Page 32 of All in for Christmas

Dean whispers, although the kids are out of earshot and most likely soundly sleeping.

“And here’s the one we landed on for Henry.

” He opens the link, and a toy car appears that looks like a blue hot rod with flames painted along the sides.

It’s got a roof and a micro steering wheel and doors that open and close on either side.

It’s made to seat one person of about Henry’s size and is propelled forward by the child’s feet.

I chuckle imagining Henry inside of it. “Watch out for our mini speed demon.”

Dean laughs. “I know! Christmas morning’s going to be fun.”

“Where will they ride?”

“I’ll be sure to clear the snow in the driveway. At least enough of a path for them to go back and forth.” He’s such a good dad.

“I found a few stocking stuffers at the market,” I volunteer. “Some cute puppets and candies.”

“Perfect,” he says and holds my hand. “It’s not like they won’t have enough. Our Christmas tree is loaded with packages from my parents and your mom. And I’ve got something special for you.”

If only I had more to give him. “You didn’t have to.” I blush. “I mean, maybe we should just let the cell phone be my gift?”

“Too late,” he says and shakes his head. “Already bought it.”

“Can’t wait to see.”

“You’ll just have to sit tight for one more night.”

“Oh!” Wait. “On Christmas Eve?”

He grins happily. “I liked our idea to exchange our gifts the night before, and make Christmas morning more about Santa and the gifts from our parents.” He shifts in his chair. “You haven’t changed your mind?”

“No, no.” I firmly grip his hand. “I can’t wait for our private gift time.”

He peers out the window to the backyard and glances at the street beyond the kitchen sink. “Maybe I should get a head start on that snow shoveling? Don’t want to leave it all till tomorrow, and my parents aren’t coming over until six.”

“Do you need any help?” I ask, because I’ve got some experience in the shoveling department. I used to shovel our neighbors’ drives as a teen to pick up extra cash.

“The best way you can help is by staying right here and keeping toasty and warm, while also keeping an ear out for the kids. We should probably go ahead and have them bathed and in their pj’s when my folks get here.

Do you mind handling that?” Three days ago I might have been daunted by that prospect, but now I feel like a domestic goddess champ. “No problem,” I say with gusto.

By now, it’s clear I’ve missed my Paws and Read launch party in the other realm, and I’m very bummed to have let all those pups and people down.

But there’s an upside to my new situation.

Mom’s healthy here and has no need for further doctors.

Maybe I’ll come up with a different way to give back if I stay in this world indefinitely.

For the moment, though, I’m just grateful to be here for one more day.

Dean suits up to go outside and I check on the kids, who are still napping.

They dozed right off when we came home from the phone store but never seem to sleep for more than an hour in the early afternoon.

I can’t help feeling excited about my special night out with Dean.

It will be the first date we’ve had in forever.

Longer ago in my mind than in his, obviously.

I head to my closet to check out my wardrobe choices.

There’s a slinky black dress that is strapless.

A cropped black jacket accented with swirly gold stitching hangs beside it.

Now this looks vintage. My pulse quickens.

How lovely! I must have bought it as a splurge one time.

I pull its hanger from the closet and take out the dress, holding both pieces in front of me in the dresser mirror.

The dress’s fabric is super clingy. I could wear tights with it and slingback heels.

I press the fabric to my tummy, which is not exactly flat. There are bound to be bulges.

A light bulb goes on in my brain.

Spanx.

I lay the dress and jacket on the bed and pull open my top dresser drawer.

The Spanx lie there beside some lacy underwear that I’ll of course have to wear! I choose a sexy red thong and a matching push-up bra, my face heating. The old me never would have—no. Stop. I’m this me now. The girl with the lower back tattoo and pink highlights.

I pick up the Spanx, which are disappointingly heavy.

I bet the garment pinches in places, but maybe some pinching will be worth it to see the look on Dean’s face.

I tug at its taut cylindrical shape, wondering how I’m going to insert my midsection into this contraption.

I’m not exactly a small person. On the short side, maybe, but plenty curvy.

It’s got stout legs cut to the midthigh and a bodice that covers the stomach, back, and breasts.

I wouldn’t own the darn thing if I weren’t capable of squeezing into it somehow.

So! I’ll give it the old college try. Ha.

I start to close the drawer—but wait. A tin box with a floral design on top sits below where the pair of Spanx was.

I pick it up and something heavy rattles inside.

Sounds like marbles? Stones? What? I sit down on the bed and pry open the lid.

A wad of cash springs out of the box. Bunches and bunches of lower denomination bills.

There are coins scattered in the bottom of the tin.

I’ve been squirreling money away! I pick up some currency.

Fan it out in my fingers like a deck of cards, and—something drops out from the middle, fluttering to the floor.

I pick it up. It’s a picture of a telescope!

No, wait. An advertisement from a local store.

Second Chances. I gasp and my heartbeats race away from me.

A secret surprise! I’ve been planning to buy this for Dean!

I count the money, wondering if I’ve got enough.

It’s very close. If I made a modest withdrawal from my personal account, I’d have this.

I glance at the clock and it’s nearly three.

The kids will be up at any minute, and I’ll need to get them—and myself—ready for tonight.

Tomorrow, though, I’ll finagle an excuse to run an errand.

Assuming I’m still here, and all indications are that I will be.

A grin tugs at my lips, so huge it hurts.

I can’t wait.

I think of my old life, but it’s getting farther and farther away. Growing fuzzy like a fading dream I’m having trouble recalling. I didn’t plan this. Didn’t intend to be sitting here two days before Christmas in some alternate reality while holding a lap full of cash money and Spanx.

Fear suddenly grips me like an icy glove, latching onto my heart and squeezing harder.

Just as breezily as I was dumped here, I could be yanked the other way.

But I’m not ready to leave.

I press my palms together and beg of the ceiling.

Please, not yet.

I want to be here to see the kids’ happy faces on Christmas morning, and to tell Henry that yes, “Kissmas” is finally here.

I want to buy Dean that telescope and see his dreamy smile light up the room.

I want Mom and Roger to be happy, and for all of us to have a merry Christmas.

And that kind of Christmas can only happen here.