Page 31

“New room?” I repeated. I looked at him doubtfully. “I’ve been here twenty times. I promise, there’s absolutely no such thing.”

CHAPTER 31

I followed Jordan down the hall and around the corner to Room 5A.

“Here we are,” he said as brightly as if he were some kind of tour guide. He knocked, then pushed open the door. “Good morning,” he said to whoever was inside. “Come on in, Hannah.”

I sighed, straightened my shoulders, and walked into a room I was sure I’d stayed in before. Then again, theydidall look exactly the same, so who could really tell?

“OMG, look at you! You could be Lily Collins’s twin sister, and I can already tell that we’re going to be great friends.”

This baffling sentence was spoken by the curvy redhead sitting cross-legged on one of the room’s twin beds. She had a heart-shaped face, bright blue eyes, and—I could already tell—way too much energy for this place. Forme.

“Hannah, this is Sophie,” Jordan said. “Sophie, meet Hannah. You guys are going to be roommates for the, uh, foreseeable future.”

“Hi,” I said, barely even politely. Just because I hated being locked in the quiet room didn’t mean I was interested in a psychiatric institution slumber party. And if I had to have a roommate, why couldn’t it be Michaela? We understood each other’s issues,and we gave each other space. Plus sometimes her grandma sent her care packages of brownies and Doritos. Since she never wanted to eat them, she’d give them all to me.

I fell facedown onto my new-old bed. “I don’t know who Lily Collins is,” I said into the pillow.

The other bed creaked as Sophie bounced up and down. “Really?Emily in Paris?Les Misérables?”

I rolled over onto my back and stared up at the ceiling. The only thing uglier than a bare hospital wall was the fluorescent light and acoustic tile of a hospital ceiling. I remembered the second or third time I’d come to Belman, when one of the patients ripped out a bunch of those tiles because he thought they contained hidden microphones.They’re listening!he’d screamed.They’re always listening!

When a nurse asked himwhowas listening, he’d shaken his head. He was too scared to say. He thought they’d come and kill him.

“Hello? Yoohoo!” Sophie said. “Have you ever had Yoo-hoo, by the way? It is so, so gross, but our doorman drinks it by the case. Pretty soon all his teeth are going to fall out.”

Aaaaand … the only thing worse than being stuffed into the quiet room was being forced to share your sleeping quarters with someone who can’t shut her mouth.

“Lily Collins is also Phil Collins’s daughter, but I’d excuse you for not knowing who that is,” Sophie went on. “Maybe your parents know his music.”

“I sawLes Misthe musical,” Jordan offered, either trying to help break the ice or else get Sophie to be quiet for one second. “Have you, Hannah?”

“I’ve read thebook,” I said. “It’s by Victor Hugo. Incidentally, Hugo’s daughter was committed to an insane asylum. Supposedly she was driven mad by unrequited love.”

The way I might be driven mad by my new roommate!

Sophie flicked her hair over her shoulder. “That’s fascinating, but it doesn’t tell you who Lily Collins is,” she said. “I’d show you her IMDb page, but they took my phone away, so I guess your ignorance will persist. Very few people know as many things as I do, anyway. I don’t know why I forget this sometimes. Your minds aren’t as powerful as mine is, and I feel sorry for you. But I also feel a lot of love for you—I have love for everybody, even the people I hate.”

I stifled a sudden laugh. Sophie’s rapid-fire monologue was giving me a headache, but she was funny. Was she as messed up as everyone thought I was? Only time would tell. I wouldn’t ask her what she was here for, of course. That was rude. But Indy—who, like me, was a frequent flyer at Belman Psych—would.

What are you, he’d go,a suicide risk or something?And, as if asking wasn’t enough already, he’d do it at the top of his lungs. He got in trouble for stuff like that, but he didn’t care. Indy liked pissing people off. “It’s one of the symptoms of my mental illness,” he’d say. I wasn’t really sure that was true, though. It might’ve just been an excuse to be a dick.

“I haven’t slept in three days,” Sophie went on. “Maybe four or six. Sleep is for plebeians.” She got up and began pacing from the window to the door and back again. “I bought ten thousand dollars’ worth of handbags on The RealReal because I’m going to start my own high-end retail shop in Bushwick. Then my mom said I had to finish high school, which is ridiculous because myschool’s just a holding pen for rich assholes before they go off to a college where they can become frat brothers with even more rich assholes. I’m rich, too—well, my parents are, I only have like two million to my name—but I promise I’m not an asshole. I can tell I’m talking a lot, I’m aware of that. But I have so much to say and all of it is interesting! Because of my prodigious memory I know a lot of good jokes, and everyone says I’m the most charming person they’ve ever met—”

“You two have group therapy in half an hour,” Jordan interrupted her. “Hannah, do you want to show Sophie around before that?”

“Do I look like a tour guide?” I asked him.

“You look like Lily Collins, we’ve already established that,” Sophie said. “I mean, if Lily Collins stopped showering and got her clothes out of a Kohl’s dumpster. But I know we’re going to be friends! I don’t know about the other people in this place, though. I think I will only like you. You have beautiful cheekbones. Have you ever used filler? My mom says I’m too young but everyone at school does it. I want a Botox lip flip like Marilynn O’Connor. She’s a senior, and everyone says she had sex with Harry Styles—”

“Anyway,” Jordan said, “see you guys later.” He gave us a wave and raced down the hall.

I couldn’t exactly blame him.

“Are you voluntary?” I asked. The question was bordering on rude, but I was curious.

Sophie shook her head. “My mom made me come here. I mean, I did threaten to kill her, but I didn’t mean it.” She was still walking back and forth; I could hear her hurried footsteps. “I know I could ride this out—I’m very powerful. But she’s driving me crazy.If it weren’t for her everything would be really wonderful, I think. Being here is, like, R&R or whatever—some time apart. I’ll be out in a day, after everyone here sees that my mind is incredible and I have perfect clarity and self-awareness.”