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FIFTY-NINE
Zalen
I’D BEEN WONDERING, in the weeks since the Elderflower Inn had lost its Michelin star, if Mia and Nat would come to me on their own about their finances... or if that was a conversation I’d need to initiate myself. It turned out, I shouldn’t have worried. Even if Nat, in particular, looked like he wanted to crawl in a hole and die.
“If you want to wait until we can bring the others in, we can just—” he began, not quite making eye contact with me.
“It’s true this affects them as well,” I said. “But I think we can cover the basics here and loop them in later. Nothing you can say is going to change their minds about things—or mine, either. So, what are your concerns?”
Mia spoke up. “Mostly, about how unfair it is of us to dump debt on you, when our financial circumstances are so mismatched. At least, I’m pretty sure they’re mismatched, based on how much this house is worth. I know we haven’t really talked about it before.”
Nat hurried on before I could reply. “We’re both from working-class backgrounds. We built the restaurant on the back of loans, and in the absence of some, erm, creative accounting practices, our combined net worth is firmly in the negative.”
He went on to outline their assets and liabilities as though I was another banker he needed to convince. I hid a wince—I’d suspected their situation was bad, but I hadn’t realized it wasthisbad. If I had known, I’d probably have been trying to give Mia money long before now.
“So,” Nat concluded, “we’re at least back in the position of being able to make our payments on time without having to take on additional debt to cover them. But it’s going to take years to climb out of the hole. And... there’s another problem with that.”
His gaze fell on Mia.
“I’m not sure I want to try and hold onto the Elderflower Inn any longer,” she said in a rush. Color flooded her cheeks.
I blinked, taken by surprise. “You... don’t?”
She shook her head rapidly, and I was pretty sure I wasn’t imagining the wetness in her eyes.
“It ate my life,” she said quietly. “And I’m not trying to make it sound like I regret it, because Idon’t. But I felt like such a badass, deciding to stand up to the gang that wanted to put us out of business. Then SSG kidnapped people I love, and I realized how little something like a restaurant really matters, in the end.”
Nat was staring at her, looking stricken. “You didn’t tell me you felt that way. Your decision to stand up to SSG didn’tcausethem to kidnap us.”
Mia held his gaze. “Didn’t it, though?”
Nat opened his mouth, but no words came out. After a moment, he closed it.
Mia sighed. “That’s part of the reason, but it’s not the only reason. When I picture everything involved in keeping the place going, in trying to get our Michelin star back... all I feel istired.”
Nat took her hand, tangling their fingers together. He, too, had an air of exhaustion just from talking about the subject.
“I can’t do this if I’m not excited about it. If I’ve lost thepassion. I don’t want my proudest achievement to become a job I dread going to every day. That’s fair, isn’t it?” Mia sounded plaintive—and like she expected me to judge her.
I definitely hadn’t seen this twist coming. But Mia and Nat’s career choices also weren’t my decision to make.
“It’s completely fair, Mia. But what about you, Nat?” I asked gently.
He gave a small, pained smile. “Mia said it best, when we talked about it earlier. My skills can transfer to all sorts of things. But I have no desire to wake up every morning and go to a place that makes my wife miserable.”
“No, of course not,” I agreed.