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But I know better. She wouldn’t be asking unless she had a reason to.“Why? Have you seen anyone lurking about?”

“The one who kissed you.”

I stare out at the window. If she meant Cole, she would have referred to him as the Red One, as she always did. My heart skips a beat. There’s no telling what Darian was capable of. I’ve only seen him in combat with humans, but I don’t doubt he could be vicious against a dragon.

“Daeja, if he sees you, I want you to fly as fast as you can—”

“How many times do I have to tell you I’m not leaving without you?”

“Then you come to me, and I will meet you. And we will go north together. But stay out of sight—”

“I know. I know. He didn’t see me last night. I was across the lake, hidden by the trees. But I could smell him.”

“What was he doing?”

“I don’t know. I couldn’t tell. It almost looked like he was carrying something. But I left before he could spot me.”

My eyes narrow. What would Darian be doing stalking around the lake at night?

“Did you see him after I left you?”

“Yes.”

Which meant he must have gone right after Celeste knocked on his door and he told her to leave.

As if the extra distance between Daeja and I wasn’t already reason enough to feel uneasy. Tension strains every muscle in my body, like the string of a bow pulled tight.

Studying the room, an idea sparks me. Given Celeste’s father was the previous military general, I suspected there was more than just dragon horns hiding in this massive estate. He had to at least have a map of sorts. Or, at least, I had to try and look for one.

“I’ll check in with you later tonight. I’m going to try and look for a map here.”

“Be careful. Stay out of sight. If they see you, I want you to run as fast as your two little legs will carry you…”

I laugh at her half-hearted mock.

“Just remember. Even if you’re trapped, we don’t eat two leggers.”

“Thank you for clearing up my confusion.”

An hour later, and I’ve brushed through my hair and slipped on the midnight blue gown Celeste picked out for me earlier today. I stare at myself in the ornate gold mirror perched on the bathroom counter for a long time. This was what I wished for all those years ago: balls, fancy dresses, the finest wines, friends, and handsome men.

Men…my mind slips to Cole, even as I dig my heels into the ground to keep from going there. But thinking of him is as natural as breathing. Despite my every effort to shut my heart off from him, I can’t seem to take back what he took of me. I shouldn’t be thinking about him. He’sengaged.And even worse, engaged to a woman who has been nothing but kind to me, contrary to her impossible brother. An impossible brother that won’t even show up for his‘half’sister’s engagement dinner party.

I’d bet even if he came to such a ball, he wouldn’t bother to dress up. I can imagine him strolling into the ballroom, his brown hair stupidly bedraggled, muddied boots leaving debris with each step, still dressed in casual black fighting leathers. My thoughts tumble to what he might look like outside of the rugged wear he sports at the outpost.

What he looks like when he isn’t wearing anything at all. Naked and sweating.

I audibly gasp at the thought and smack myself.Stop thinking about Darian.

Clearly, I need a lesson or two on self-discipline.I convince myself it’s only a need leading me to think of him. A desire of my flesh, a dull roaring fire I try to keep locked up. I can’t give in to such a thing again. And I won’t give him the satisfaction of thinking about him...no matter how skilled he may be in bed. And no matter the sheer intensity of the emotions he summons within me.

But there’s a part of me which wonders why my mind travels to him. I tell myself it’s the thought that, no matter how awful I feel about sleeping with him, there’s someone out there that’s done worse. Thatisworse. One with no remorse—and at least I have that. Darian isn’t up every night with guilt and shame clawing at his insides like a trapped animal begging to be freed. My stomach roils in guilt from the reminder of what I’ve done.Despite Cole’s betrayal, did it make me any worse that I flipped so quickly into Darian’s bed?

I blow out a breath before I walk out of my room. A soft lull of music drifts down the winding hallways, calling me forward like invisible fingers. I follow the sound, down several corridors, and through a massive arched doorway spanning high above my head.

I walk out onto a platform, and a set of stairs dips off into the room on my left. The room opens up to a wide expanse of marbled floors. Beams and columns stretch across overhead, intersecting and stretching into diamonds patterning the ceiling. Brilliant bursts of light flicker from ornate crystal chandeliers hung from the ceiling. A dull roar of multiple conversations lulls underneath the music. People crowd near a long table lined with dinnerware and crystal glasses shimmering with liquid. Off to the right, a man plays at a large ornate piano. I suddenly feel so out of place—perhaps coming here was a mistake. I should’ve tried searching for the map first. But any temptation to turn and run before someone sees me disappears.

Because it’s too late.