Page 28 of Worth Every Moment (Hawkston Billionaires #4)

I playfully slap his arm. “You are such a dick. So this isn’t you?”

“Of course it’s not me. SeblovesBJs, indeed. That sounds like a teenager. A horny one at that. I am a mature man of sophistication,” he says with mock sincerity. “I only use the term fellatio .”

Laughter honks out of me. “It sounds like you. SeblovesBJs even calls me ‘Lefroy’.” I fix him with a hard, truth-searching stare. “It’s you, isn’t it?”

He laughs. A glorious sound that starts small and cascades to a full belly laugh that has me laughing along with him.

“Okay fine. It’s me. I love BJs and I don’t want these random people thinking they can get in your ‘panties’.

” He makes quotation marks with his fingers like he thinks the word ‘panties’ is ridiculous.

“I’m doing cyber-security. SeblovesBJs is my alias. ”

“Really gonna scare them off, SeblovesBJs. You sound terrifying.”

He snatches the phone from me, still laughing. When he recovers, he says, “So, what do you say about this dating thing? You’ve got to admit it’s a good idea.”

“Hmmm. Is it really a good idea to date a man whose online alter-ego is SeblovesBJs? I don’t think so.”

He sighs. “That’s a very old username. I’m not that kid anymore.”

“Could have fooled me.”

His expression turns serious. “If it will help, I’ll do this for you.”

Heat rises to my cheeks as I lie back and contemplate what he’s offering. I’m a bundle of nerves at the mere idea, and knowing that he’s watching me, scanning my reactions and deducing God knows what from the tiniest muscle flicker around my mouth or eyes, makes it worse .

I should tell him no. Fake dating Seb? That’s a disaster waiting to happen.

But I’m not going to tell him no. I’ve already decided. The thrill at the mere idea of pretending to date him is so intense I can’t ignore it.

Besides, he might be right. This could be the perfect way to adjust public perception of me. And then there’s the added bonus that Mum would hate it.

Amy’s words from the last time we met gatecrash my mind. You can totally fuck Seb Hawkston too, and there’s bugger all your mum can do about it.

I shove them away as rapidly as they entered. This is not about fucking. This is about fake dating.

But it’s risky, not least because we’ve already crossed the line between friendship and sex. For it to work, and not destroy our friendship, I’d need to put limits in place. Maybe if I only agree to do it until I hear back about the audition, I could handle that.

“The audition is in two and a half months. I should find out in three.”

Seb nods as though he’s calculating something in his head. “So, around the time of Nico and Kate’s wedding?”

“Yeah. Exactly.” I turn to face him. “If we do this, we end it after the wedding. I don’t want to steal their thunder or ruin their celebrations, so we’ll wait until we get home. I should have heard about the role by then, so we’ll know if it’s worked or not.”

“So…” he says slowly. “Short and effective. All for show.”

“Yes.”

“And until then, I will worship you in public, without reserve, and when I’m finished, the whole world will know just how desirable you are.”

Fuck me. Hearing him say those words makes my heart race, but I play it down. “So SeblovesBJs is gonna get on his knees for me?” I tease.

“I’ve been on my knees for you for years. Seriously, whatever you want me to do, I’ll do it.”

He sounds so earnest that my chest feels all tingly, and it’s hard to breathe.

We’re dangerously close to pushing a boundary I really don’t want to touch, and yet, even edging close to it is a high I can’t resist. For a few moments, I stay quiet, mentally coaching myself on how to breathe until the restriction lifts. Could I really do this with Seb?

“If we do this fake dating thing…” I begin, and he rolls to his side to face me as I speak, propping himself up on one elbow. So attentive. “We need rules.”

“Sure.”

“Number one. No sex.”

He sits up. “None?”

“Of course, none. You can’t fake date me and be seen falling out of a nightclub with another woman. Or climbing into a cab. Or taking someone to one of the hotels or… any of it. You can’t embarrass me like that. You have to quit playing around.”

A gentle smirk twists his lips. “I meant with you, Lefroy.”

My mouth drops open, and at my evident shock his grin breaks wide.

I sit up too and cross my arms over my chest. “Stop it. Be serious.”

He settles his features. “So, celibacy for the duration then?”

“Yes.”

“Okay,” he says without missing a beat.

I pull back, blinking at him. “Okay?

“That’s what I said.”

“So you’d give up sex to fake date me?”

“Yes.” His expression mellows and he tilts closer as if about to share a secret. “If I were committed to you, fake or otherwise, I’d never look at anyone else.”

My pulse quickens. Hearing those words, in that deep, serious tone, unsettles me more than if he’d made another crass joke. “Great,” I say, hoping he didn’t notice my reaction. “If we’re going to do this, you need to devote yourself to me, and me alone.”

He raises a lazy palm. “I get it—”

“Do you? Because you cannot fuck with my reputation. I do not mess about.”

Lying back on the grass, he puts one hand behind his head again. “There is no issue here. I’m all yours for three months. I’ll be very convincing.” A hint of his mischievous smirk appears. “Plus, I already know what you taste like, so if anyone asks—”

I lunge at him, clapping a hand over his mouth, but it’s so impulsive that I hadn’t thought it through.

I’m nearly lying on him, his breath hot and damp against my palm, his large hand sliding over my lower back.

My thoughts scatter like dominoes, piecing themselves back together in a pattern I don’t want, but can’t resist. This feels good.

This is wrong. I’m excited . Our eyes lock, igniting a fire beneath my skin.

I must look horrified because Seb’s blue eyes flash with amusement, cracking the energy that held us bound, and something wet and warm licks the palm I have smacked over his mouth.

His tongue.

I leap back, wiping my hand furiously on my dress, but unable to ignore the relief that he’s given me an excuse to break free of his embrace.

If he hadn’t licked my hand, what would I have done?

What would have happened? My heart crashes against my ribcage.

“Gross. You are such a child. I can’t believe I’m even contemplating trusting you with something this important. ”

His grin widens. “I promise I’ll treat your reputation the way I’d treat your heart.”

“Stomp all over it?” I waggle my head to let him know I’m joking. I don’t really think he’d do that. Not on purpose, at any rate. In spite of all our ups and downs, he’s always been a good friend to me, and I hope I’ve been one to him too.

He gives me a dismissive frown. “No. Treasure it and keep it close to mine.” Pressing a hand over his heart, a teasing gleam appears in his eyes and he adds, “obviously.”

His words raise a swirl of emotion and I blow out a quick breath to release the tension.

He sounds like he’s joking, but the conflict of wanting it to be real, and hating that it’s all part of this pretense he’s concocted, is too much to contain.

I grab a fistful of grass and throw it in his face, making him splutter and spit out the blades that find their way into his mouth.

Seeing him so discomposed makes me laugh, and when he laughs too as he wipes his mouth on the back of his hand, I feel giddy.

“So,” he says when he’s cleared the grass from his lips. “Is this happening or not?”

“Yes. But we need to make a real splash. Very public. Very showy.” Seb winces, but he said he’d do anything, and I am taking him at his word. “And I have the perfect idea.”