion for another day. This conversation is already like walking on a tight rope. We don’t need anyone to fall off due to information overload.

Her eyes widen as she jerks her head back, surprised and maybe even confused at my response. I can see her head filling with even more questions right before my eyes but before she gets too carried away with that little nugget of valuable information, I continue.

“I know this is a lot to take in but I believe it’s proactive of us to consider being direct and truthful while also providing each other this information judgement free.

We’re all fucking together with Aly. I mean that sentence in both of the ways it can be perceived because it’s correct either way.

” I focus on each of their overwhelmed faces.

Their reactions are understandable and expected.

Especially when you take into consideration the turn the day just took into crazy town, as well as that little bomb I just planted in their heads.

Time to adjust. “Tell you what, take a day or two and think about what you might want to try, what you’re curious about, anything you might want to bring up and we’ll regroup on this particular topic in a few days.

How’s that sound?” After looking at each other, and then to me, they all agree, and I can just about see the weight being catapulted off of their shoulders.

“Alright, enough of the heavy." I point a finger in Jax’s direction as I stand and take three steps to where the kitchenette is. "Whaddya need help with? I’d say it’s about time to rustle up some grub, how ‘bout you?”He points back enthusiastically as he moves to join me by the stove, probably thankful that conversation is done and over with. At least for now.

They might think they know themselves, but they have no idea. They’re about to be more self-aware than they’ve ever been in their lives.