Page 38 of A Bond so Fierce and Fragile (Compelling Fates Saga #3)

Frelina

“ W ell, that was a waste of time,” Raine declared as he lifted his flask to his lips when the final wyvern disappeared into the cerulean sea.

Frelina fought an urge to slap it out of his hand, throw the silver bottle overboard, and let the depths swallow it forever.

“It wasn’t,” Elessia responded softly, although Frelina could see the twinge of worry flitting across her sister’s face when she turned toward the cabins. “They’re coming with us.”

“But they’re not fighting.” Raine shook his head. “We have no chance.”

Her sister halted with a foot in the air, her back still turned toward them, and it was quiet for a beat, the soft waves lapping the hull the only sound as the ship continued weaving through the island-littered sea, somehow steering itself.

Then Elessia spoke again. “There is always a chance. However small that chance might be.”

Frelina winced at the crack snaking its way into her voice, and she took a step forward when Merrick stormed past her, reaching Elessia in a few long strides and swooping her up into his arms, burrowing his face in her neck as he marched them both inside.

“They’re in a hurry,” Raine muttered as he finally sheathed the swords he’d drawn to protect them. “Guess we have to make the most of it now…”

How he thought those blades would do anything, Frelina didn’t know. While they looked terrifying, it didn’t seem like they’d do a lick against the hard scales covering the wyverns’ massive bodies.

“Can you blame them?” Frelina asked when Raine sighed deeply again, mumbling something about this being “pointless.”

Raine rolled his eyes as he made a move to take another damned sip of liquor, and the sight of it ignited a rage within her that burned so hot it seemed her eyes heated as well.

“Do you have no empathy?” Frelina snarled.

“Oh, I have plenty.” Raine waved with his flask. “This just cures it.”

She ground her teeth so hard her head hurt.

She hated that liquor. She hated how she’d catch Raine’s eyes from time to time and see something real only for it to be replaced with muted glossiness as soon as he sipped from his flask.

“Why so angry, little Rantzier?” Raine shook his head, making his hair fly around his face and his reddish stubble sparkle in the sunlight. “I am just saying what everyone is thinking. It is pointless now. We won’t win this. We should just run.”

What everyone…

She was going to kill this stupid Fae.

Taking a step toward him, Frelina seethed, “Why am I so angry?”

She took another step as her vision colored scarlet.

“Why am I so angry?” she repeated.

“Yes, do tell,” Raine responded calmly, only watching her as she closed the distance between them, nearing him where he now leaned on his elbows against the wooden wyvern in the bow.

“Because of you,” Frelina spat. “You’re so fucking stupid. You’re only focusing on forgetting—drinking your damned liquor and floating away in your clouded mind while the rest of us—” She had to clear her throat as her voice broke, and it made her even angrier.

Spit flew from her mouth as she took another step toward him, almost standing chest to chest now.

But she didn’t care.

“While the rest of us what?” Raine shot her a lopsided smile that had Frelina lift her hand to smack him.

Unfortunately, he was faster, and he caught the hand as it slashed toward his cheek.

As he held on to her, forcing her body to fully align with his, she could barely see from the anger that overtook her.

“You don’t get it!” she screamed. “The rest of us are trying to remember every moment we have left! Can’t you see Merrick is nearly breaking? That Elessia is barely holding it together? And still they’re both stronger than you are! Elessia is twenty-five years old! Did you know that?”

Frelina was crying now, but it didn’t matter; she continued, her words coming out clipped and jumbled. They just needed to get out.

“She is going to die!” she cried. “Do you not understand that? She is walking, talking, going on missions, speaking to fucking wyverns! Instead of hiding away in her misery like you are!”

Raine’s smile faded, but he didn’t push her off. Instead, he remained quiet, his fingers still wrapped around her wrist as she yelled at him, his chest moving steadily against her wild one.

“You have lived, Raine!” Her voice cracked with every beat of her heart, and she wasn’t sure if she imagined it, but it seemed as if Raine pulled her closer yet.

She could at least smell his whiskey-and-wood scent clearly now.

“You… you have loved.” Frelina blinked against the tears in her eyes, feeling her cheeks sting from the salt of the ones that had already escaped.

“You even found your mate! You have lived while the rest of us… we’ll…

” A hiccup interrupted her, and she swallowed.

“I’ll die without any of that. I’ll die having lived twenty-four years on an island with only my parents and my sister and…

” Another hiccup. “A healer that came once in a while.”

An arm wrapped around her. Then another, and her hand fell to his chest when Raine let it go.

As he tried to pull her into the embrace, she slammed the hand against his chest. “Stop it.”

It felt good.

It helped.

Frelina lifted her other one and struck it as well against his leather-clad muscles when he tugged at her again. “Stop!”

Smack.

“Stop!”

Smack.

“Stop!”

Smack.

Raine just let her take out her frustrations, his arms loosely lying across her back.

“Fight back!” she screamed when she accidentally met his eyes and there was only kindness in them. Kindness and understanding.

“Fight back!” She hammered both her fists against his body.

Again.

And again.

“F-fight back,” she cried.

“Fight…” Her voice drifted away as too much thickness filled her throat.

More tears streamed down her face, and this time when Raine pressed on her lower back, she let him fold her body against his.

Frelina cried like she’d never cried before.

Her entire body shook. Her face scrunched so much she could feel a headache creeping up the back of it. Her skin scraped against Raine’s leather tunic as he only held her closer for every hiccup, for every sharp breath, for every whimper and sob.

“It’s… it’s all a joke to you,” Frelina finally got out as the tears came slower. “But… it’s not for the rest of us. It’s… not a joke.”

“I’ve never said I think it’s all a joke.” Raine’s voice rumbled through her as it echoed in his chest. “It’s no joke to me, little Rantzier.”

Frelina sniffed.

She didn’t know how to respond. She’d never heard him sound like this.

Glancing up at him, she stiffened.

Tears glistened on the mind-bender’s cheeks as well. Tears he didn’t bother to hide as he met her eyes, lifting a hand to wipe away her own.

“None of this is a joke to me,” Raine continued in a serious voice.

She stared at him as his thumb caressed the warm and wet skin across her cheeks, and the air around them stilled under his slow movements.

She couldn’t hear the waves anymore.

Or the wind.

Frelina could only follow the green, brown, and gold swirls in Raine’s eyes as he looked back at her.

There was so much more gold than she’d realized. Gold like she knew her own eyes glowed when she used her magic, just like Elessia’s. The honey color traced around his irises, almost dancing as the black in his eyes deepened. As it grew…

Frelina hiccuped again.

Raine shook his head, breaking their stare off, and the sounds around them came back.

Soft whistling wind.

Water rippling.

The scent of summer and winter tangling all around.

Her salt-covered cheeks heated before she could stop them, but as she made to take a step back, Raine tightened his hold.

“I…” He blew up his cheeks, releasing a deep breath before continuing. “I want to show you something.”

Frelina was about to ask him what he wanted to show her when he caught her eyes again, and somehow, she knew.

Raine nodded, and his mouth twitched as if he tried to lift the corners of it but failed.

Close your eyes.

Frelina did as he asked her in her mind.

As her eyelids fluttered shut, Raine pulled her even closer, but not to comfort her.

No. It was he who needed someone to steady him—someone to keep him grounded.

When his memories crashed into her without warning, Frelina understood why.

Ice-filled wind rushed all around him, and an overwhelming tiredness swept through Raine as he pulled open the door to the old tavern.

They’d trained all day, and Merrick had nearly killed him when he lost his temper.

Which might have had something to do with Raine telling all the females flocking around the soldier camp they’d set up outside town that Merrick was looking for a wife.

Despite his cold, stiff limbs, Raine snickered. He’d barely ever seen Merrick take an interest in females. He was too busy brooding and worrying if he was an evil threat to the world to entertain himself with ladies.

Raine, on the other hand…

His snicker turned into a big grin when the warmth of the tavern wrapped around him and Thissian and Kerym waved to him from the back. The warmth seeped through his body, and as it heated his limbs, they hurt even more—but he didn’t have time to linger on it as something brushed his nose.

What was that?

Raine whipped his head back and forth until his gaze settled on a tiny little Fae with hair so blonde that it almost seemed white cascading down her back.

His entire being melted.

Then hardened.

Then melted again.

Raine couldn’t stop himself from turning fully toward her, and his feet moved of their own accord as they brought him to the female, his gaze locked on her the entire time.

She must have felt him coming because she turned around, and he was rewarded with the darkest eyes he’d ever seen.

She was full of contrasts.

Tiny but with a look in her eyes that would have made males bigger than Raine shrink back.

White hair and black eyes and golden skin.

Full lips in a dainty face.

She was… everything.

He must have stumbled into tables and people because he both felt people push him and heard people curse him.

It didn’t matter.

That…

She…

As he halted before her, the barkeep tapped her shoulder, and this little wild creature continued meeting his eyes as she said, “Oh, fuck. I think I might need two drinks because this seems to be my mate.”

The memory switched to another, and Frelina could barely breathe from how hard Raine held on to her.

Raine winced at himself in the mirror, pulling at the violet shirt and trousers that clashed horrifically with his red hair while Merrick slapped his hands on his knees and wheezed from laughter.

“You must… must truly love her,” his friend got out between fits of laughter.

The memory switched again.

Wearing the same clothes, Raine walked down an alley lined with white flowers, toward the female he loved so much he could barely speak when he was in her presence.

A blur of faces looked up at him from the grass, but he could see only her.

Solana giggled as she reached out a hand and clasped his.

“It’s you and me forever now.”

More memories flooded Frelina.

Raine and Solana moving into a house with a haunted-looking Merrick helping them.

Sunny days in forests and fields and water.

Holding hands before fires.

Holding hands while cooking.

Love. So much love.

Then another memory.

It was misty outside their house, and Raine tapped his foot while waiting for Solana to come home.

He was hungry, and he’d spent all day preparing a new meal for her.

It definitely shouldn’t have taken this long, but he’d burned the first two batches of bread, so he’d had to start over twice.

He’d never admit that to her, though.

When the door burst open, Raine turned around with two glasses of wine and a broad smile on his face.

Finally.

But it was Merrick’s terrified and white face that met him.

The glasses fell to the ground, where they shattered in the same way that fear exploded within him.

“He has her,” Merrick said, and Raine knew his world was about to change forever.

Frelina started shaking at the next memories that assaulted her mind, and Raine’s arms locked around her, his breathing quickening.

War.

Death.

So much fear and terror and so many haunting scenes.

Both within Raine and those around him.

And all the time… Solana in his mind.

Seeing her in Rioner’s cellars.

Seeing her beaten and hurt and broken.

When the next memory came, Frelina’s knees buckled, and she wondered if Raine hadn’t held on to her for support after all, as he pressed her so hard against him that she couldn’t move.

Solana was still too thin, but her smile was as bright as ever as she chased Raine through the woods outside their house.

Raine threw a glance to the south as they reached the pebbled path to the small cottage, even if he knew Merrick would never walk down those steps again, not after swearing that oath to Rioner.

The fucking martyr, giving up his own life for Solana and Thissian’s and Kerym’s mates, making Raine feel equally guilty and so damned grateful.

Solana, always knowing what was going on in his head, wrapped her arms around his waist, looking up at him as she said, “We’ll get him out. We’ll get strong and then get him away from him.”

Raine gave her a smile, albeit a weak one, before his eyes drifted to the woods again.

Something glimmered there, but he didn’t have time to react before Solana jerked.

Then jerked again.

Something in him pulled, and as he looked down at his mate, blood bubbled out of the corners of Solana’s mouth.

“No!” he screamed as she went limp in his arms.

The thing within him that had pulled snapped.

And his entire world broke.

Frelina panted against the pain that surrounded her, that filled her, that suffocated her.

She knew it was Raine’s. This was what he carried each day. But she couldn’t shake it.

Her eyes were still closed when Raine’s broken whisper brushed her cheek. “Do you see now? Do you see why… why I can’t?”

Frelina only nodded, fresh tears falling down her face, mingling with Raine’s as he pressed the side of his face against hers.

They gripped each other as if the world would end if they didn’t.

And who knew? Perhaps it would.

It wasn’t until the air around them truly quieted that they let go of each other, and fear replaced the sorrow within Frelina when mirror images of their ship, of them, of Merrick and Elessia running up the stairs shimmered all around them.

“I guess this is the Lakes of Mirrors,” Raine whispered as he wiped his face, releasing her but remaining close as their ship continued traveling on the lake, amid the water that rose around them as if it were walls and met above them to form a ceiling.