Page 41

Not just that. The way she smiles, the sound of her laugh, her honey and vanilla scent. All of those things are damn intoxicating.
It’s infuriating that my brothers, and apparently my sister-in-law now, won’t leave me alone about her.
Luckily, before they can continue the unwelcome conversation, the intercom buzzes.
“That will be Beverly,” Delilah says as she slides off the couch.
“You didn’t tell me Mom was coming over.” I eye Cole as I consider whether leaving now would be too obvious.
“Didn’t I?” Cole smirks at me.
Mom looks as regal as ever as she sweeps into the apartment. Her hair is pulled up in an elegant bun, and her cool blue eyes survey the room. Beside her, Delilah is wearing a slight smile. I see why a second later when she holds up a soft-looking pink rabbit toy with long floppy ears.
“Look what your mom brought for Lottie,” she says.
“You don’t need to bring a toy every time you visit,” Cole says. “Her room will be too full for her to sleep in soon.”
I shake my head as Mom makes a beeline for her granddaughter. It’s hard to reconcile this woman with the one who spent our youth basically ignoring us while having a series of semi-discreet affairs. At least she made some effort at discretion. Dad didn’t even bother. Nannies, maids, assistants—he was never particular. And I wasn’t the only one of us unlucky enough to catch him in the act.
Despite the part of me that can’t help but resent Mom for her disinterest, another part understands why she spent more time out of the house than in it. The rest of me wonders why I don’t hate her for not being there for us nearly as much as I hate Dad.
“There’s our little girl.” Mom is wearing the softest smile I’ve ever seen from her as she comes to a stop in front of me. A dullache settles in my chest as I take her in. What would it have been like if she’d turned that kind of smile on us when we were kids?
Would it have made a difference in our lives? Would it have changed the kind of men we grew up to be?
Should I even bother wondering? After all, I’m happy with who and what I am.
“Can I hold her, Roman?” Her eyes are on me, arms already outstretched.
Once I’ve carefully transferred Lottie to her, she sits in the chair next to mine. Within seconds, Lottie starts to fuss a little, her face screwing up as if she might cry, and Mom tenses, looking to Delilah.
That ache is back. Sharper this time. I’ve never seen her so uncertain. She’s almost made a career out of acting as if every facet of her life is perfect. Even her family, which is anything but.
“It’s okay,” Delilah reassures her. “She’s probably ready for another nap. Just stand up and rock her a little.”
I meet Cole’s gaze, blinking in shock, and find him shaking his head and mouthinglater.
Mom stands, rocking Lottie with a bemused smile on her face, and my niece quickly settles.
Where the hell did this sudden change come from? It’s unsettling. With a glance at my watch, I determine I’ve been here long enough. I’ve still got plenty of work to get done this afternoon.
I catch Cole’s eye and jerk my head toward the front door. When he nods, I stand, and so does he.
“I’ll walk you out,” he says.
I give Delilah a kiss on the cheek, and when I say goodbye to Mom, she looks up at me with a warmth in her smile I assume is merely a remnant of what she was giving Lottie. But it doesn’t fade as she says, “It was nice seeing you, Roman.”
With a nod, I make for the door, Cole close behind me. Once we’re out of earshot, I turn to him.
“What the hell was that?”
He chuckles. “I noticed subtle changes after Dad got arrested, but since Delilah got pregnant, they’ve become more noticeable. And after Tate spoke to her about his father, well…” He shakes his head. “I think it finally hit her—all she’s missed out on.”
There was a time when Tate thought he may have lost Violet. As badly as he wanted to mend things with her, he had to deal with his own past first. As a not-so-secret product of one of Mom’s affairs, he’d always struggled with his position in our family. It took some time, but he worked it out. He knows he’s one of us and that he always has been.
Seems like whatever happened between him and Mom might have brought about an epiphany for both of them.
I say goodbye to Cole, but in the elevator on the way to the ground floor, that unsettled feeling washes over me again. My brothers’ lives are changing—havechanged. Even my mother’s is. The only one of us whose life remains the same is me.