Page 33
Story: What I Should Have Felt
But I also couldn’t let go of shit I’d seen overseas. Children weren’t off limits in war, and while I rationally knew this wasn’t war, this was a fight, a battle, and no matter how much I wished I didn’t know the reality of the nasty shit of the world, I did.
And I wouldn’t risk pretending like monsters didn’t exist at the expense of someone innocent to the harsh realities of how cruel this life could be.
Chapter 14
FORD
After noting four different vehicles parked in the high school lot, I wandered away from the tall, red brick building and up a small hill toward the football stadium. Inside those metal bleachers that encircled the field, Azelie and her friends should be waiting.
By themselves. If I got up there and found O’Connor, there was a part of me that I worried I wouldn’t be able to keep locked away. Protecting people I’d never met came rather instinctively to me, but this time it wasn’t someone I didn’t know. This was Azelie, someone Colette cared about and loved. Someone I knew.
This was my home. This asshole was on my turf. Coming for the very people that I’d left to protect all those years ago. As silent as the air around me, I crept up the hillside. Déjà Vu was my friend at this moment, because the last time I’d snuck beneath these bleachers was to meet another LeBlanc.
I figured I’d breach through the side, instead of just walking straight in through the main entrance beside the picket fence and the rundown ticket booth. Just in case. As I wandered around the edge, sweat pooled on my neck in anticipation of whatever fight may occur. The only strange thing about this moment was being alone. I half expected some dark whispered comment from Bernie over the comms or some instruction from Dom siphoning into my ear.
But not even a potato bug crawled upon the cement that I crept across.
The metal of the bleachers was cold beneath my hand as I ducked underneath the crisscross of silver. A stuffiness surrounded me as the air stilled, as if trying to hide my presence. All of this was familiar. Every hair standing on end upon my body, the adrenaline pouring through my veins was a sensation I knew and craved.
Further evidence that avoiding conflict wasn’t something I desired as much as I used to. Was it preferable? Always. But I’d take a fight over running away any day if that meant taking care of the people that I cared about.
What a fucking foolish decision it had been to leave. I was bigger than her parents, even then I’d been taller. Maybe I could’ve handled it and won. Maybe I could’ve taken them on, but at what cost? The control in fights I had now, I hadn’t possessed then, even if I’d been willing to stay and possibly fight instead of being killed.
Slowly, I weaved my way through the shadowed surroundings as teenage chatter met my ears. I paused, scanning for any sound of a threat or an adult, and immediate relief flooded my body. I braced a hand againsta beam and allowed the brief worry to slither from my veins. They were fine.
“How long did you say it would take?” a young man said, his voice cracking from puberty, and I chuckled. I was not a stranger to that myself, though the last time I’d had any sort of moment like that was years ago.
“My mom said maybe fifteen minutes or less? So, about five more minutes and he should be here,” a girl replied. A girl I knew from listening to her speak to Colette, and my heart stopped in my chest.
Did she saymom?
“Let me see his picture one more time,” another girl replied. I had to assume that was Macy, since Azelie had said Macy’s mom would take over a half hour, and she was the only other girl mentioned.
Creeping forward so I could see out from beneath the bleachers, I focused on the group. Two boys and two girls. Azelie sat between the other girl who had sleek blonde hair pulled back in a tight, low ponytail. She stared over Azelie’s shoulder, with the same nosiness as the curly, dark-haired boy on her other side, who inched closer to see the screen.
The sun beat down upon the red track encircling the green turf field in the center. The blue paint upon the field goal posts was peeling, and I doubted they’d retouched it in the past ten years at least. The white lines on the track asphalt were a bit faded, but not terribly worn. At least that had had some renovation because I could’ve sworn it was black the last time I saw it.
All four kids sat on the turf inside the ring, wearing matching running uniforms that I knew for sure hadn’t changed. Colette had convinced me to join cross country our freshman and sophomore years, which I turnedout to be really good at, and it was like looking in a mirror at these lanky kids who had yet to develop any muscles.
“I know him. My mom was talking about how the Thibodeauxs’ son returned the other day, and she pointed at a guy who looked exactly like that when we went into town,” Macy stated and leaned back against her palms, turning her face toward the sky.
“Isn’t your family, like, not cool with the Thibodeauxs?” the dark-haired boy asked.
Azelie placed her phone against the turf and curled her legs up to her chest. “Yeah. I mean, all my grandparents have been able to talk about lately is ‘the Thibodeauxs this, and the Thibodeauxs that.’ Honestly, it’s getting annoying,” she replied and plunked her chin against her knees.
Grandparents.
“And yet, your mom sent their son. The dude who left fifteen years ago for no reason?” the other boy said. He pushed some light brown hair away from his face, the shaggy strands coated in a thin layer of sweat.
Frozen in place, my hand cemented to the beam I braced against as nausea curled up in my throat. Colette wasn’t Azelie’s older sister. Colette was her mom. I briefly closed my eyes and then returned my gaze to the group of kids.
“I heard he left because he accidentally killed someone,” the dark-haired boy replied.
Azelie clicked her tongue. “You’re an idiot, Cory. If he’d killed someone, he’d be in jail.”
“Well, I heard he left because he—” Macystarted.
“Y’all look like you’re lonely,” an older male voice sheared the casual conversation occurring.
Table of Contents
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