Page 115 of Making It Up

His shoulders drop, and his expression softens. “Honestly, it wasn’t about you being bad at the job. It was the job being bad for you.”

I feel that impact in my chest. My ribs feel tight, and my heart thumps against them as if trying to escape the squeeze. “What do you mean?”

He takes another breath and blows it out. “I wanted you to be happy. I wanted you to do something that would be good for you. Something that would make you happy and proud, but that would spare you pain.”

I take that in. “You think being a cop would’ve been hard on me?”

“For sure. I know you wanted to work in a small town, but, David, it can be hard here, too. When shit goes sideways and bad things happen, we’re called in. In a small town, it can be worse because those bad things are happening to people we know and care about.” He lifts his hands, then lets them fall. “The last thing I wanted was for you to show up at the scene of a shooting—intentional or accidental—and have it be someone that you knew and cared about. And have it turn out badly.”

My chest tightens even further.

I wasn’t there when my mother was shot, of course. I never saw the scene. But I had imagined it many times over the years. Of course, I never want to see a scene like that with someone I know.

“And you know that we’re also called in for medical emergencies.”

I wet my lips, my mouth suddenly dry.

Emergency response includes the fire department, the EMTs, and yes, the cops.

“I didn’t want you to have to be the one who responded when someone passed away at home.”

My dad had passed away at home. I had been there when it happened. Delaney and my brothers had all been there. That had helped. I was glad I’d been there, but wow, it had sucked.

The hours after are still a blur, even this many years later, but I do remember people in uniforms coming to the house.

“You’ve had to do that?” My throat feels like I’ve swallowed sand.

He nods. “Yeah. Of course. We’re there to help and support in all kinds of situations, especially in a town like this. And I’m happy to do it. I’m proud to do it. But it’s hard. I just didn’t think you should have to do that. Not when there were other ways to take care of people and serve the community and be happy. I saw you, David, and I knew that Game and Parks would be perfect for you.”

I swallow hard. Then I have to swallow again. “You were protecting me.”

“Trying to. And I hated that it made you angry with me. But if it protected you and saved you from some pain, it was worth it.”

I swallow again and take a deep breath. “I’ve spent years thinking that you didn’t care. That you quit trying because you were sick of me. And that you talked me out of being a cop because you didn’t want to work with me.”

I see the pain on his face at my confession, but he takes a deep breath and nods. “I guess I can see that. I’m really damned sorry. I didn’t know that. I knew we had tension. I figured you were pissed because I had pushed your family into holding that intervention.”

I give a short laugh. “I needed that intervention. If I’d known you were the one pushing for it, I probably would’ve appreciated it. Eventually.”

“So we’ve had a sincere lack of communication.”

“Very much so,” I agree nodding. “That really sucks.”

“It does. But you ended up where you needed to be. Where we all needed you to be. Sapphire Falls, this whole area, is lucky to have you doing what you do. And you’re happy. I’m grateful for that.”

I am happy. I can’t deny that. “Yeah, I am, Scott. I really am.”

He nods, looking relieved, and I realize he needed to hear me say that.

“We’ve just missed out on working together. Cooperatively anyway,” I say. “I’m sorry for that.”

“There’s a lot of time ahead. We can work together a lot from here on out.”

I smile. It’s going to take me some time to process all of this fully, but I already feel lighter. “I’d like that, Scott,” I clear my throat. “Thank you for this. Whatever made you finally tell me, I really appreciate it.”

“Yeah. Of course. I should’ve said it a long time ago. There was just something about talking to Mia about it that made things click. I suddenly realized there was a lot more to the story that you should know.”

Hearing her name makes my heart squeeze.