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I lean back against the couch, my breathing still uneven but slowly calming as the silence wraps around me like a blanket. The realization that Robbie is back—that I’ll have to face him and somehow pretend everything is fine—settles heavily on my chest.
I press the cold towel to my wrist again, though the ice is nearly melted by now, willing myself to focus on the sensation. Inhale, exhale. One breath at a time. I can do this. I have to do this.
As much as I want to disappear, I remind myself why I’m here in the first place. Robbie. He’s the reason I stayed after that fight, the reason I didn’t pack up and leave the moment Cole yelled that I was fired. Because that little boy needs someone in his corner, someone who won’t give up on him.
And right now, that someone is me.
The thought steadies me, even as tears threaten to sting my eyes again. I squeeze them shut, taking one more deep breath before finally pushing myself to stand.
Robbie’s back, and it’s time to face the day. But just for now, I’ll look for a bathroom and take these last few moments to regroup. Then I’ll go to him, and I’ll be the person he needs me to be. The person I promisedmyself I’d be when I took this job.
***
The moment I step out of the pool house, the cool, almost evening air brushes against my skin, and I pause, drawing in a long, steadying breath. My heart still beats a little too fast, but the sharp edges of panic have dulled, replaced by a nervous energy that hums through me.
I smooth my hands over my shirt, trying to shake off the lingering tension as I make my way toward the main house.
The backyard is still and quiet, the only sound coming from the faint rustling of leaves in the breeze. The pool is closed, which is why I never spend much time out here.
Well, that has to change, I decide. It’s L.A., for God’s sake. Why the hell is the pool closed? It’ll be hotter than sin soon, and there’s a five-year-old boy—and his nanny—ready to play in the pool.
As I walk up the path, the mansion looms ahead, its sheer size and grandeur a reminder of just how out of place I feel in this world. I’m acutely aware of every step I take, my sneakers brushing softly against the stone of the path.
When I reach the back door, I hesitate for a moment, resting my hand on the cool metal of the handle. I glance down at my clothes—slightly wrinkled from sitting in the pool house—and smooth them down again, hoping it’s not obvious that I just had a full-blown panic attack. My fingers tugat the hem of my shirt, straightening it, and I pull in another breath.
You’ve got this. Just act normal.
The door creaks softly as I open it, stepping into the warmth of the house. The faint sounds of activity filter through the air—pots clattering in the kitchen, the muffled hum of distant conversation, and then a sound that makes me stop in my tracks.
Robbie’s voice.
It’s bright and animated, carrying through the hall with an excitement I don’t hear often. I freeze for a second, the sound washing over me like a balm. I can’t make out what he’s saying, but it’s enough to know he’s happy. For once, I let myself smile. Telling Ellis all about his trip to the grocery store, no doubt.
I move quietly, the polished wood floors cool beneath my feet as I walk through the hallway. The voices grow clearer, guiding me toward the source. I pause when I reach the foyer, my hand brushing the smooth wood of the staircase as I glance around. The sound isn’t coming from the foyer, as I expected—it’s coming from the sitting room just off to the side.
I take a step closer, careful not to make too much noise, and peek around the corner.
Robbie is perched on the edge of one of the armchairs, his little hands waving animatedly as he talks. He’s facing away from me, so I can’t see his face,but I imagine it’s lit up with enthusiasm, his hazel eyes sparkling in a way that they don’t often enough.
It takes me a moment to register who he’s talking to, but when I do, my stomach flips.
Cole is sitting across from him, his posture relaxed but his attention fully on Robbie. Just the way I said. No laptop, no phone, just him.
He’s leaning forward slightly, his elbows resting on his knees, and there’s a faint smile on his lips as he listens. It’s a softer expression than I’ve ever seen from him, and it catches me off guard.
I hover in the doorway, watching the scene unfold like an outsider peering into a life that isn’t mine.
Robbie is talking a mile a minute, his words tumbling over each other as he recounts the details of their grocery trip.
“And then Evelyn said I could pick out my own cereal, but I didn’t know which one to get, so she said I could get two!” Robbie’s voice is breathless with excitement. “And there were so many! Did you know there’s a cereal with dinosaurs on it, Dad? Real dinosaurs!”
Cole nods, his smile widening just enough to make the corners of his eyes crinkle. “I didn’t know that. Did you get it?”
“Yeah! Evelyn said it’s okay as long as I don’t eat too much sugar,” Robbie says, his voice lowering to a conspiratorial whisper. “But Ithink she only said that because she didn’t want me to get three cereals.”
Cole chuckles, a soft, genuine sound that makes something in my chest ache. “Sounds like a smart rule.”
Robbie grins, clearly pleased with himself, and launches into another story about the grocery store. I shift my weight, feeling like an intruder even though neither of them has noticed me yet. Usually, I’d clear my throat or step into the room to announce myself, but I can’t bring myself to do it. Not now.