Page 27 of Worse Fates (Soulmates Suck #1)

“Oh yes, I forgot to tell you.”

I glance at Lucero from where I’m perched on his lap. After our long conversation we watched more documentaries, Lucero’s hands gently massaging my back as I drifted in and out of sleep.

There are things we need to do; make a real plan for the blood mages, check on Kai, and now I’ve maybe got a future that doesn’t involve running away. Damn, I could go to school or…maybe actually let my friends know what's happening in my head, and life. Be vulnerable, like I was with Lucero.

A shiver runs up my spine.

Shit, sounds scary. Maybe I’ll just let my brain melt instead.

I blink, realising I forgot to answer Lucero.

“What did you forget?”

He chuckles, sleepy and amused.

“Kai and Rurik slept together.”

“WHAT!”

I shoot up, my every other thought tossed out the window.

“Why wasn’t that the first thing you told me when I woke up?”

And climb off his lap.

“We had more important things to discuss.”

Lucero tries to pull me back down, but I slap his hands away.

“And where are you going?”

Raising an eyebrow as I pull on a pair of Ramy’s soft sweats (I really need to get my own clothes).

“To talk to Kai about him and Rurik obviously.”

A slow, seductive hand runs up my thigh.

“Or…”

Lucero’s fingers brush the curve of my ass. My breathing hitches as his sure fingers find my crease, teasing.

“You could stay here.”

His voice is low, eyes half-lidded

My muscles and brain—and dick—fight on what we should do. But my brain, just barely, wins out and I slide out of his tempting hands.

“Dude—”

Lucero raises a warning eyebrow.

“Er, I mean, my light, I’ll be right back. Or not, I dunno. But I gotta talk to Kai about this. Do you think Rurik bit him?”

Lucero drops back onto the sofa with a sigh, eyes roaming over my body as if I’d denied him a treat. He can be pretty dramatic when he wants to be, it’s cute.

“Probably not,”

Lucero replies, and his fingers run up and down the hard panels of his stomach, a knowing smirk in his eyes as I follow their path.

“I doubt Kai wished to see more blood after that car crash.”

Head bobbing, I chew my lip. Gaze locked on Lucero’s firm torso.

“Didn’t you need to see your friend?”

The way Lucero says it, it’s more of an invite to stay.

But I snap myself out of his trance with a shake of my head.

“Stop distracting me. I’ll see you in a bit,”

I call over my shoulder and rush to the door—grabbing something that's glinting on the table to shove in my pocket. But before I can leave, I dart back to Lucero, skidding to a stop and all but falling on him.

“Love you.”

And pecked him on the cheek.

Or I planned for just a peck. Lucero had other ideas and ten minutes later I’m out of the bedroom, lips swollen.

The sound of my bare feet hitting the carpet doesn’t have the impact of my boots, but it announces my presence before I enter the kitchen all the same. Kai already looking up, mouth open to say something—but I beat him to it.

“You had sex with Rurik!”

I hear a grunt that sounds both annoyed and entertained, then spot Rurik lounging in a reading nook, holding a steaming mug.

“Wait, what?”

I startle at Ramy’s voice from where he is at the kitchen counter. How the hell did I miss him?

“When?”

And Ray’s head bounces between Kai and Rurik like he’s watching a tennis match.

Kai storms over, grabbing my forearm and hisses.

“Mate, do you have a single subtle bone in your body?”

And drags me out the door.

“C’mon, Ramy!”

he calls over his shoulder, and after a moment’s pause Ramy’s footsteps follow us.

“You’re the one with the extra bone, if you get what I mean,” I tease.

“The bloody kettle gets what you mean,”

Kai grumbles.

“You slept with Rurik?”

Ramy asks again.

Looking over my shoulder, I say.

“I kinda thought you’d slept with him too, and Lucero.”

Ramy makes a face like I asked if he eats dog food.

“Why would I do that?”

“Because they’re big, sexy, muscular models who wanna suck on things?”

Kai snorts, but doesn’t disagree with me.

“It would be like you sleeping with Kai,”

Ramy says and it’s Kai’s turn to make a face.

“Besides I kinda…well, I thought Vidar and I…nevermind. Back to Kai.”

“Not back to me.”

Kai shoves me into the same little living room I met Rurik—without his fangs in my neck—for the first time.

“Wait, wait.”

I wave my hands in the air.

“You wanted to be with Vidar? But he’s…so…”

I suck in my cheeks, trying to imitate a skeleton.

Ramy shuts the door behind us.

“Trust me when you see Vidar once he’s better, you’ll understand how he convinced four very sensible men to change their whole lives and become vampires in a handful of days.”

Kai stops squeezing my forearm to cock an eyebrow.

“That hot?”

Ramy rests his back on the door and lets out a long, dreamy sigh.

“You have no idea. Too bad he’s straight.”

And from Ramy’s tone it is one of life's greatest tragedies.

“Oh, piss off, no way.”

I punch my fists onto my hips.

“You’re telling me Vidar collected a bunch of hot gay dudes to have friendly adventures with? Dunno, sounds pretty homosexual to me.”

“Mega homosexual,”

Kai agrees.

“Anyway,”

Ramy waves us off.

“You and Rurik?”

“Oh, yeah that.”

Kai aims daggers at me.

“You’re a dickhead, by the way.”

Pointing stupidly at myself, I say, “Me?”

“Yes, you! You big fucking idiot. The last time I saw you, you were screaming and sobbing like the world was ending. Rurik kept trying to, and let me make the madness of this extremely fucking clear—he kept trying to feed you his blood to heal you. Which was one of, if not the most, fucked up things I’ve ever witnessed in my life. And all this blood mage bull crap. Oh yeah, and we all nearly died. So yes, I fucked Rurik.”

I reach for him.

“Shit, Kai. I am so sorry. I really am—”

“This is fucking insane, Golden. You said he was a vampire, and I believed you. Last night I saw it first hand and now I really believe you, does that make sense?”

“Er sorta—”

“Shut up, mate, I’m talking,”

he huffs.

“I was freaking out and scared and just wanted to grab you and Ramy and get the fuck outta all this scary vampire bullshit!”

Ramy clears his throat.

“You do realise I’m one of the vampires you're talking about?”

Kai shoots a glare at him.

“Fuck off, Ramy. Jesus Christ, you're one of my people now so just let me be upset and rant.”

“I’m one of your people?”

Ramy’s smile is slow, but wide.

Grabbing hold of Kai’s shoulders, I pull him into a fierce hug. He follows willingly, and holds back just as hard. I try to push all my love and apologies into this one gesture, hoping he’ll understand.

Body part, by body part, Kai relaxes. Rigid shoulders yield, taunt arms unravel and his stiff neck loosens.

“I couldn’t handle what was happening,”

Kai, quiet and small, says into my hair.

“And Ramy had to go clean up that bloody wreck. And Rurik is a bastard but he was…nice, okay? He kept checking in on me, and getting me warm drinks. Then when he hugged me it was just…for half a second the world wasn’t drenched in blood—it made sense. And the two times we had sex I felt a little bit more like myself again.”

“Dude, you did it twice?”

I haven't even done it once.

“Mate!”

“Sorry.”

I hug him harder.

“And yeah it was scary. I thought…you weren’t awake when I woke up and I thought…”

“Yeah,”

he breathes, the weight of it blowing my curls away from my neck.

“Oi, Ramy. C’mon,”

Kai says, soft but expectant, a big brother calling his siblings in for dinner.

“Oh, sorry…let me just, erm.”

Ramy inches closer—arms up like he’s defusing a bomb instead of joining a group hug.

My fist darts out, grabbing his black t-shirt and tugging him forward, so he can awkwardly drape his arms over our shoulders.

Neither Kai or me care, our arms go around Ramy’s back and squeeze hard.

“Dude, what we went through was awful,”

I say to Kai.

“And I hate that you got hurt. I know I didn’t want you coming with me in the first place, but I also think I’d be lost without you, too. But if you’ve gotta leave once they take out these blood mages, I’m never going to be anything but grateful. You're my best friend, Kai. You look out for everyone else and I failed in looking out for you. But never again, alright?”

“Golden is right, Kai. Once the blood mages are dealt with, you can leave,”

Ramy tells him.

“We’ve been friends for a short time, but I’ve never had a fiercer one. I don’t want you getting hurt.”

Kai detangles from our embrace and drops onto the sofa, we follow suit and sit so he’s sandwiched between us.

“I’m sticking around. I can’t just up and leave you two.”

Kai’s head drops back, and he gazes at the ceiling.

I’ve been friends with Kai most of my life—but when something has lasted that long, it can be cherished or taken for granted.

Jace’s beatings didn’t only affect me, but Kai, too.

And not just watching me go back to him time and time again.

We used to see each other or talk every day, but when I started leaving, days would go by without a word. Weeks. This time it was months.

Kai thought Jace had killed me.

And then he thought he’d killed me again last night.

He’s also got his own shit going on, when was the last time he told me about the tattoos he was designing for clients? Or he ranted about his stupid little brothers?

I can’t let our friendship be one sided, I love him after all.

“I’m sorry, Kai.”

My hand goes to his knee.

“I really am.”

Kai glances at me and after a pause, smiles.

“Don’t look so sad, Golden. We’re good. Promise.”

Lips pulling up, I roll into his side and cuddle into him.

“Ramy, you gotta join our group hug again.”

Ramy chuckles, cheeks a little pink, and joins. A little smoother this time.

“So…” I begin.

Kai waves a hand.

“Mate, just ask.”

“Was he good?” I blurt.

Kai grins.

“We sucked each other off then fucked. It was great.”

Annoyingly, heat warms my cheeks.

“That’s good…”

Ramy pats my leg.

“You're so cute, Golden.”

“You haven’t sucked Lucero off yet?” Kai asks.

“He hasn’t….”

my knee begins to bounce.

“he hasn’t asked.”

Ramy grins, kind but with an edge of teasing.

“Very cute.”

Laughing, I flip Ramy off.

“Oh, piss off.”

Kai snickers.

“I’m surprised. Sometimes you look up at him with these eyes.”

“Oh yeah, those eyes,”

Ramy agrees.

Forehead drawing in, I ask.

“What eyes?”

“How to put this…”

Ramy hums.

“‘Let me get on my knees and suck you off, daddy’, eyes.”

I kick Kai.

“S-shut the fuck up!”

My face is so hot I think I might burst.

“I do not!”

Kai snorts and kicks me back.

“I don’t! Right, Ramy?”

Ramy purses his lips, cheek twitching.

I cover my face and drop my head back, groaning.

“I can never look at him again.”

Kai’s laughing slows.

“But he’s worth all this, right? Lucero.”

The moment stays quiet, neither of us speaking, but words exchange. The feelings I have for Lucero consume my heart and over shadow nearly everything else. To love someone to this extent shouldn’t be healthy or normal, but—I do.

My hand goes to Kai’s and I entwine our fingers.

For Kai? I would break my own heart, I would be brave enough. Strong enough.

“He’s worth it. But…”

From my pocket I pull out something glinting and hold it up.

“If you ever wanna bail, Kai, let me know. I’ve already stolen Lucero’s keys.”

Kai doubles over chortling, even Ramy tossing his head back to laugh long and loud.