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“Ah,” Xavier says. “It’s cute. I can definitely see you in a place like that.”
Tristan grunts his agreement, turning his head to keep the bakery in sight as we continue on down the street.
“Was it a lack of funding or a lack of customers?” Dominic asks, sitting back in his seat.
I fidget with my hands in my lap, staring down at them. The idea of discussing this with three successful men who managed to make their businesses work makes me feel a little terrible, if I’m honest. But I brought it up, and it’s not like I can hide the truth of it from them. Especially if I want Xavier’s help to make sure it doesn’t happen again.
“Both? I mean, I had customers, but I just didn’t have enough in the bank to keep up. So I had to cut back on what I could offer because I couldn’t afford all the ingredients I needed. That madethe customers drop off because I didn’t have as big a selection as other places. The fewer customers I had, the harder it was to make ends meet, and then…” I trail off. They can see the picture from there, I’m sure.
Xavier reaches out and covers one of my hands with his own. “That’s always hard,” he says. “Running a business is never as easy as anyone makes it out to be. Everybody wants to be an entrepreneur, but no one really talks about the hardships that go along with the job.”
“Yeah,” I sigh.
I can feel eyes on me, and I glance up to see Tristan staring at me with his usual guarded expression. At times like this I wish more than ever that he was easier to read. I can’t tell if he feels sympathy for the situation or if he just thinks I’m an idiot for getting into it in the first place.
“The truth is most businesses fail,” Dominic says.
Xavier rolls his eyes. “Helpful, really.”
Dominic gives him a sharp look. “What I mean is that most businesses fail without help. Whether it’s financial or otherwise. Were you juggling things on your own?”
I nod, and Dominic makes a ‘there you go’ expression.
“I wasn’t good at running a business back then,” I can admit. “I was caught up in it being my dream, and I didn’t realize how much other stuff went into it. I had some savings, and I thought that would be enough, but the amount of overhead you need is crazy. There was no way I was ever going to keep up, and I know that now. I’m learning more now than I ever knew back then, and I’m so grateful Xavier has been helping me learn more about being a business owner.”
Xavier shrugs, grinning. “It’s nothing, really. I just hope you remember all my lessons so when I swing by to get free baked goods as payment, there won’t be any problems.”
I laugh. “Don’t worry. I’ll make whatever your favorite is every day.”
“This arrangement is going to be so beneficial,” he says, sighing happily. I don’t know if he means the one between us two or the one between the four of us, but either way, I definitely agree in the moment.
Jonas drops us off at home, and we pile out of the car and into the house. Xavier starts making noises about being hungry, but too tired to cook, so he and Dominic devolve into an argument about what to order for dinner.
Tristan ends it by ordering Italian while they’re in the middle of bickering, and I smile, at how weirdly domestic things have already gotten between us.
The food is hot and fragrant when it comes, and I tuck into a plate of pasta with rich red sauce and huge meatballs. A platter of garlic bread gets passed around the table, and by the time we’ve finished eating I’m stuffed and warm and happy.
I didn’t realize how quiet and lonely it was, eating dinner in my apartment alone every night. And I definitely wasn’t eating food like this. It was noodles in a microwavable cup or eggs on toast if I had it. Sometimes I’d treat myself to picking up fast food on the way home if I’d had a good day.
But none of that compares to this.
We all help clean the table, throwing out containers and loading the dishwasher before Tristan and Xavier disappear up the stairs to their rooms to do whatever it is they do to wind down.
Dominic starts the dishwasher and then turns to leave, but I realize I’m still wearing his jacket. I’d gotten so used to the way it felt to have it on, that besides having to shake the sleeves back so I didn’t trail them in my pasta sauce, I barely noticed it was there while we were eating.
“I should give this back to you,” I say, starting to shrug out of it.
Dominic pins me with that intense stare of his, his eyes gaze making me flush a little. After a beat, he shakes his head. “You keep it,” he says.
“What? I couldn’t?—”
“You could,” he counters. “It looks better on you anyway.”
My eyes widen because that’s the last thing I expected him to say. I pull the jacket back on properly, and I can hear my heartbeat in my head. It feels so loud that he must be able to hear it too.
“Are you sure?” I ask, the words coming out soft and unsure.
Dominic’s lips twitch in something like a smile. “I don’t say things I don’t mean,” he says, not looking away from me for a second. There’s heat and tension winding between us, and it makes it hard to breathe. We’re standing so close together now that I can smell him all over again, the scent fresher than the one embedded into his jacket. It washes over me like the tide, and I’m struggling to stay afloat.