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Jessie didn’t look like she was buying it.
Raye didn’t either.
“He’s into you and he’s a throwback to the Stone Age when it comes to women,” Luna wrongly assumed. “So I get that, a, he’s not a fan of you putting yourself in danger, even if you weren’t in danger. Throwbacks assess danger differently than we do in the current millennium.” Once she delivered that, she continued wrongly assuming. “And b, he wasn’t all that fired up about seeing you on a date, even if you weren’t on a real one.”
“I’m not sure he’s into me,” I continued to only semi-share.
“Oh please, not this again,” Luna replied.
This was an ongoing thing among me and my girls. They’d thought the sparks flew too when Javi and I met, and they wanted me to do something about it.
Naturally, considering Javi and my most recent past, I wasn’t going to discuss it, so I didn’t say anything.
But I was in a bad spot.
Javi was a member of our gang. He was Jessie’s brother’s best friend. He was at Mace and Stella’s Super Bowl party. He drank Guiness with us at the Dubliner on St. Patrick’s Day. He floated in Eric’s pool with a margarita at Eric and Jessie’s Memorial Day party. He regularly came into SC for coffees from Tex or one of Lucia’s fantastic lunch specials.
Specifically, Jess was pretty tight with him. He’d saved her brother. Got him back on his meds. Got him the therapy he needed.
I couldn’t tell them what he thought of me. They’d all be big-time pissed at him and it’d cause a huge thing.
I had to find a way to go back to how it used to be, with us circling each other, him avoiding me (now I knew why) and me avoiding him (now that might be easier…eventually).
They all thought he was the bee’s knees.
Because he was…to them.
“I’ve never seen you cry in the midst of a Fume,” Jessie noted.
“There’s a first time for everything,” I said.
“That must have been some convo,” Shanti observed, and now she was watching me skeptically as well.
But yeah.
Our convo was something.
“Hopefully, whatever it is will get you two to stop dancing around each other,” Luna stated. “That shit has to stop.”
“Says the pot to the kettle,” Raye replied.
Luna’s cheeks started to get pink.
“For the last time, there’s nothing going on between Knox and me,” she snapped.
“Girls, girls, let’s focus,” Shanti suggested. She looked at me. “You need more time for your snit or you wanna clean up so we can debrief?”
“I’m digging your commitment to the cause, my sister,” Luna said.
Shanti smiled at her.
“I’m over my snit,” I said. “I’ll just get rid of these falsies and heels, and I’ll be out. There’s a bottle of white in the fridge. Help yourselves.”
Jessie gave me one last, lingering look, so I shot her a fake sunny smile. Unfortunately, that made her look linger longer. Therefore, I skedaddled to the bathroom.
I took one look at my face and nearly passed out, glad I started crying after Javi left.
Sure, he clearly didn’t like me (at all), but no girl wants a man to see her with one false eyelash clinging on for dear life and rivers of mascara down her cheeks with puddles around her eyes.