Page 160

“He might love looking after your pups as much as his own,” I finished, my throat feeling dry and tight.
Her gaze sharpened. “Zalen? Are you okay? Don’t you want...oh.”
I flinched internally at the sudden understanding lacing her tone.
“You’re thinking about Julie, aren’t you?” she asked gently.
I closed my eyes, the scarred remnants of my torn mating bond throbbing out its old, familiar ache.
“She and I talked about having pups.” The words emerged hoarse. “Before—”
Before teens with guns had mowed her down on a New York street corner, simply because she was standing next to someone they wanted to punish.
Slender arms wrapped around my waist, the scent of elderflower tickling my nose. I opened my eyes, looking down at the head of brown hair tucked beneath my chin. When my arms closed around Mia’s shoulders in return, I realized I was shaking.
“Maybe you should talk to Luca about this,” she murmured against my chest. “He may not even realize it’s a painful subject for you.”
I was still getting my head around the idea of being able to talk to Luca—and Emiel, for that matter—with the expectation that they’d actually communicate in return.
Tentatively, I prodded at the idea of pups running around the house, filling it with laughter and excited shouts.
“It’s not that I don’t want children,” I said carefully, needing to make it very clear. “I think... it just feels like letting Julie go. For good.”
She pulled away, but only far enough that she could look up and search my face.
“I don’t think that’s right, though,” she said. “You’re not going to miss Julie any less... or love her any less. And I know people always say, ‘oh, they’d want you to move on with your life.’ But in the end, Julie is dead, Zalen. She doesn’t have feelings about your life, because she’s not here anymore.You’rethe one who has to decide what you want your future to look like.”
The words hurt; but it was a clean kind of hurt, like a scalpel wielded during surgery to cut out infected flesh. I drew Mia in and pressed a kiss to her temple, followed by a longer one to her lips. She melted into the touch, a small, satisfied noise passing from her lips to mine. When I pulled back, it was only to rest our foreheads together.
“I know exactly what I want my future to look like,” I told her, meaning it. “I want it to look like the six of us, along with whatever children you and Luca decide to bring into the world.”
I felt her answering smile, even if I couldn’t see it.
“Hmm. Sounds like you’re going to be spending some of that New York stockbroker money on home renovations, in that case,” she said. “Possibly sooner, rather than later.”
I’d be lying if I said I hadn’t started running mental calculations about bedrooms and nurseries and fully finished live-in basements the moment Luca had turned down his birth control shot.
“Yeah... renovations, and maybe a giant addition off the back of the house,” I said, huffing out a small chuckle. “Guess I’d better double-check the bank balance. Not to mention, the HOA rules.”
Unfortunately, there wasn’t time for renovations before Byron’s grandmother showed up with Tony in tow a couple of days later, freshly legal with his signed emancipated minor papers.
“I’d let him stay longer,” Bea said, ruffling the teen’s dark hair. “But I’ve got another one coming in next week who needs a soft landing. It’s a small house, not likethisbig old place.” She gestured around at the spacious kitchen where we were standing.
“Don’t worry, I won’t be here long,” Tony said, sounding sheepish. “I just need a place to crash while I get a job and apartment sorted out.”
“Hey. You’re not an imposition, Tony,” I told him, as Princess sniffed warily at the newcomers’ feet. “You’re ourguest, and you’re allowed to take up space in the world.”
Bea snorted. “Hope you have better luck getting that idea through his skull than I have.” She patted Tony’s back and hiked her giant purse higher up on her shoulder. “Now, be good, and tell Byron he owes me a phone call, the little ingrate. You know how to reach me if you need anything, pup.”
I walked Bea to the front door and thanked her for everything she’d done, before returning to show Tony down to the makeshift bedroom we’d set up in the finished front half of the basement.
I wasn’t sure if Byron made good on the phone call to his adopted gran, but he did take point on helping Tony navigate the complicated process of launching a fully unsupported adult life at the tender age of sixteen.
Byron, Emiel, and I had agreed that it would be best for everyone involved if Tony was set up in his own place before the omegas’ heats arrived. To an extent, this was down to alpha territoriality on our parts. But the kid had already lived through a damned rough introduction to sexuality at way too young an age. I wasn’t at all sure he needed to be in the same house wheretwo lusty omegas were being bitten into a pack mating bond, while having screaming orgasms administered every few hours, day and night.
In the end, this wholly rational and well thought out plan lasted for exactly four days. Until, on a perfectly normal Monday evening, Mia went to answer a loud knock at the front door while the rest of us were finishing up her delicious dinner of empanadas and braised artichoke hearts.
Her startled yelp of fear had every single person at the table bolting upright, our chairs screeching across the tile.