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It was just on the edge of too much, and that meant I could ride the crest of the wave for what felt likeages. I knew, in a vague sort of way, that I was alternately babbling nonsense and begging formore, deeper, harder. Zalen’s lips and teeth nipped marks into my skin wherever he could reach. I probably should have cared that there would be no hiding them without full stage makeup paired with a turtleneck.
I didn’t.
When my orgasm came, it took me by surprise like a two-by-four to the back of the head. I shrieked, clawing at Zalen’s back, and was rewarded with two more sloppy strokes followed by a guttural groan as the alpha spilled inside me, his knot swelling.
I whimpered, the fresh stretch filling the last needy, grasping space inside me, until I was full to overflowing. The bite marks peppering my body ached deliciously, throbbing in time with my slowing heartbeat.
“I’ve got you,” Zalen murmured, rolling us so I was draped on top of him like a limp dishrag. “That’s it, beautiful. I’ve got you.”
“Got you back,” I mumbled, as my body clamped around his like a jealous dragon guarding its hoard.
Zalen chuckled tiredly, the sound tailing off to a rough alpha purr. I let it vibrate through my chest, soothing my troubled heart. The welcome, trancelike peace of being knotted untangledall the messy tangles in my brain, and I hummed, nestling closer against Zalen’s relaxed body.
I wasn’t entirely sure how long we stayed like that before my muscles began to flutter, releasing the cock resting inside of me. A noise of disappointment escaped my throat, as the distant, circling worries in my head began to close in again—vultures sensing an injured rodent.
Zalen’s broad hand rubbed slow circles over the bare skin of my back, reassurance in the face of my returning troubles. A new troublesome thought intruded—what would it be like to have Zalen’s comfort whenever I asked for it?It was akin to my desire to wake up tangled with Luca and Emiel every morning.
Dangerous.
Impractical.
Unrealistic.
I tried to remind myself of what I’d told the others.This can mean whatever we want it to mean. It didn’t help, mostly because I was starting to realize that I wanted it to mean things that weren’t within reach for any of us. In the absence of good sense, I pressed my face harder into the crook of Zalen’s shoulder... a place it seemed to fit all too well.
“All right?” Zalen asked, sounding cautious.
I nodded against his neck, not lifting my head.
“Good.” His hand moved from stroking my back to combing through my hair soothingly. “I’m not sorry we did this, but I’m sorry we didn’t talk first.”
“What do you mean?” I asked in a small voice, still not lifting my head to look at him.
He took a deep breath and let it out slowly, his chest lifting and lowering me as he sighed.
“I feel like you’ve been living in limbo, Mia,” he said. “And I don’t think you’re happy being stuck in that place. I think maybe it’s time for all of us to start looking to the future.”
TWENTY-SEVEN
Zalen
THIS CONVERSATION WASoverdue, and it was my fault I’d let it slide for so long. It was also just about the worst possible time to have it,afterI’d already lost control and taken Mia to bed.
I’d been deluding myself that the relationships she’d been forming with the others weren’t my business, simply because I’d been holding myself apart. But this was my house. Luca, Emiel, and Byron were my pack, even though no one in the house liked to use the word.