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“I appreciate it all.”

He looks down at me. “You’re nervous.”

Wow, maybe I am transparent. I swallow down my glass of whiskey and set it on the table. “This is the first time we’ve ever done this. Like a real date. I’m just… I don’t… I’m scared…” I trail off not able to find the right words.

Kilian sets his glass down on the table and pulls me closer to him. “It’s just us, Bella. You and me. I wanted to take you out so many times back in Dublin but I knew you didn’t want that. You were young and carefree. You wanted that freedom that anyone your age would want. And I was fine with our relationship the way it was.”

“You know I wasn’t as carefree as you thought.”

He looks down at me, humor etched on his face. “I didn’t know you were a mob daughter at the time.”

I laugh. “True.” I pause as I take in the beauty of the sea in front of us, the way the sunlight dances across the water. “I wanted more with you back then but I was too scared to admit it to myself much less you. And I was hiding such a big secret from you and I knew there was nothing I could do. There was no way we could be…”

“Like this?” he asks, finishing my sentence.

I nod. “We always understood each other on the deepest level. But I knew I could never let you into my heart.”

“What about now?” he asks me.

I take a deep breath to admit the truth I wish I’d told him ten years ago. “I think I let you into my heart back then and you never left. When I disappeared, I left you with a piece of my heart I never thought I would get back, but now that I am with you, I feel like this is right. Us. Together.”

“Is that why you are nervous?”

I shrug.That and the fact I still haven’t told you Aria is your daughter.

“It’s just us, Bella. Don’t be nervous.” I nod before he continues. “And just so you know, I think you’ve always had a piece of my heart too.”

“Anam cara,” I say softly.

“Forever,” he answers.

We spend the rest of the night enjoying ourselves in a way we never let ourselves before. Pretending we are a real couple, laughing, dancing, enjoying the freedom that comes on a boat in the middle of the Mediterranean. We don’t think about our families or the reasons we could never be together. It is just the two of us, dancing under starlight.

19

MIRABELLA

Inever showed up to the docks that night to be a distraction. I talked to Kilian about it on the boat and he told me not to go. He was worried for my safety. It’s been three weeks since then and I still haven’t heard from Dante. I don’t know if it was another one of Giancarlo’s stupid tests or what. But I still worry what may come of me not following their orders. Kilian ensured me that he would have someone watching me, making sure my safety was a priority.

And now I am back to looking over my shoulder every day. I worry about Aria. I worry about Dante following through on his threats. But Kilian assured me nothing would happen to my daughter. And every time he gives me that reassurance I know I should tell him the truth. But I can’t tell him over text that he is a dad. I need to tell him in person. But it’s too dangerous, too risky to meet up with him.

I take a deep breath as I grab my purse and umbrella to head to work. It’s pouring outside today and I know it’s going to be a slow day. Not many people will be out and about in the rain. I almost wish I could stay home and do nothing for once.

I am about to leave when I feel the vibration of my burner phone in my purse. I always keep it with me now. Kilian and I text every day. And every night he sends me dirty texts that have me wishing he was in my bed.

Kilian: Happy Birthday

Bella: You remember?

I hadn’t said anything about my birthday coming up. I don’t really care that much anyway. I know Magda will give me some cash like she does every year. I’ll order in dinner and have cake with Aria then watch a movie with her.

Kilian: I remember everything.

I blush at that. God, this man. I never blush. Ever. Yet he has been the only man in my entire life to bring a flush to my cheeks.

Bella: Well thank you

Kilian: I wish I could be there. I would give you a birthday present you would remember for the rest of your life.