Page 11 of Apricity (Devil Dogs of the Apocalypse)

Alessandra

“Have you ever used a bow before?” Jax asks as we make our way deeper into the woods behind the cabin. We spent yesterday planning in response to Jax’s delegation. After only being here for a few weeks, we have a lot to do to get this place up to snuff.

He's obviously never played whack-a-mole …

“I used one a long time ago. Not to hunt with but, you know, like on an archery range. Probably like riding a bike, right?” I say in response to the bow question.

“Eh, something like that. Stick with the AR, it’s probably best we have both just in case we run into something bigger than a deer.” He lifts me up and over a large fallen tree before hopping over it like it’s a stick on the ground. My steps faulter as I take in his words.

“Wait… bigger than a deer? Like what?”

“Well, you know there’re bears down here, but there’re also panthers.”

“Panthers?!”

“Yeah, cougars, mountain lions, they’re all pretty much the same, only here they’re called panthers.”

I frown and tilt my head to the side in thought.

“Well, shit. Knowing me, I’d still probably think it’s cute and want to pet it. Adopt it as a guard kitty. Survival instincts through the roof in this biotch!”

“No… if we find one, you can’t keep it,” Jax not so helpfully supplies my inner monologue, who decided now’s a good time to use her outside voice.

Skank…

“Hoe…”

“Focus, Aly…”

I shake my head and do as Jax asks, focusing on the path in front of us, lest I trip over myself again.

Grace was something I wasn’t born with and will probably never learn, so it’s the least I can do to look at the damn pathway in front of my toes instead of daydreaming about being a kitty cat commander before I—

“Fu— ”

“Gotcha, you’re ok.” Jax grabs for my elbow before I faceplant the muddy ground. He hauls my clumsy ass back up to its proper height and continues walking as if nothing even happened. Like he knew I was going to trip and he was just waiting for it to come to pass.

Am I that predictable?

Any who. Back to walking to who-the-fuck-knows-where.

*Grunt… groan…crack! *

The snap of a twig amongst the strange echoes through the woods draws my attention, and that of Hawk, Cole and Jax, to a lone lurker as it closes in on us. The stare in its eyes is focused solely on that which gives it purpose.

Flesh.

I'm sure if we were on the road and not in the middle of the woods, the walking corpse would be much faster. Lucky for us, we're in the better of the two locations. It creeps closer and closer, stumbling over fallen tree limbs, stumps, rocks and debris to get to us. A single thought in its infected mind- to devour. By the rate of decay, I’d say this one’s been around a while.

It’s missing an arm and half its face has been eaten away, the sinewy innards visible even from this distance.

“Got it,” Hawk volunteers before runnng over to it with Cole backing him up.

Closing the distance quickly, he pulls out his Kabar knife from the strap on his leg and stabs the thing through the fleshy part under its jaw, right up into its brain, killing it instantly.

Its body falls to the ground in a thudding lump, breaking apart into meaty chunks on impact.

Without a care in the world, Hawk bends down to pull his knife out of the body and wipes it on his pant leg before returning with Cole to us.

It's strange, even after all these months: the fact that we’re so nonchalantly killing a thing that used to be a living, breathing person.

But that’s all we can think of them now.

Things. Monsters. The souls that used to inhabit the infected bodies are gone, leaving a shell of themselves behind to purge the land of everything and anything still living.

But that’s our reality now. Fiction be damned.

And we survivors simply move on, leaving the departed where they fall.

We’re not that far away from the cabin, able to see it still if I simply turn around and peer through the trees and underbrush, when Jax sets his bow down on the ground next to a large tree.

I don’t see the metal ladder attached to said tree until Jax starts climbing up the side of it, waving his hand instructing me to follow.

I give him the worst case of bombastic side-eye known to man.

Yeah, cause damp metal ladder rungs and a clumsy chick make a great combination.

Against my better judgement, I put one hand over the other and start to climb but it’s slow going as I try my very best not to fall off the damn thing. He might think it’s as safe as a pillow fort, but even I know those bitches can suffocate you.

“Come on, baby, get that cute butt up here,” Jax calls down playfully, already seated safely at the top.

Lifting my gaze away from the ladder, I stick my tongue out at him and shake my ass, trying to downplay my lack of progress as well as showing off just how cute I think my butt is. Of course, it’s just my luck that my sarcastic gesture is precisely the thing that causes my foot to slip.

Yup… I am that predictable.

“Holy fuck balls!” My hands strangle the metal rung in a death grip as my one leg dangles in the air. Not wasting any time, I force my foot to cooperate and find the ladder again before taking a deep breath, trying to calm my nerves.

Shaking my head to myself, I push on and make it up to the top of the very steep, very high ladder at the middle of the very tall tree… Without any thought behind the movement, I look down and it’s not until that very moment, I’m hit with an undeniable fact…

I’m terrified of heights.

Fuck.

Too petrified to move from the ladder into the dual seat at the top, I freeze. But that’s fine. It’s all fine. Yup, I am A.O.K staying right here. Clinging to the wet, slippery metal for hours is totally doable. I’ve got this. It’ll be fine.

I don’t realize I’ve closed my eyes until a sharp squeak of metal sounds, followed by the feeling of Jax heave-hoeing my ass up onto the bench by the nape of my jacket.

“It’s ok, baby, I’ve got you. You’re safe. See… look.” I peek open my eyes just as he pulls down a railing from over our heads, securing us in. It almost looks like those things they have on Ferris wheels to keep people from falling out.

Fuck I’m afraid of Ferris wheels too…

Holy shit I’m dizzy…

How in the hell did I make it down from the second floor of the estate during the raid?

It makes no sense. I must have been so keyed up in survival mode, it didn’t matter how far my descent down the trellis was.

I knew I needed to do it, so I did. But this?

I don’t need to do this. I need to survive. On the ground. Where it’s fucking safe.

“Breathe, Aly.” *click* “You’re good, I’ve just fastened the safety harness. You’re not going anywhere.”

He doesn’t know that. This whole rickety contraption could fall out of the sky at any moment.

How old is this thing anyways? Definitely not OSHA compliant if I have anything to say about it.

The fact that I’m lacking certification on any OSHA standards is beside the point.

What do I look like? A fluffy squirrel? I’m not a damn tree rodent!

People were not meant to be this high up from the ground!

“Look, Aly. Open your eyes and look. You don’t want to miss this view.”

I shake my head in vehement opposition. Nope. “ You look. You can hunt and kill everything you want. I’m going to sit here, with my eyes closed and imagine I’m on the beach. Surrounded by booze and dancing starfishies. Oh look, it’s a dolphin bringing me a Mai Tai. How nice!”

* creak*

“Oh, my sweet baby Jesus!” My arms flail out to my sides, reaching for anything to grab and hold onto for dear life.

“Shhhhhh. Aly, open your eyes for me, baby. Please. Trust me. I set this stand up myself. It’s secure. It’s not going anywhere and neither are you. Please, just open your eyes. I promise the view will be worth it.”

I feel the calloused skin of his fingers on my clenched hands a second later, rubbing across my whitened knuckles.

His breath ghosts across my cheek and neck a moment before he plants a gentle kiss just below my ear.

“Open your eyes, baby,” he whispers and against all my willpower not to do so, my eyes open of their own accord.

“What the fuck?!” I gasp before I break out into a full-bodied laugh, forgetting the terrifying height and everything else besides what I see.

There, on another tree across the way, are Cole and Hawk. Their arms are up above their heads while their pants are down around their ankles. Their dicks fully out in all their glory, swinging around as if they were helicopter blades.

I shake my head at them but keep laughing still, even at Jax’s protest to stay quiet.

He can hardly follow his own rule for how much his shoulders are shaking, trying to contain his own amusement.

Before long, both Hawk and Cole pull their pants up and blow me kisses, the rifles in their hands poised at the ready for what we came here to do.

Hunt for our meals.

∞∞∞

Six and a half hours later, we start our trek back.

Empty-handed.

Jax says that’s normal, however, and that it might take a few more days before we see anything come through. According to the guys, the deer stands are located on what look to be active game trails. Well… at least that’s what they all said when they saw the tracks in the mud .

I just saw mud.

I’ve never been hunting. Not a single day in my life.

Have I had the opportunity to do so? Sure.

Have I ever wanted to? Not once. Should I have?

Maybe. I don’t know. Looking back now, it’s a skill I probably should have invested at least some time in, learning how to track or bait or something.

I know how to fish, so at least there’s that.

But it’s nothing but a bunch of rotten luck since we have no rods here and all the ones we used to have are probably char-broiled at the estate.

I could resort to living off veggies but knowing me I’d eat the wrong berries and die of cardiac arrest or dysentery or some other such shit. Get taken out Oregon Trail style.

“We should set some snares closer to the lake. Try for some rabbit or squirrel. Maybe dig a few pitfalls, too. They could serve a dual purpose: might help catch a deer or a bear while simultaneously protecting us against a horde. They won’t notice the trap and will fall right in.

As it stands, we have no perimeter fencing here so any little bit could help if it comes to it. ”

The guys nod back at his suggestions while I take in Jax, fully in his element.

He’s a leader. He needs stability. Regiment.

Control of the things outside to be in control of himself.

Regardless of the fact that we didn’t get any meat today, I see his shoulders relax, just a little, and the strain in his eyes eases as he doles out orders to Hawk and Cole.

They run back to the cabin, tasked with retrieving the tools and equipment needed for the jobs we need to finish before nightfall, while Jax pulls me into his hard chest, his hands bracketing my face as he looks deep into my soul.

“You did good today, baby. ”

“How? By not falling out of a tree and killing myself in the process? Yay, me….” My eyes drift down to the ground, frustrated with my lack of ability to provide any sort of… well anything to our little group apart from being a liability. Jax tilts my face back up to meet his inquisitive stare.

“You fought through your fears. I didn’t know you were afraid of heights or else I probably would have just stayed on the ground with you.

But, even still, you pushed yourself up those rungs, regardless of how terrified you seemed to be.

You forced yourself to overcome your fears to be better.

You should be proud of yourself. I know I am.

And from the looks I saw from Cole and Hawk, they were full of pride as well. ”

I don’t know what to say as tears suddenly fill my eyes.

All I want is to make myself worthy of them.

The guys that took my incapacitated self in during the worst of times and decided to love me for me.

And I, them. The praise I receive from Jax overwhelms me.

And the fact that Cole and Hawk most definitely feel the same way makes my knees week.

Jax sees my faltering legs and wraps his arm around my back, holding us together.

“You did good, baby,” he whispers this time, softly, inches from my lips before he captures them with his, pressing this belief into me as if the movement will solidify the fact in my soul.

Through his sheer willpower or my consuming vulnerability, I feel a break in the dam inside me, flooding my being, at least for the moment, with a sense of belonging and worthiness.