Page 40 of A Seaside Scandal (Change of Heart #2)

Chapter Twenty-Five

JONATHAN

Ihad never wanted to throw a facer at someone more in my life.

I stared at the man across from me, a bitterness rising in my throat.

Breaking the mirror would do nothing to repair the damage I had done, so I adjusted my cravat before turning away from my reflection in disgust and making my way toward the south wing.

It was still early, but Susan had planned to dress Margaret for the day earlier than usual in preparation for the guests that would be arriving soon.

Guilt clawed at my heart. For three years, Margaret had been the only person I had to care for.

Penelope had married, Joanna too, and Mother had left us all behind.

I had been so focused on protecting Margaret that I didn’t know how to protect my own wife.

I had hurt her.

What had possessed me to think that she had lured Margaret out of the house for a swim during a storm?

My heart had been raw from Lady Fenton’s observations in town, and my doubts had overtaken my judgment.

Alice, sweet Alice, who had planned an entire ball for my sister was not capable of hurting her.

I knew it, deep in my bones, so then why had I jumped to such horrible conclusions?

I put my face in my hands, exhaling a slow breath. I could still see the hurt flashing in her eyes—and the disappointment. Knowing that I had caused it made me physically ill. What could be done?

My trip to the modiste the day before had confirmed that Alice had indeed ordered several new gowns.

That information had been heavy on my mind when I returned to the house to find the staff in panic over Margaret’s disappearance.

When I had seen them both on the beach, my mind had drawn only one conclusion, and like a fool, I had voiced it.

Since then, Susan had relayed the true details of the story to me—how she had been the one to let Margaret out of her sight, and that Alice had run down to the beach to her rescue.

I was the most boorish man alive, and I simply did not deserve a woman like Alice.

Even now, as I watched Margaret twirl in a new white morning dress, my despair sank further through my stomach.

The dresses had been for Margaret.

How had I not seen it before? I had told Alice that the fortune was for Margaret’s use, and she had taken the initiative to commission her a new wardrobe. As a man, such matters rarely crossed my mind. But Alice thought of everything.

My admiration for my wife surged up inside me until I could hardly breathe. It wasn’t just admiration. It was stronger than that.

And I might have ruined everything.

My heart pounded fast in my chest, until I could hardly stand still. I needed to apologize. I had spent half the night rehearsing what I might say and attempting to predict how she might react. I didn’t deserve forgiveness so soon, but I would beg for it if I had to. I could not lose her.

My intentions for coming to the south wing were foggy now—all I could think of was Alice as I tore through the corridor toward the staircase.

I had only made it two steps down when I heard a familiar voice.

And then a head of golden curls came into view, large eyes shifting up the staircase in my direction.

It was Miss Charlotte Lyons.

ALICE

I was surprised to see Charlotte walk into the vestibule first, the butler holding the door open wide for her entrance. The scent of lavender followed her everywhere she went, trailing her movements like a tail on a cat.

Our eyes met as her foot touched the first black tile.

Silence fell.

“Alice?” she said in a quiet voice. I wasn’t certain why she seemed surprised—it was my home, after all.

She didn’t seem certain of what to do, her fingers pinching at the sides of her skirts.

The familiarity of her face and voice brought a surge of emotion to my chest. I wanted to hug her—to forget all the reasons we had fought.

Wouldn’t that be much easier than holding a grudge?

“It’s good to see you, Charlotte.” I held my ground so as to not overwhelm her. Had she spent the past few weeks hating me? I hardly knew what she thought of my sudden marriage and the scandal that had caused it. If I were her, I would have had an abundance of questions.

Her pale brows twitched before she looked down at the floor. “It is good to see you, too.”

I studied her downcast eyes. Charlotte rarely looked down unless she was flirting with a gentleman.

She was always looking up, lifting her chin and attempting to look confident.

Was she ashamed of how she had acted on her last day in Brighton?

I hadn’t thought my words had any effect on her—but perhaps they had.

Before we could speak further, my parents stepped through the doorway.

“Mama!” I walked forward, and she wrapped her arms around me. She smelled of sweet citrus and honey. Tears sprung to my eyes, but I blinked them away before she pulled back to look at my face.

“I cannot believe you’re here!” I squeezed her hands. Only a few weeks had passed since my wedding, yet it felt much longer than that. So much had happened, but the sight of my mother’s face stole away my worries—if only for the moment.

Her eyes twinkled with delight as she cast her gaze around the vestibule. “How is it that this house suits you so well? Look at the floors! They are just like ours.”

Beside her, Papa stepped forward, pulling me into his strong arms. A lump formed in my throat instantly.

I had never known a safer place in the world than beside my parents.

They had no idea how desperately I needed them today.

After the incident on the beach the night before, I had been angry, confused, and hiding away in my bedchamber.

I couldn’t do that any longer, though. I would have to hide my tears for my family’s sake and help Mrs. Linton and the other servants prepare for the ball.

Nothing could ruin Margaret’s special night—especially not me and my wayward emotions.

Not long ago, I had accepted my fate of a loveless marriage.

But then, foolishly, I had begun to hope for something different.

If I could somehow manage to transport my heart to the state it had been in before coming to Southcliff Manor—or Brighton—then I would learn to be happy again. I wouldn’t need Jonathan at all.

“Owen and Annette will be arriving later this afternoon,” Mama said as Edmund walked through the front door.

He towered a few inches above Papa, which he had always been quite proud of.

His dark hair was matted from wearing a hat all day, no doubt.

I wanted to tease him for it, but instead I ran into his embrace just as quickly as I had Mama’s.

“Thank you for coming.” I smiled up at him. My brother would be the first to notice if any of my unpleasant emotions were showing through my expression.

“It’s strange to see you as the mistress of a house,” he said with a grin. His gaze lifted to the furnishings in the grand vestibule. “Are you happy here?”

I swallowed hard, giving a quick nod. “Of course. How could I not be?” I turned away before he could inspect my face for any more clues.

My heart leaped.

Jonathan stood at the top of the staircase, silently observing my family’s entrance down below.

His eyes locked on mine, and I felt the blood drain from my face.

My body told me to run as far away from him as possible, but it was too late—he was already coming down the staircase.

Since the night before, I had been dreading the moment I would have to see him again.

I watched as he walked down the staircase toward us.

He wore a dark jacket and white cravat, his hair neat and orderly.

But there was something different about his face, a sense of reservation that made my heart sting.

What if we could never interact the same way again?

Not only had we fought, but his view of me was forever altered by the words I had spoken the night before.

I had confessed to falling in love with him.

Jonathan greeted my parents, Edmund, and Charlotte with a charm and friendliness that I had forgotten he possessed. No one would have known that something was so amiss between us. Our behavior could be just like it had been at church when we had pretended to be in love.

“I think my sister will be most comfortable if she meets each of you before the ball,” Jonathan said.

I shook myself of my worries, stepping into my role of hostess as I was meant to play it.

I nodded my agreement. “After you’ve settled in your rooms, I will show you to the south wing where you might become acquainted with Margaret.

” Accidentally, I exchanged a glance with Jonathan. We both looked away fast.

Mama seemed to notice.

So did Edmund.

Papa was not quite so observant, whistling a lively tune as he surveyed the paintings on the nearest wall.

Mrs. Linton stepped forward with a curtsy before leading each guest to their assigned chambers. Most of my family would be staying in the north wing with me, which would require an awkward explanation. I had never told Mama that Jonathan and I had planned to never share chambers…or even a corridor.

My family’s introductions to Margaret went well.

Even Charlotte spared her a kind smile, and it warmed my heart to see it.

I explained as much as I could about Margaret’s favorite pastimes, likes, dislikes, and personality.

I couldn’t tell if Margaret enjoyed the attention, but my family seemed to like her immensely.