Page 93 of Guarded King

“She was one of the good ones,” I say. “One who didn’t take the job with the aim of fucking our dad.”

She stiffens against me.

I clench my jaw and hold her a little tighter. “I shouldn’t have said that.” My voice comes out rough. “I have no idea how my dad manipulated them to get what he wanted. If he threatened their jobs.”

“Roman,” she breathes, pushing herself up. As she studies me, the light filtering in from outside shimmers in her moonlight hair, gilding the side of her face, and illuminating the compassion in her eyes.

Compassion I’ve done nothing to earn.

“Did your mom know?”

“He only made a token effort to hide it. She did a better job of hiding her affairs.” I keep my focus on where I’m skating my fingers over her delicate collarbone. “Apart from Tate, of course.”

“Tate?”

I’ve never talked to anyone but my brothers about this, but there’s no denying that I trust her. This moment between us wouldn’t be happening at all if I didn’t.

If we didn’t trust each other.

“He was a result of one of Mom’s affairs. In public, Dad maintained the lie that he was Tate’s father. It was more convenient than the alternative. A messy divorce wouldn’t have suited him. At home, though, was a different story. Tate grew up knowing he was different. It wasn’t easy for him.”

“He had you and Cole, though.” She says it with a certainty that makes my ribs constrict.

“Not the way he should have had.” I force out the admission. An hour ago, I wouldn’t have imagined confessing that I wasn’t there for Tate, foreitherof my brothers, the way I should have been. But despite the knot in my stomach, I keep going. “Dad made sure to put distance between the three of us as we got older. I think he worried that if we functioned as a unit at all, he’d lose power over us. He used our weaknesses against us. Mine was that I was the firstborn. And that I was the one most like him in appearance. The one he believed he could mold in his likeness.”

“He didn’t, though.”

I don’t respond. Because the truth is that he did until he overplayed his hand. That I loved him almost as much as I hated him until he made it impossible to love him, or even admire him, anymore. And I’ve spent well over a decade trying to unravel the real me from the man he tried to make me. Even now, I’m not sure I’ve managed it.

“Roman…” Her voice is hesitant. “I… Can I ask… Did your father ever sleep with his assistants?”

All my muscles coil tight. She thinks I’m the same as him. “Yes,” I grit out.

Before I can move, before I can put distance between us, she places her palm against my cheek. “You’re nothing like him. You didn’t manipulate me. You didn’t threaten my job. I’m here because I want to be here. Because I…” Her throat moves in a swallow. “Because you made me feel safe enough to say yes to this. And I get it. I know this will only happen this once. I won’t tell anyone, I promise.”

My heart twists.Fuck.This woman. Maybe, if things were different. If I were capable of more…

But they’re not.I’mnot.

She told me what she needs, a good job, a steady paycheck, stability, safety. Those are the only things of value I can offer.

And tonight.

I can offer her tonight.

Pulling her up my body, I claim her lips. I don’t want to think about my father. Not here when I’m with her. I want to memorize her taste, imprint the feel of her against my skin, burn this moment into my synapses, so when this night is over, I can remember how it felt to have her in my arms.

Desire is an insistent pulse in my veins. I have to have more.

In one quick movement, I flip her over, eliciting a gasp from her as I cover her body with mine. “I need you to spread those beautiful legs and let me taste you again.”

She does as I ask without hesitation.

I kiss and lick my way down between her breasts and over the smooth skin of her stomach. When my mouth finds her still-slick center, a shuddery breath spills from her lips.

A groan of satisfaction escapes me, vibrating through her.

She squirms, forcing me to grip her thighs and hold her open for me as I swirl my tongue over her clit, then lower, pressing it inside her tight little entrance.