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Even if that’s not the healthiest thing in the world…
Even if I know I shouldn’t let some guy determine my worth…
I want it. Why can’t a girl like me have it even if it’s an illusion?
Cody’s silent when I stop in front of the door. Hasn’t he noticed that I haven’t gone inside yet? Isn’t he going to kiss me?
Doubts attack me so swiftly, it’s like they were lying in wait the entire time. What if he doesn’t like me at all? If he did, he would have triedsomething. We’re in college. My roommate hooked up with that greasy guy at the sushi restaurant yesterday because he gave her free dumplings. And she didn’t even know him.
Everyone is doing a lot more than kissing on the steps with a guy they went on several wonderful dates with. If Cody’s not making a move… doesn’t that mean he isn’t interested in me?
My eyelashes flutter down. I’ve been preparing myself to accept the fact that Cody doesn’t really like me, but the way my heart pangs in my chest says that Ididexpect something from him.
And maybe I like him more than I originally allowed myself to.
Who wouldn’t?
Cody’s handsome, smart and ambitious. He treats me like I’m the only girl in the room.
That means something.
I’ve seen the way girls watch him whenever he passes by. He’s tall. Charismatic. Good looking. He could have anyone and he chose me.
Which is insane.
Even more insane is that he really is a nice guy. I thought a hotshot who attracted all that attention would be arrogant and self-absorbed, but Cody is humble and earnest. The way he talks about his future business, his dreams and goals, it’s so attractive.
Maybe that’s it? Maybe he doesn’t findmeattractive? Maybe that’s why we’re awkwardly standing on the steps. His lips nowhere near mine.
“Goodnight,” I say, fumbling around with my keys.
“Goodnight,” Cody answers in a husky voice.
His eyes dip to my lips and that beautiful slash of a mouth eases toward mine. My heart pounding like a drum, I close my eyes and tilt my head up in anticipation.
Finally.
Finally…
“Oh, damn. Sorry. Excuse me.” Joey, the annoying guy in the room down the hall, shuffles past us. He gives Cody a thumbs-up. “Right on, brother.”
Pervert.
I step back, annoyed by the interruption.
Cody looks frustrated too. His jaw clenches and he stares at the door as if he’s contemplating following Joey in and swinging at him.
Instead, he shakes his head. “I’ll uh… you… um… goodnight.”
That’s it?
My eyes widen as Cody gives me his back and shuffles down the path. He runs a hand through his hair and seems to be muttering to himself.
I roll my lips together, contemplating my next move. The smart thing would be to go inside, build more defenses around my heart, and not get any closer to the prince on campus.
But my feet won’t move.
I stare at Cody’s back as he gets further away.