Page 136

twenty

Dead Eyes and Sad Goodbyes

Silas

"Iwas always going to win, Noah," Tate says. "You should have known better."

"Noah! He doesn't—"

I don't finish the sentence before she leaves.

"What is wrong with you? What are you doing?"

Tate shrugs. "What do you mean? I'm just being honest with her."

"Tate, you can't…"

"Can't what?" he challenges.

You can't do this to me again.I'm not exactly sure if I can say that—if it'll make things better or worse, so I don't.

Eggshells. It's always eggshells when it comes to Tate and Noah. I know she hurt him, but I know he loves her, too, and he'slying.Hasn't he hurt her back enough?

He looks away, unaffected, and pours whiskey into a dirty coffee mug while absentmindedly scratching at the stab wound on his shoulder. Like he really doesn't give a fuck.

"We can't leave her. You don't really want to leave her."

He turns, looking me dead in theeye. "Yeah, I do."

I jump off the bed and chase after her, shooting Tate a glare over my shoulder, but he shrugs it off like it's nothing. I catch up to her before she rounds the front of the building.

"Hey, wait a second," I say, grabbing her by the arm. It's not so much that she stops for me as it is that she gives up. And that's what I hear in her tone—resignation, like she's given up.

I back her into the side of the building, placing my hands on her shoulders, and find her eyes in the dark. "He doesn't mean it," I tell her.

She sighs, her eyes welling with tears. "Yes, he does, Silas."

"Come back inside. We'll talk, okay?"

"I'm not going back in there. I never want to see him again. I'm not letting him dothisto meeveragain."

"I'll talk to him. I'll tell him it's too much, and he'll…he'll tell you he doesn't mean it."

"Silas…" she says, shaking her head. "You're wrong."

"No, I'm not. Just stay here. Just for a minute, okay? Maybe five minutes. Don't leave." I take off my hoodie and pull it over her head, knowing she must be cold in a t-shirt, and rub my hands up and down her arms to warm her. "Promise you'll stay right here."

"It won't…"

"It's that, or I drag you back inside."

She wipes her own eyes with the heels of her hands. "Okay, Silas."

"Okay." I lean in and kiss her lips. "Thank you. Don't move, okay?"

Nervously, I leave her there, glancing over my shoulder before I step inside the room, attempting to gauge whether she's just going to leave when I close the door.

But she looks at me like she'll stay, and I know where to find her; I copied her house key. That makes me feel a bit better about pulling the door closed behind me.