Page 73 of A Convenient Secret

“You’re blabbering again.” She flinches, but I take her hand. “Fuck, Lily, I’m tempted to agree, but it’s insanity. We already have a complicated relationship.”

“So you’d prefer to bring a stranger to live with your children?”

Fuck, when she puts it like that… Having a sham marriage with a woman who already takes care of my kids would make the most sense. I told my lawyer to find a different strategy. But maybe it’s that simple… That’s preposterous.

“How much?” I’m not sure why I’m investigating that. I’m not going to go through with this, am I?

“How much?” She frowns.

“You said you’re doing it for money.” I study her. Even in the shadows of the dimly-lit terrace, I see her cheeks darken with a blush.

“Ten thousand,” she blurts out.

“What do you need ten K for?” It doesn’t feel like a high enough sum to bother. But perhaps my expectations have been skewed by Kendra’s demands.

“That’s none of your business. And stop interrogating me. I thought I was helping you, not subjecting myself to scrutiny.”

I close my eyes, a part of me wishing I could open them to possibilities where she was mine, truly mine. An equally strong part reminds me I need to backpedal from this.

Herein lies the problem, though. If last month taught me anything, there is no backpedaling from Lily.

I look up, hoping for some interference from the universe, but my eyes land on the upper level where the two most important people of my life sleep soundly, unaware of the potential threat of their mother breaking their hearts.

“Nobody can know about this. Especially not thetwins.” Have I just made a decision? Am I accepting this insane plan?

“How would that work?”

“The lawyer will protect the kids at all costs. They won’t be subjected to testifying. He’s getting Kendra to agree to that stipulation. She will, because it wouldn’t help her case for a cooperation. She would accept to establish her goodwill. So the worst that could happen is a visit from social services.”

“So I’ll just remain your live-in nanny, but on paper you look like you have a stable home.”

“Pretty much.” Fuck, why are we discussing these details?

“And you give me ten thousand,” she reminds me, and a part of me resents her for that.

I have no right to wish she would do it for free. I have no right to expect her to do it, period. And yet here I am, resenting her a bit for it.

She looks out, pinning her gaze to the flickering skyscrapers beyond the park. The lights twinkle playfully on her beautiful face, illuminating her cheekbones and that beautifully slanted nose. She’s a vision.

Her chest rises and falls, but otherwise, she is perfectly still in the background of the nightlife.

And in that moment, I know I’m about to make the worst mistake of my life.

“It looks like you finally have a nanny who survived.” Roxy crosses her legs, trying to engage me in idle chatter while we wait for the rest of the team in Corm’s office.

Apparently, timely arrival at our regularly scheduled partners’ meetings is no longer expected.

I tap my fingers on the armrests. “Zach and Zoya like her.” Not as much as me. I banish the thought as quickly as it appears.

“Good, finally a responsible nanny.”

Neither of us is responsible, if the courthouse appointment in two days is any indication.

I glare at Roxy, hoping to stop her from talking, even though I know she is immune to any and all intimidating tactics.

“I can’t say I missed this office.” Cal saunters in ten minutes late, but I don’t point that out since he saved me from Roxy’s interogation.

“Sorry I’m late.” Corm files in before Cal even takes a seat. “Where is Xander?”