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“As long as you do, we will too,” Daemon says.

“Well, that’s not fair,” I frown.

“Maybe... Maybe not… But it will get you to rest,” he grins.

“Get some rest,” Dad says, chuckling. “Call us later.”

We walk them to the door to see everyone out. I feel bad not getting to know my brother’s new mates more, but I just don’t have it in me to do it right now. I hardly even know my family, but I have plenty of time to get to know everyone.

Once everyone is gone, I go upstairs with my mates. I assume our stuff has made it here, but even if not, we still have clothes here. I go straight to the bathroom and turn the shower on. I need to cleanse myself of the horrors from the last week. I don’t know if I will ever feel clean again. I was used and abused over and over. I was made to bleed in so many different ways.

I keep feeling as though I left a piece of myself behind when we walked out of that room. It’s not until I step under the scalding hot water that I realize that I did in fact leave a part of myself behind. I left all of my fear and weakness behind. I left behind the woman who chose to be blind to her abuse rather than fighting. I will never be her again. I will never choose to be blissfully ignorant to the horrific truth of my lifelong trauma again. I spent my entire life just trying to survive.

Brenna did her best to keep us out of harm’s way, but it never stopped the evil from seeping into our lives. It didn’t stop the stranger from groping me on the train at thirteen. It didn’t stop the men from catcalling me at sixteen, knowing I was a child. No matter how hard someone tries to protect you, there is no way to stop evil from happening. The people who wish to do harm will still do harm no matter if it’s to you or someone else. If it wasn’t me that was assigned to Zypher, it would have been any number of girls to get raped for hours on end by countless men while he laughed at their tears. Someone with a looser grip on their sanity could have been subjected to his torture, and maybe they wouldn’t have survived the way I did. Maybe they would have remained blissfully ignorant and unaware of their trauma. So, why me? Why did Zypher want me? Maybe it was because he loved to see how far I would bend without breaking, or maybe it was because he wanted what he could never have.

The prophecy only stated that I would be mated with the kings and a war would come. It never said who would win or if I would survive. I did that. I survived. I won the war. Sure, it started over issues that began over three hundred years ago. The tipping point was me, though. Me becoming mated to the Three Kings and us fighting for peace and equality together sent my abusers into a spiral. They tried to take me down with them, but I survived.

My mates step into the shower with me, and it takes me back to the time they washed me after we mated for the first time. This time is no different. They take their time washing me and themselves. Washing away everything from the last week. Having them wash away the abuse left behind in my body is a level of comfort that I never knew existed. I grew accustomed to taking care of myself after one of Zypher’s numerous attacks. No matter if it was just him or his entire pack and visiting packs, the emotions were always the same. I felt like nothing more than a toy for him to play with. I knew that he wouldn’t play with me nonstop, but when it did, it would feel like forever. Being alone in the shower after… loneliness would set in and it’s the only time I allowed myself to cry for the life I dreamed of having. Being here with my mates while they wash me only brings me solace. It shows me that sometimes those dreams we cry over while we are alone in the shower sometimes do come true.

Chapter Fifty One

Lilith

Three Days Later

Overthelastthreedays, my mates and I have spent every moment just existing together. After our long and much-needed shower, we went to bed and lay together in silence. There wasn’t much to say that hadn’t already been said. We just needed to be together. We spent all three days either in bed talking or on the couch watching movies. We handed off all of our responsibilities to the council and saw not one.

Last night I called Leli to let her know that we plan on coming to City Hall for the council meeting and our first official public appearance since I was crowned. I am more excited than I am nervous. So much so that I wake up before the guys. I go downstairs to let Thuly run around and be weird outside for a bit before I come back in and feed him. He has taken a liking to simple raw meat rather than whole people. He also loves fruits and vegetables. I did some research on his species, and it turns out that he is sensitive to evil and attracted to peace. They will only ever imprint on a being that is peaceful but will devour evil. I’m curious how he didn’t pick up on Fermin.

I go back upstairs and tiptoe past the bed to get to the bathroom to get dressed. At the last second, hands wrap around my waist and pull me back onto the mattress. “You snuck out,” Kael says as he pins me to the bed, straddling my body.

“I let Thuly bounce around the courtyard,” I laugh.

“You get a pass this time,” he says as he leans down and kisses me softly.

“I thought you all were asleep,” I say.

“We were until we heard the bedroom door close,” Daemon says.

“So you just laid in bed together and waited on me?” I ask.

“Yeah, basically,” Callum laughs.

“Can I get up, or do you have me pinned for a reason?” I ask.

“Well, I was going to let you up. I think I’ll play with you now,” Kael says with a wicked grin.

“We have to get ready and meet the council,” I laugh. “You can play with me tonight.”

“Deal,” he says as he kisses me again.

He lets me up, and we get dressed for the day. I feel more confident going into public put-together rather than looking disheveled like I was when we first got free.

When we are ready, we load up Thuly and drive to City Hall. Upon arrival, we see that there is a massive crowd already forming. They know we plan on meeting with the council first, but they all seem excited to see us when we pull up. Vash, Leli, and Draik meet us so we can get inside without being stopped. People keep their distance but cheer for us as we walk into the building.

“It’s good to see you, Lilith,” Draik says with a smile.

“You too, Draik. I’m happy to see you came to a council meeting,” I say.