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I nod. “Bastian, my good friend, his brother would have been killed for screwing The Partners over. Bastian had gotten out, one of the few who had, but he turned himself in to save his brother and the woman he loved. I couldn’t let him lose everything for something I dragged him into to begin with. So I gave my life to them. And I’ve been paying for it every day since.”

She crawls up the bed and straddles me, grasping my cheeks with both her hands. “Most men wouldn’t sacrifice their lives for others. In my family, they kill to keep secrets, even their own family. You are an honorable man, Kilian.”

I shake my head. “I’m not. I got them involved—”

“We all make poor decisions. We all do things we regret. But if we find a way to redeem ourselves then that cancels out the bad we did.”

I brush a loose piece of hair out of her face. “You are something else, Bella.”

“I’m just a girl running from her own life.”

I shake my head. “No, you are a woman living the life you always wanted.”

A sad smile crosses her face. “Almost.” I want to ask her what she means by that but then she asks another question. “So what about now? Do you want out? Can you get out? What do you want for your future?”

I chuckle. “That’s a lot of questions.”

“I’m a curious woman.”

I sigh, letting myself be completely honest with her. “I don’t know. Parts of me want it. Want the power. Other parts wish I could live a different life.”

“I’m not one to judge you if you want to lead a criminal organization.”

I smile at her. “You are probably the only woman who would say that.”

She smiles at me and my heart clenches. “What is the different life you want?”

“I met this woman once who made me question things, made me think there was more out there than the life I was born into. I thought maybe we could have it all. But then she disappeared and I couldn’t help but wonder if there was something better out there.”

A blush hits her cheeks. “Must have been a pretty special woman.”

I pull her up onto my chest so we are face to face. “She is.”

A tear falls from her dark eyes. “But you know it can’t—”

“Shh,” I say, cutting her off. “Let’s just be us while we can.”

A sad smile crosses her lips. “Okay.”

“Do you have to leave tomorrow?”

She nods. “Aria is with a friend and I need to go home.”

“Can that friend watch her another night?”

“Kilian…” She trails off but her answer is written all over her face.

I should know I can’t compete with her daughter but I try anyway. “Please give me one more day, Bella. It’s been ten years since I’ve felt this way. Please just give me one more night. I need one more night with you.”

She bites her lip but then presses those lush lips to mine. When she pulls back, I’m surprised by her answer. “Okay.”

16

MIRABELLA

It’s been two weeks since I went to Malta and I have been in a daze ever since. I can still feel Kilian between my thighs. The way he fucked me thoroughly, like he was making up for ten years of lost time. Because that’s what it was. We had our own little bubble in Malta. Where I was just Bella and he was just Kilian. It felt like being in his townhome in Dublin.

I miss Dublin. And not just because of him. I miss the green hills and the cliffs and the people. He told me I tasted like home. Well he is home to me. He reminds me of everything that felt good and right in the world. Before we knew who we really were. When we were just happy between the sheets. Young and free. I always worried that he wouldn’t want me because I was so much younger than him all those years ago but I should have known that what we had isn’t something you can find with just anyone.