Page 42 of A Little Crush (The Little Things #6)

RORY

I ’m not sure who this girl is. The one confidently standing in front of the only guy she’s ever had feelings for, asking him what he wants.

Yet, here I am. In the flesh. Six inches from the infamous Jaxon Thorne with only my very blunt question hanging between us.

Honestly, I blame Tatum. It’s clear she’s rubbing off on me, but I’m too determined to hear Jaxon out to care.

“What do you want, Jaxon?” I repeat.

His lips tug toward the ground as he considers my question. “No one asks me what I want.”

“I believe I just did,” I counter. “And that’s not an answer.”

The tendons along his jaw flex. “What if…what if what I want hurts you in the long run?”

Hurts me? He’s afraid of hurting me in the long run? Doesn’t he get it? Not being with him hurts me. Overthinking the push and pull he’s been putting me through hurts me. Living in denial and not knowing what he wants hurts me.

Playing with the hem of his shirt, I counter, “Maybe, for once in your life, you should stop thinking about other people’s feelings and be selfish.”

“Selfish, huh?” His fingers graze my waist, leaving a hot trail along my skin as he gives in and touches me.

“Yes,” I whisper. “Be selfish. Stop thinking of me or your ex or our families. What do you want , Jax?”

“I want to kiss you again.”

I lift my chin another centimeter and press my trembling hand to his chest, soaking in the familiar thump-thump against my palm as I silently beg my legs to not give out. “No one’s stopping you.”

“But what if?—”

“Don’t you dare finish that sentence.” Fisting the fabric of his T-shirt, I tug him toward me, daring him to push me away, to hit the final nail in the coffin and end things once and for all.

But he doesn’t. Instead, his lips meet mine as he captures my mouth in a kiss.

And it feels good. Really good. My own what-ifs threaten to rise to the surface, but I push them down, refusing to let my insecurities ruin this moment.

Because despite my faux confidence in the situation, he isn’t the only one who’s scared.

Who’s unsure. Who doesn’t know what they’re doing.

He isn’t the only one who doesn’t want to hurt anyone in the process of giving in to what they want for the first time… ever.

And, yes. I want this. I want this so much it hurts.

“Fuck, Squeaks,” he rasps against me. “This is such a bad idea, isn’t it?”

“Probably one of the worst,” I agree before diving in for another kiss. His fingers tickle my skin as he drags them across the hem of my sleep shorts before pressing his knee to the apex of my thighs. On instinct, my muscles tighten, and my core throbs.

Yeah, I’m ready. I don’t even know what I’m ready for, not personally, but I can feel it.

The desperation as it spreads through me.

It's not like I don’t know how sex works or what an orgasm feels like.

But experiencing it with someone is very different than on your own in a quiet room with nothing but your imagination to spur you on.

Having Jaxon up close and personal? His warm, woodsy scent washing over me?

His hands on my skin? His tongue dragging against mine?

It’s an entirely different concoction and puts any fantasy of what I thought it would be like to be with him to shame.

“Fuck,” he rasps. “The things I could do to you.”

“So do them,” I whisper, rolling my hips against his thigh.

“The cameras?—”

“I’ll wipe the footage before my parents even think about checking them,” I reply, daring him to come up with another excuse as to why we can’t keep this interaction on its current trajectory because, uh, yes, please.

Sucking on the sensitive patch of skin beneath my ear, he murmurs, “You should go out with me.”

Go out with him? He wants to talk about going out when it’s clear I’d rather have him come inside? And I mean it in the literal sense, just like Tatum suggested during our phone call a couple days ago.

Fighting the urge to roll my eyes, I squeeze them shut instead and tilt my head, giving him better access to whatever the hell he wants from me. “And you should not be a wet blanket and let me enjoy this.”

“Rore—”

“Come inside,” I beg. “I want to see what this is like without you pushing me away before we get to the good part.”

A low groan slips out of him as he dives in for another kiss, hitching his knee a little higher until all I can do is rub myself against him.

“Tell me your parents aren’t home,” he growls .

“My parents aren’t home.”

Bending down, he grabs the back of my thighs and scoops me into arms, making me squeal in surprise. “Spread your legs,” he orders.

So I do, wrapping them around his waist as he carries me toward one of the pool chairs that’s lying flat and sets me down.

I reach for his shoulders, praying he won’t pull away, and by some miracle, he doesn’t.

Instead, he climbs on top of me, shifting between my thighs until he’s cradled between them when his mouth meets mine again.

Liquid heat pools at my core as the ridge of his cock presses against me, leaving me lightheaded and needier than I’ve ever been.

A small part of me wonders if I’m moving too fast, but the other part?

The other part is screaming that this has never felt more right, and if we really consider the timeline of my crush on the guy, he’s basically put me through the slowest burn ever.

It’s not like I’ve kept my distance from the opposite sex because of fear or because I want to keep my virginity intact.

It’s because no one has ever made me feel the way I feel right now.

No one has ever made me want to be touched like this.

Like how Jaxon is touching me in this moment.

Arching my back against him, I let out a soft whimper, savoring the feel of his mouth on my sensitive skin.

“You a virgin, Beautiful?” he rasps against me.

My body oozes with need as I force my head to nod.

But the feel of his hands on me, his breath against the column of my throat, it’s too much.

He’s too much. My eyelids flutter, and I tilt my head a little more, giving him better access as he breathes me in before planting an open-mouth kiss against my neck.

“Gonna take things slow,” he promises, though I’m not sure if it’s for me or for him.

“Gonna worship every inch of you.” Kiss.

“Gonna drive you so crazy, you’ll be begging me to push into this tight little body with my cock.

But first?” His mouth reaches my ear, and he nips at the lobe.

“First, I’m gonna give you my fingers, then my mouth. You all right with that, Beautiful?”

My head bobs on another nod despite the lust fogging all my senses and turning me into a puddle of goo. Okay, the lust and the feel of his calloused fingertips trailing along my stomach. I want him.

“Please.” The word barely makes it past my lips.

“I got you, Rore,” he promises, letting me grind against him as his fingers find the edge of my sleep shorts before he slides them into my underwear. “Fuck, you’re soaked.”

“Seems you have that effect on me.” My words are breathless as he sweeps his fingers along my clit.

His mouth lifts, and he repeats the motion, gathering moisture from my slit and bringing it to the little bundle of nerves. “So sensitive.”

“Mm-hmm.” I grab his wrist and rock my hips. And it’s strange. Caught between wanting to push him away and pull him closer. Like it’s too much, yet not enough.

My eyelids flutter, and he folds forward, pressing a kiss to the edge of my mouth. “So fucking beautiful.”

Dipping into my slit, he plays with my entrance before giving me one finger, then two.

My lips part, and my breathing staggers at the intrusion.

It’s tight, and a little uncomfortable, but he pulls out seconds later, giving the same addictive attention to my clit until my hips are shifting toward him all over again.

“Gonna need to get rid of these shorts,” he murmurs.

I nod my approval, and he tugs on them until I’m left bare from the waist down.

The warm sun kisses my skin, making me feel even more exposed before Jaxon’s mouth is on mine all over again.

It’s like he knows. When my stupid insecurities are about to rear their ugly heads.

And he knows the best way to quiet them.

So I give in, focusing on the feel of his hands and mouth as he explores my body, using his own to block most of me from view.

Peppering kisses down my body, he sucks the skin beneath my bellybutton into his mouth before scooting lower.

“Jax,” I whisper.

He stops immediately.

“Tell me what you want,” he begs. “If you want me to stop?—”

“I don’t,” I rush out.

A patient smile graces his lips. “You sure?”

“Yeah, it’s just…new and scary, and…” I run my fingertips along the side of his face as his mouth hovers a few inches above my pubic bone.

And it’s strange. Seeing him like this. With me.

Right here. It’s hazy like a dream, yet so acute and sharp, I’m afraid I’ll be left flayed open and raw if we finish what we’ve started.

“Rory,” he breathes out. Indecision taints my name. Like he can’t decide whether or not this is a good idea.

“I’m fine.”

That same warm smile broadens before he sobers. “You’re a terrible liar.”

“I want this,” I whisper.

“You say stop, I stop,” he promises.

The word rests on the tip of my tongue, but I close my mouth instead, my chin dipping in another subtle nod.

Satisfied, Jaxon settles between my knees and kisses the little divot between my thighs and pussy.

My body jolts at the contact, pulling another smile from the man in front of me. “You’re gonna love this, Beautiful.”

He presses his mouth to my core, and I arch my back, ignoring the stars behind my eyelids. “And you?” I gasp. “I don’t want to do this if—” Sensation cuts me off as he sticks the tip of his tongue inside of me.

Holy hell .

“Jax,” I plead. “Jax?—”