Page 25 of A Curse of Breath and Blood (The Mind Breaker #1)
24 AELIA
Gideon held me by the neck over the black pool where the kraken’s razor-sharp teeth snapped at my feet.
“ Do you see the things you make me do, Aelia? ” His black eyes were full of ire. “ You drive me crazy. ”
He tightened his grip on my neck as I squirmed. “ Please, Gideon. Please don’t do this. ” Tears streamed down my face.
“ You make me hurt you. ”
“ I will be good, I promise. Please, Gideon. ” My voice cracked with fear.
Gideon’s eyes gleamed with delight as he pressed me closer to the kraken’s champing jaws. I held my breath, preparing for the creature’s fangs to rip through my flesh.
Pulling myself from the dream, I shot up in my bed.
A hot scream formed inside my lungs, scraping at my insides, begging to be released. Grabbing the nearest pillow, I yelled until my lungs gave out. For years, I dulled my pain with dust, and now, I found myself exposed—forced to face my fears sober. My brain burned with the need for a high.
Caiden burst through my door .
“Shh—it’s okay,” he said, running his hands through my sweat-slicked hair as I heaved ragged breaths into his chest.
I gripped his back tight, anchoring me to reality.
Fear coiled in my gut. How would I face him again?
Baylis had always been the stronger of the two of us. While I busied myself with royal dinners and sylph princes, she managed the domestic policy work at home. Every day, she visited my father in his chambers. He didn’t recognize her most days, but that never diminished her hope.
A memory floated to the surface of my mind.
“ How was he today? ” I asked as we walked down the cobblestone streets to the River House.
Her gray eyes darted to the ground. “ For a moment, I thought he was himself again. ”
“ Really? What did he say? ” Our father rarely recognized any of us anymore. The potions Ragana brewed kept him in a near catatonic state. It was safer that way for all of us.
Baylis sighed. “ He said he knew who I was. ”
I arched an eyebrow, smothering any flicker of hope. “ And? ”
Baylis shook her head. Strands of blonde hair escaped its meticulous bun. “ It was odd. I swear to the Trinity, he recognized me. It was only for a moment, but his eyes told me he knew who I was. ”
I shrugged. “ Well, that’s more than I got the last time I visited him. ”
She squinted, focusing on the memory. “ He said something before he slipped back into his fugue. ”
“ I’m sure it was riveting and not dribble at all. ”
Baylis ignored my vitriol. “ He said something about two little birds. One high on a mountain. The other, lost in shadow. He said both would be broken. I wonder what that could mean. ” She bit her lip, pondering the ravings of a madman.
“ I don’t know how you do it, Baylis. ”
“ Do what? ” she asked, as if awakening from a trance.
“ Visit him every day. ”
Baylis pondered my question for a moment. “ I don’t want him to be alone. It must be scary wherever he is. I want him to know we still love him. At least, that’s what I’d want my family to do for me. I guess a part of me still thinks if I love him enough, he’ll find his way back to us. ”
A sob rose in my throat at the memory of my sister.
I took the opposite approach, opting to act as though my father and his demons did not exist. His lucid days were the worst. For a moment in time, we glimpsed the father we knew, only to watch him fade into nothingness.
I wanted to reach out and grasp him. To keep him here, in the present, with us, but there was nothing to grab, like a light dimming through the night until you were left in utter blackness.
For years, I prayed to Ammena to heal him. I bargained, smashed things, and finally accepted he was gone. He was forty-five when they lowered his body into the unforgiving earth, but he had been dead long before that. The maggots could ravage his corpse for all I cared. I would not shed another tear for him.
Melancholy wrapped itself around me like a warm blanket. With my emotions depleted, I had nothing left to give anyone. I slept for weeks, only rising so the sheets could be changed.
A succubus in human form, Gideon fed off my pain, absorbing it like soil absorbs the rain.
A willing victim, I confided all my deepest fears in him. Little did I realize he would manipulate those fears to his advantage, unraveling my emotions until I was held together by threads. He cut the remaining strings one by one until I became the puppet he desired.
I died in Ryft’s Edge. Only my corpse continues, fueled by hate and the lust for revenge.