Page 20 of Accidentally Joining His Cult (Chicago Awakenings #1)

CHAPTER TWENTY

Cody

D riving toward the Kyla campus, my leg is bouncing up and down with a mixture of nerves and excitement. Beck is finally here, and even though we talked every day, I’ve missed spending time with him even more than I realized.

I’m not totally sure why I’m so nervous, though. It’s not about being with him in person—I couldn’t stop myself from running into his arms when I saw him. Our physical connection is definitely just as hot as I remembered. I’m honestly regretting that we have so many plans for the day, but Viktor asked me to bring Beck in, and it sounded like a great idea at the time. Now, I wish we’d just stayed home.

Maybe I’m nervous he won’t like Linna as much as I do or that he’ll pick up on some of the less-than-ideal things that I’ve been starting to notice. Thinking about him coming to visit and how things might seem from an outside perspective has me noticing for the first time just how unique our community is. I’m worried that he won’t want to stay for the entire month that we have planned. Or that he won’t want to visit again.

“Here we are, my home away from home,” I announce as we pull onto the campus.

Towering trees line both sides of the drive as we enter a giant roundabout. There’s a large open green space in the center with paths and outdoor tables for people to spend time outside. On our right, we drive past the massive three-story fitness center. Then there’s a strip mall with the coffee shop, a small grocery store, and some doctors’ offices before we pass the emergency medical center.

Finally, we reach the main Kyla offices. It’s the tallest building in Linna, made mostly of glass with huge windows that allow natural light to flood the entire space. Inside, it has offices, event spaces, a quick-service cafeteria, boardrooms, production studios for the Kyla videos—anything a company might need.

I point everything out to Beck, filling him in on details about some of my friends who work in the different spaces, just like I did on our drive this morning. “If we were to keep going, we’d be at the Old Mill, where we’ll eat dinner. Then there’s Village Bank and the childcare center. Viktor wanted to create a campus that rivals the big tech guys and other major companies who’ve revamped their headquarters to improve the work lives of the employees,” I explain.

“Sounds like you’d never have to leave,” Beck comments in a tone I can’t read. He probably wasn’t expecting this since I don’t actually talk about the details of my job with him much.

We’ve spent so much of the last month getting to know each other more, and I’ve loved every moment. Even though we haven’t officially labeled anything, I know that this is the best relationship I’ve ever been in.

I think he’s finally over his concerns about me being so newly aware of my sexuality. The only reason I think we haven’t had the relationship conversation is that neither of us can find a solution to the distance.

I’m not sure what Beck’s thoughts are on the situation because I’m too afraid to ask, but I know the long distance part has sucked. I also know that I’m not ready to give him up.

The more I’ve gotten to know Beck, the more sure I am that our connection goes far beyond physical attraction.

I love how unapologetically himself he is. On the surface, he might seem like a grumpy loner, but once you get to know him, you see the truth—he’s an incredibly loving, fiercely loyal man who’d do anything for the people he cares about. I think he’s just afraid of trusting the wrong people.

I love how funny he is. His dry sense of humor and sarcasm, always delivered with the most serious expression, has me doubled over in laughter almost daily.

I love how thoughtful he is, whether it’s the little gestures when we’re together or how he remembers the smallest details from our texts and calls. He always follows up on things I’ve mentioned or asks me to expand when he can tell I’m excited about something.

I realized it this morning—I love him .

I should have clued in sooner, but considering my track record for being oblivious, I think this was a pretty quick turn-around for me. When I saw him in the airport, something clicked. As I ran toward him, it hit me—I realized that my feelings for Beck are love.

I’ve never been in love before, but this has to be it. No one has ever made me this happy by just existing.

And yet, I have no idea what to do with that information. It feels ridiculous to tell him when I have no solutions for us.

A part of me hoped that maybe Beck would come to visit Linna and fall in love with it like I did all those years ago. But the more I’ve tried to picture Beck here, the less realistic that outcome seems.

I can’t imagine Beck checking in every day with his fitness group chat or sending pictures of the meals he cooks like I do. And I know he wouldn’t work for Kyla. He already has such a great job that makes him happy. There’s no way anything in Linna would be a better fit for him.

I also don’t think Viktor would appreciate his humor as much as I do. No matter how I spin it, I don’t think his life would be better here than in Chicago.

And even though I’ve started to see the cracks in my life here, leaving Linna wouldn’t be easy for me. I’m not even sure it’s an option.

I push those thoughts aside and try to focus on the present as Beck and I pull into the underground parking garage below the tower.

We take the elevator to the lobby, where Viktor asked to meet to give us the tour. This whole situation is unprecedented, usually, you need to be personally invited by Viktor to visit Kyla headquarters. The last visitor I can remember was a European royal who’d participated in some of my California programs three years ago.

Luckily, Viktor’s my friend and he respects my opinion, so asking to bring Beck here was possible.

Viktor likes to give the tours himself so visitors or new members of the community can hear his vision directly from the source. When we exit the elevator, he’s standing near the mountain sculpture in the center of the large atrium, and he greets us with his warm smile.

“Beckett Caldwell, welcome to Kyla headquarters," Viktor says, pulling Beck in for a hug.

“Thanks,” Beck mutters, looking uncomfortable with the embrace. Over Viktor’s shoulder, he’s giving me a wide-eyed what is happening expression that makes me silently chuckle.

“Well, we’re all so pleased to have you staying with us,” Viktor tells him.

“Yeah, I’m really excited to stay with Cody,” Beck says, emphasizing my name for some reason.

“Before we begin the tour, I was hoping to get a few shots here in front of our sculpture with the company name on it,” Viktor gestures toward the mountain. Beck gives a slight nod before following in the direction of a photographer I hadn’t noticed who’d been standing with Viktor.

They take a few photos: Beck and Viktor shaking hands, then a side hug, and another with Viktor’s arm around Beck’s shoulders, which looks a little awkward since Beck is taller than him. Finally, they do one with their hands in front of their chests in the mountain pose used in the Kyla programming. Viktor instructs Beck to straighten his fingers and interlock them to form a triangle—a symbolic “mountain,” with the fingers above the triangle representing the potential peaks yet to be reached in life.

When they finish, Viktor thanks the photographer and asks him to follow our tour to take some candid shots. Beck looks less than thrilled about the idea, but doesn’t say anything against it.

We spend the next hour or so exploring the tower, and then Viktor excuses us for a lunch meeting. He promises that he’ll find us in about thirty minutes to continue the tour of the campus.

Beck and I head to the quick-service cafeteria on the top level with fantastic panoramic views of the city. I love that this view is a public space so everyone can enjoy it.

We make our way through the line, and both end up with grilled lemon chicken and asparagus—one of my favorite options here. After grabbing bottles of water, we head for a private table near a window facing the mountain in the distance.

“Are all of the options always so…” Beck trails off before finishing his question, “healthy?”

I laugh at the twisted expression he’s aiming at his plate.

“Yeah, there’s a huge emphasis on having a healthy mind and body here,” I explain. “Everyone works with a dietitian to establish a personalized health plan and a personal trainer to maintain a fitness regimen.”

He gives me a skeptical look before finally nodding. “I guess free health coaching is a cool perk of working here. I’m surprised everyone wants that, though. I can’t imagine my employees’ reactions if I got rid of the unhealthy options in our cafeteria.” He snorts a laugh at the thought.

“Oh, it’s not free,” I clarify before digging in.

Beck gives me another quizzical expression. “So, it’s optional, right?”

“Well, no. Everyone here is enrolled in the health and wellness program and assigned an accountability group,” I explain. “But it’s not just for employees. Everyone in Linna who participates in Kyla’s programs is enrolled. The cost goes toward paying the nutritionists and the trainers and running the gym and stuff.”

“Wait, your gym membership isn’t free?” He sounds shocked now.

“No?” I answer like it’s a question. “If it were, how would they afford to cover operating costs or pay the employees?”

“My company covers the cost of a gym membership of the employees’ choice as a part of our benefits. They can even choose to put that money toward home gym equipment or streaming memberships that offer workouts,” he says casually, like that's not the coolest thing ever.

“Wait, really? That’s amazing.”

“Yeah, it’s better for health insurance purposes too,” he adds.

“I don’t mind paying for ours,” I clarify. “I love the people I get to work with. You know Nick, he’s my best friend here, but he’s also my trainer. I know the cost ends up supporting him.”

Beck gives me an indulgent smile and nods before he finally starts eating.

“So when do I get to meet Nick?”

“Tomorrow!” I blurt out a little too loudly. “He’s leading a hike in the morning that I already signed us up for. I hope that was okay. I was just so excited about you meeting him that I didn’t think to ask first.” I give him a hopeful look, and he smiles, nodding.

“I’ll do whatever you want, Goldie.”

The nickname makes my cheeks heat as I smile, and I can’t stop myself from rambling on about all the people I’m excited for him to meet and all the fun things he’ll get to experience. The thirty minutes fly by, and we barely finish our meals in time with how much we’re talking.

We meet Viktor back in the lobby, and he continues his tour of the campus, explaining the purpose of each building and how it supports the community.

Beck seems interested in everything and asks polite questions throughout the tour. Viktor and Beck speak in a lot of business terms that kind of go over my head, but I love that they’re connecting. As the tour went on, Beck relaxed, asking me more casual questions and even making plans to visit some of the spaces again.

By the time we wrap up the tour, it’s somehow already almost seven. “See you at dinner.” I wave to Viktor before he heads back into his office. He waves, and I grab Beck's hand to lead him toward the Old Mill.

“Do we finally get to eat?” he asks hopefully.

I laugh before answering. “Yes, I promise I won’t let you starve.”

“I don’t know. I think I’m pretty close to my hunger limit, I can’t be held responsible for my actions if I get much hangrier,” he warns solemnly.

“Well, we’d better hurry then,” I say, walking faster as I grin at him.

I love having him here.