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“Oh.”

Anna walked over to her chair and bent over to pick up her book and her bottle of water. She didn’t look at Hayley once.

Hayley didn’t say anything, either.

Anna silently brushed past and went back into the campervan, closing the door behind her. Only when she was safely back inside did she finally exhale.

Had that just happened?

Anna got ready for bed, quickly, totally unable to ignore how turned on she was. She had completely soaked through her panties. Touching herself to inspect the situation, she was so wet it was almost worrying. She washed her hands to try and remove her arousal from her fingers.

She got into bed and curled up on her side, facing the wall. A faint smell of campfire lingered in Anna’s hair. The look of desire in Hayley’s eyes as she’d danced for her was all she could see. Anna was too hot, so she shrugged the duvet off slightly. They’d taken to sharing the light duvet in these hotter nights instead of their sleeping bags zipped together. Anna had been sleeping better than she had in years, lately. How the fuck was she supposed to sleep next to her now? The thought of Hayley coming in and getting into bed was both nerve-racking and incredibly exciting at the same time.

Outside, there was no movement. Hayley must still have been sitting there by the fire. Even the thought of that was arousing – Hayley, sitting there in the aftermath of whatever it was that just happened. What was she thinking about?

Anna couldn’t sleep. She lay there, replaying the lap dance in her head. Dancing like that, touching herself so suggestively. Hayley’s questions about sex. Hayley’s breasts. How had things escalated so quickly? Why had Hayley asked her to give her a lap dance? Why had Hayley looked so turned on? Did she enjoy it as much as Anna had? Did Hayley find her attractive? Did she like her? Anna pushed those thoughts from her head. They’d been down that road before and it had only led to heartache. Anna wasn’t going to go there again.

Quietly, the door opened, and Hayley came in. Anna tensed up, wide awake, biting her lower lip. Hayley got ready for bed super quietly. Anna rubbed her feet together, unable to get comfortable.

Hayley got into bed and turned the light off. Anna cleared her throat, unconsciously, then wished she hadn’t made a noise.

“Are you still awake?” Hayley said. Her voice was soft and gentle.

“Yeah.”

“I thought you would be asleep. Did I wake you?”

“No. I was awake.”

“Oh.”

An awkward silence stretched out between them. Anna’s mind raced. “Well, goodnight then.”

“Sleep well, Anna,” Hayley whispered.

Anna waited for Hayley to cuddle into her, like they’d been doing every night now. They’d always slept so well together. It came so naturally to them. But tonight, Hayley stayed away. Disappointment coursed through her. With Hayley, this was an all too familiar feeling. Anna lay on her front, protecting her heart. Why did she keep doing this to herself?

Eleven

June 2013

This was no dream. Anna deepened the kiss, unable to get enough of Hayley’s mouth. They didn’t have long. Hayley would be on a plane home far too soon. Why had they left this so late? Anna pulled Hayley closer towards her. Their legs entwined. Anna traced her fingers all over Hayley’s neck and jaw, into her hair, and down her sides. This was incredible.

They broke off from the kiss, noses still touching, and looked into each other’s eyes. It was dizzying. Hayley’s hand drifted down from Anna’s hair, neck, and onto her arm and then down over Anna’s waist, where it stopped. Hesitantly, Hayley kissed her again as her hand drifted lower. She stroked the skin around Anna’s lower tummy, gently pushing her hand under Anna’s top.

Anna tingled at her touches, unable to believe they were really doing this. She brushed her hand over Hayley’s breasts, breathing hard in between their kisses.

Hayley gasped.

Anna squeezed Hayley’s breast a little too hard as pent-up energy came overflowing out of her.

Hayley moaned.

Hayley ran her hand under Anna’s top all the way up to her naked breasts and caressed her nipple. Anna stopped, frozen in place, registering the feeling. With arms and legs tangling, in a haze of near desperate clutching and grasping, Anna had never felt anything like this. Her skin was burning up and there was a pool of wetness between her legs.

Hayley’s fingers went to places Anna had only dreamed of as they kissed like their lives depended on it. She went into overdrive as Hayley explored her slick folds. It was like Hayley was playing her, completely in control of her pleasure and her pain. All Anna could do was lie there and absorb the way it felt and how special this was.

But that wasn’t enough. Anna put her hand in between Hayley’s legs. The wetness devouring Anna’s fingers made Anna quiver in pleasure. The look in Hayley’s eyes was so different to what was normally there, but also, Anna had caught glimpses of this look many times. She’d just never quite believed it. Fingers fumbled and stroked and rubbed. Hayley felt so good. Anna had no idea what she was doing but she desperately wanted to show Hayley how she really felt about her. To make her see. In a blur of heat and pure need, something clicked into place. This was what she wanted. Their emotional connection was so strong, and now to be doing this it was out of this world. She was definitely a lesbian if being with someone was meant to feel like this.