Page 126 of From Drummer to Gamer

I shrugged.

“Is it your mother?”

“No,” I mumbled.

For the first time in my life, it actually wasn’t. We’d spent the afternoon with Mom and Dad, and of course, Mom was her usual self, trying to discipline me, but I wasn’t really bothered by it.

This was something else.

It was more of a big girl problem. You know that time of your life when you realized that you were growing up and that your time as a teenager was ending soon? The time when you questioned everything you’d ever done. When I chose to pursue gaming, I did so because it brought me joy, and it was the only thing I was good at. I didn’t think much about anything else.

Now, I wondered if maybe I should’ve studied harder and gotten myself into a decent college.

“Sierra,” Matty started sternly. “You either tell me what’s wrong, or I’m stopping the car and kissing it right out of your mouth.”

My breath hitched, and suddenly, my self-doubt was the least of my problems.

“It’s just that…I think I’m nervous about the game.”

“Nervous?” He frowned. “You never get nervous about your games.”

There he read me like a book already, in just a few short weeks? Tabbing and highlighting all my ticks, all my emotions, and memorizing them inside his brilliant head?

“Sierra.” His narrowed gaze slanted to me when I didn’t say anything.

I sighed. “I was just contemplating whether I made the wrong decision choosing this career.” There, that was one of my worries.

“I don’t think so.”

“What?”

“I don’t think you made the wrong choice. I think gaming was something you were born to do.”

I huffed out an empty laugh. “Most people are born to do great things, Matty, but I don’t think gaming is among them. Look at you, you were born to change people’s lives. That little boy, Luka, would have hated men all his life if it weren’t for you showing that not all men are like the monsters that hurt him. But gaming, what does it do? I sit behind a computer and type a few keys to win something that literally means nothing.”

A sharp inhale left his lips, and a thin line formed over his jaw. In an instant, he swerved the car to a halting stop, and the screech of the tires hitting the gravel sent an ominous note inside the car.

“What are you doin…”

In my next breath, he was right in my face, just barely an inch away. “You don’t get to, you hear me.” His rough fingers grasped my jaw. “No…you’re not allowed to ever think that way. The game you just play is some people’s escape from this shitty world. And you don’t just sit behind a computer and type shit. Any fucking person can do that. You play, Sierra. You play like no other person can. You work strategies in minutes and baffle your opponents with your incredible ability. Don’t fail to see how smart you are, and I won’t let you think otherwise.”

Tears welled in my eyes. “You really believe that?”

His gaze softened as he brushed a soft finger under my eyes. “Yes, firecracker.”

“No one has ever supported me like the way you do.”

“And I’m not going to stop.” His nose touched mine as he pressed a soft kiss on my upper lip. “Now, stop worrying yourself. You’re going to win that tournament and your parents’ approval.”

But would I win your heart?

“Why don’t you take a break?” Matty whispered in my ear, hovering over me from behind.

“I can’t,” I mumbled, my fingers flying over the keyboard. Semis was only two days away and I had to give it my all.

My teammates’ voices cheered just as we won our seventeenth game in a row. But that wouldn’t guarantee anything. Your eighteenth match could be your downfall. You would never know.

“Si,” Kiki groaned through the speakers. “I think that’s enough for today. I’m exhausted, and my wrist is killing me.”