Page 31

Chapter 31

Thevin

Saelyn’s snorting laughter woke me in her bed. I hadn’t meant to fall asleep right away, but apparently I did, clothes intact. I stretched my arms over my head and searched for water. After gulping a full cup, I ran a hand through my hair and opened the door a sliver, trying to guess at who Sae was laughing with in the main room. I assumed it was a woman—someone with a low voice that I didn’t recognize as anyone Sae would know in the Spire .

I glanced back to the clock in the room and cursed. The evening had already begun, and I was never going to hear the end of my parent’s scolding if I wasn’t dressed in time for dinner. I entered the main room soundlessly, spying Sae sitting on the balcony while a servant I recognized, but couldn’t remember the name of, shoved pins into her hair.

The woman was mid-sentence when she spotted me walking toward them. A cool smirk lifted over her mouth as she greeted me. “ Hello , sir, I hope you slept well.”

Saelyn all but jumped out of her seat, the last few curls of her long, black hair bouncing over her shoulder as she darted across the room to me, grabbing my arms. “ You slept for three hours!” She shook me slightly, her dark blue eyes lined in copper kohl. The color somehow made her eyes look bluer, brighter, reminding me of the sea at the edge of the Spire’s white stone cliffs.

“ I love this,” I brushed my fingers just below her eye, careful to not disturb what the woman had artistically added.

Sae’s smile widened and she raised her chin. “ Thank you. Amaya is very talented.”

I moved my hand up to touch the woven braid in her hair, thick and sparkling with silver pins in a crown over her head. She swatted my hand away, scolding, “ You’ll mess it up!” Grabbing my shoulder, she turned me toward the door. “ You only have an hour before dinner and the gathering after. Go get yourself together and run a comb through your hair.” She shoved me playfully, and I pretended to stumble across the room, hand over my heart in mock distress.

I reached for the door but it opened for me, the Baron of Felgren surprised to see me there. She gave me a short-lived small smile, and I stepped aside for her to enter.

“ Your parents are waiting for you,” she said, jerking her head to the hallway where, indeed, both of my parents, already dressed for dinner, eyed me with a special disappointment I knew well.

I sighed, gave one last smirk to Sae , and closed the door behind me as I left.

“ I assume you know what we have to say,” my father started, his arm around my mother’s waist as they headed to the door of the rooms we’d share.

“ I can guess,” I muttered under my breath.

They opened the door and we stepped inside. One glance told me it was similar to the rooms we usually used in our short stints in the Spire , gathering new channelers for the Baron to train.

It would take months for us to find them. So few channelers had been born in the last two decades, and the rest were conscripted in the war already.

I leaned against the door, my arms crossed, bracing myself for what I was about to hear.

My mother poured a cup of tea at the sideboard, adding a little sugar before bringing it to me. I thanked her and held it warm in my hands as she settled in next to my father on the coral couch in the center of the room.

He gestured to the chair across from them and said, “ Sit , Thevin .”

Reluctantly , I crossed the room, bringing my much-needed tea with me.

Once I was settled, my father leaned forward, asking, “ Are you alright?”

I took a quick sip of tea before answering, “ I’m fine.”

“ I can’t believe you did that today,” he said, focusing his dark eyes on my face.

“ It was just an accident. I was lucky Sae was there to pull me out of the water and that conduit, Clairannia , was nearby to help me breathe again. You know I’ve been through worse.”

“ It’s not that, son,” my mother began, “of course we are relieved you are not drowned at the bottom of the Hatchery , but taking Sae out of the Spire for hours…” she trailed, shaking her head. “ This isn’t like Felgren . You two cannot go about like you have normal lives. She’s the Baron’s daughter. She’s actively being sought after by the Blightress herself, and she doesn't understand the extent of any of this.”

“ She deserves to see the world.” My voice hardened in my rising anger. “ She deserves to live her life, and if I can help her do that, I’m going to.”

“ Her mother was worried?—”

I cut my father off with a wave. “ Her mother is always worried. Always calculating ways to keep her daughter from any harm, which keeps her closed up like a precious stone in a box. If anyone should see what this world is like, it’s her. She should be out there with us. She should be given the opportunity to understand what we fight for. What her father fought for.”

“ And you’ve told her? What it’s like on the front lines?” my mother asked in her quiet way.

“ Yes . She’s heard it from me. But she needs to see it. If we could just take her to the Blight Line? —”

“ It’s not our choice,” my father cut in. “ That’s up to the Baron , and a decision will be made at the gathering tonight.”

I let out a deep breath, gulping down most of the tea. “ I’d better get ready.” I rose and headed toward my room.

My mother murmured something to my father and then followed, her steps light on the stone floor. “ May I come in?” She stood at the open door as I chucked off my shirt, headed toward the washing room.

“ Yes .”

I loved my parents. They’d given me a hard task in life, but had loved and cared for me every step of the way, allowing me to find and learn my place in the isle, never berating me too hard when I made mistakes. They had let me live where Saelyn had not been able to. Adventuring through Felgren wasn’t like adventuring outside of it. I knew that. Of course, I knew that.

“ Your clothes are laid out for you in the closet,” she said, pulling at the hem of her ruby silk gloves that slid past her elbows.

I nodded, headed there before her next words stopped me. “ Does Saelyn know your feelings for her?”

My heart thudded in my chest and I turned. “ She knows enough.”

“ And her response?” she pressed.

“ We’re friends, Mother .”

“ You’re more than that.”

“ We’re not,” I said curtly. “ We’re best friends. Nothing more.”

“ She cares deeply for you and you, her. We all see it.”

I scoffed and called back to her from inside the closet. “ What you see is two people who’ve been friends for a very long time. She wants it to stay that way, and I’m fine with that.”

“ She just needs time, Thevin . Don’t give up on her.”

I stuck my head out from the closet. “ I’m not giving up on her. If anyone here is on Sae’s side, it’s me.” I continued to dress, donning the velvet cerulean jacket and flicking up the high collar of my shirt. The pants I’d been given were a midnight blue, a contrast to the hue of the jacket. I left the shirt open slightly at the chest, as was the fashion and rolled back the sleeves of my jacket, showing off the silk pattern of yellow leaves underneath—another of the Spire’s customs.

My mother followed me to the washing room. “ She’ll need you before long when she truly understands just how different life is outside of Felgren .” Clearing her throat, she added, “ Outside of the Spire .”

I splashed my face with cool water, patting it dry and grabbing the comb to manage the curls at the top of my head. “ She has me,” I responded, catching the stare of my mother in the seashell mirror. “ There’s nothing more I can do than be there for her, and I’m going to keep doing that.”

She nodded once, stepping closer to smooth the lines of my jacket. “ She has a good friend. The best kind there is.”

Her words stung, grating against my skin.

Because I wanted more than that. I’d take what I had with Sae and be happy with it, but if my parents could see how I felt… I knew they couldn’t be the only ones.

I decided I didn’t care. Let them pity me. Let them wonder why Sae didn’t want our relationship to change. I’d wondered the same over and over since the night a few days ago when I’d laid it all out, letting her choose to take the risk or not.

“ I’m ready,” I finally replied, pulling at the collar one more time and taking one last glance in the mirror.

“ You look handsome.” She smiled at me and the soft lines around her eyes crinkled, for once showing her age.

I looked mostly like her with the same blue eyes, the same golden curls. But where her skin was pale, mine held a darker hue. I’d always tanned easily, and every summer my skin became darker in the Felgren summer sun, closer to my father’s.

“ And you’re beautiful as always, Mother .” I kissed her cheek and stepped past, ready to move on from our conversation and go to dinner, pretending my heart wasn’t a wounded, bloody mess.