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They opened slowly as the car approached, and she thought she might be blinded by the gleaming brightness of the palace before them.
“I’ve never seen anything so beautiful,” she said.
“Yes,” he said, his voice filled with wonder, as if he had never truly considered it before. “It is quite beautiful.”
“You grew up here?”
He nodded. “Yes I did. It was a wonderful place to be a child. So close to the ocean. And, of course, even in bad weather—which we rarely have here—there are so many places to run and hide inside the palace. A small boy’s dream.”
They would have small children. It was an overwhelming thing to think about. She still hadn’t quite accepted that she… That she’d said yes.
But it was just too compelling of an offer to refuse, especially in light of what her father had said to her. But almost even more so, was the reality that if she didn’t marry him, someone else would. If she didn’t have his babies, then there would be another princess in line to do so. And part of her, a petty, feminine part of her that she had never known existed before, simply couldn’t cope with that.
He had chosen her, and part of her felt renewed by that. Proud of it. She felt… Well, she felt special. And maybe that was ridiculous. Because she still wasn’t 100 percent entirely clear on why he had chosen her, but it was no matter. He had.
He had chosen her, and something about that soothed something inside of her that she hadn’t known was wounded.
Because she took care of her family out of necessity. She hadn’t been selected to do it because she was especially strong, especially brave or especially special.
She had been thrust into that position. Because there was no one else. Because of her age.
She was important, but it really had nothing to do with her. She had risen to it. To the challenge. But… She wondered very much if she truly mattered at all. And that was a difficult thing to contend with. She didn’t often think like that. But he could’ve chosen anyone.
Or, you just happened to be the person he got in a plane crash with, and you saved his life.
At least it was something she had done.
Like crash the plane?
She was getting annoyed with that little voice inside of her. Because it was being a snarly jerk.
When they pulled up to the front of the palace, her door was opened for her immediately. There were ten attendants there just suddenly. And everyone looked happy to see her.
“You are Stevie Parker,” one of the women said, walking forward, the expression on her face elated. “My name is Miriam. I’m going to be your lady’s maid. We are so excited to have you here. So excited that you’re marrying the Prince.”
“Oh,” she said.
She hadn’t even given a thought to the fact that people might know about the arrangement.
“Of course the staff knows,” he said. “It has not been announced yet to the broader world, but it will be soon. Everyone here keeps the strict confidence of the royal family.”
“Indeed,” said one of the men. “I’m Johannes. I’m the advisor to the Prince, and will also act as concierge for you, should you need anything from outside the palace.”
“He’s very good at his job,” said Adonis.
And as she was swept into the palace, she felt it was not dissimilar to how it had felt when the plane was falling out of the sky. And her thought then had been that she was very regretful that she was dying without being taken care of.
But here… Here she was being taken care of. Being offered whatever she wanted? A lady’s maid?
And she felt guilty. Guilty that there was part of her that was enjoying this. Guilty that there was part of her that even wanted it.
Because it made her feel soft and silly. Like she was doing this for herself, and not for everyone else. She had told him that it was because she was tired, but was she? Was she simply self-indulgent?
She had been. She had been when she had slept with him when they had been stranded out there. She had done such a terrible job of reining in her baser desires. The desire for softness. The desire to be coddled. The desire to be held.
All of that was coming up now.
Had he made her so addicted to his touch, to his general pleasure seeking, that she had so easily given in to this? And she had told herself that it was all in aid of being a bigger help to her family?