Page 32 of Making It Up

Probably too quickly.

“Do you want to sleep with her?” Jack asks.

“No.”

I definitely say that too quickly.

Carver and Charlie exchange a look.

“I can’t,” I say instead. Because…yeah, fine. Saying I don’t want to do either of those things is going to be a hard sell with these guys.

“Why?” Jack asks.

My brother has been away from Sapphire Falls for about ten years. He was off at college, getting married, having kids. Losing his wife. He’s had a few other things on his mind than keeping up with the who’s who in Sapphire Falls.

“She’s Scott Hansen’s daughter,” I say simply.

Jack lets that sink in.

My brother has been seemingly moving in slow motion since his wife’s death. He’s moved in with our mom and dad, which is great because he has help with the kids and doesn’t have to worry about things like bills, shopping, yard work, and keeping up with housework. It seems like Jack’s having a hard time even doing the basics, like going to work and being present for his kids.

So, I give him a minute to think over what I just said.

Finally, he nods. “That could be complicated.”

“Right.”

I’ve been thinking about it ever since Mia and I left Tim’s basement the other night. I just don’t see a way to date Mia without it being awkward. Scott and I would have to see each other eventually. We would have to address our past. I’d have to be willing to forgive him for keeping me off the police force, for not caring about me—a kid who really needed help from an authority figure—back when he could have made a difference.

Should I be over it by now? Should I realize that even Scott Hansen is human and just move on? Maybe. But I’ve pushed Scott and my feelings about him to the side and ignored them so that I can live and work in this town. I don’t know if I want to dig around in there again.

My brothers don’t know every nuance of every feeling I have toward Scott. My therapist is the only one who’s really heard it all.

And Mia.

But they know that I don’t like Scott and vice versa.

“So, I should probably go,” I say, setting my beer down and getting up.

It’s stupid, but it feels too hard to be here tonight with her here, looking amazing, and tempting, and already on my mind far too much.

I don’t come to the bar every night or even three times a week, but I’m a regular. Mia isn’t. I can only hope that she and her friends are here tonight because of the band and that I won’t run into her a lot in the future.

“No, come on,” Charlie protests. “The band is going on soon. Just stay. This is a night out for us. It’s not about them.”

He casts a glance in that direction. Whitney is looking over. I see her arch her eyebrows. My brother quickly turns back to our table.

I might not be a “real “cop, but I’ve got training. And I’m still out making sure people are following the rules and doing things right.

Often, they’re not.

I’m lied to a lot.

I have a very good sense for when people are trying to pull something over on me.

“Charlie,” I say.

He looks at Carver. Carver shakes his head.