Page 131 of Wife After Wife

“I’d rather Eddie didn’t contract a preventable disease,” interrupted Harry. “I’d quite like him to make it to adulthood. Please go ahead, Lisa.”

Harry hailed a cab and lifted Eddie in, still secured in the buggy, then strapped in Eliza. Thank heavens for black cabs. Single-handedly folding a buggy while holding a baby was a mighty challenge. Running a huge corporation often seemed simple in comparison to looking after two young children.

At Regent’s Park they set off walking through an avenue of bare trees. The weak February sun shone through the branches, and the ground glistened with frost. It was a bitterly cold day, and the children’s cheeks and noses were bright pink, their breath emerging as misty ghosts that flew off to play. Eliza seemed oblivious to the cold as she tore after a squirrel, her red boots crunching on the grass.

Harry smiled, watching her. Oh, to be able to live in the moment like that.

When they reached the end of the avenue, he sat down on a bench, parking Eddie beside him. The honk of a seal reached him on the wind, and he had a sudden memory of coming to the zoo with Katie and Maria all those years ago, and bumping into Bennie and Henry. It had been the beginning of the end of his marriage. That little boy would be eighteen or nineteen now. Would he ever show up on Harry’s doorstep? What was he like? A sense of loss pushed its way in.

He realized... he was taking an interest in the world again, thinking beyond his own pain, his day-to-day existence. He felt like he might be heading back into the light. But if that light was going to shine on him, he needed to take himself in hand, kick the drugs and the whisky. And perhaps he should join a gym. Just this short walk across the park had rendered him breathless.

“Daddy, look at the squirrel!” Eliza gave them a happy wave, and Eddie chortled.

They deserved better than this broken man he’d become.

•••

After the children were in bed, Harry served himself only half of the pasta dish Lisa had left him, and poured a glass of water. Later, he logged on to the computer and started looking at property. Eliza and Eddie should have a proper home, with a big garden to run around in. He had a hankering to live in Richmond, somewhere not too far from the river. A sprawling, centuries-old property on the edge of Richmond Park caught his eye. It looked like a Tudor hunting lodge and was gloriously beautiful, with the added bonus of a tennis court and two swimming pools. Somehow it was calling to him. He noted down the details.

He was about to shut down the computer when theAlt Lifeicon caught his eye. He wondered if Milly and Arabella were online. If not, he could always look for Chloe0573. They had clicked on the “friend” thing at the end of the last session.

After a few false starts he managed to locate her, and he lost track of time as they chatted, having virtual dinner together and going out to a nightclub. It was bonkers, but he was having a wonderful evening and—oh, this was weird—he was starting to feel a strong attraction to this animated collection of pixels. Was it her appearance, or her conversation, or a mix of the two?

They walked out of the club into a beautiful night, the trees around them silvered by moonlight. In the distance was the inky silhouette of a towering mountain range. It wasn’t the sort of view one would expect from a nightclub. But as Harry was learning, in the virtual world, anything was possible. Swept up in the romance of the moment, he chose Kiss from the dropdown menu. As Eros03 took Chloe0573 in his arms, fireflies flitting around them, Harry had to admit they looked good together.

He was astonished to find it was way past midnight when he logged off. Once again he’d forgotten himself, taken no pills, stayed off the bottle.

That night, the ghosts stayed away.

•••

Over the following weeks, Eros03 and Chloe0573 met often, and as their online friendship blossomed into something more intimate, the real world began to overlap with the virtual one. But Harry drew a line. He relished the chance to be someone else—a man who wasn’t a household name, who didn’t come with tragic “dead wife” stories, who was baggage-free. One who could manage without drugs and alcohol. Eros03 was a rewind to an earlier Harry Rose, and he didn’t want to come out from behind his avatar. At least, not yet.

Part of him wanted to believe the real Chloe0573 was indeed a strapping blonde with a superior talent for archery. But he was realistic enough to know she was more likely to be Sharon from Wolverhampton with a dull husband and three delinquent children (delinquent because their mother was too busy living another life to look after them properly).

As time went on, Harry was torn. Should he ask her to reveal her true identity, or carry on with the make-believe?

Then, one evening:

Chloe0573: DM me next time?

Eros03: What’s DM?

When she explained, he didn’t reply straightaway. Did he want to cross that line? In the end, curiosity got the better of him.

Eros03: Sure

Chloe0573: Cool! Look in your inbox!

Sure enough, when he logged on the following evening, there was a message. It was from “Anki.”

Hi, Eros! I kinda feel like we’re pretty close now, do you? Don’t wanna spoil the magic so just let’s share the basics forstarters? I’m Anki and I live in Cleveland, Ohio, USA. I work as a travel agent. I’d love to know about the real Eros, if you feel ready to share? I’m gonna take a guess and say you’re not American because of the way you talk. Am I right? Xxx

Not from Wolverhampton, then. American. Anki? It sounded Scandinavian, or German. So maybe she did have white-blond hair and powerful thighs.

Hello there, Anki. You are quite correct, I am from across the pond. Name of Harry. I live in London and work for a large corporate. I’m a single dad (recently widowed, I’m afraid) with three children: one grown-up, one small, and one extra-small. I love fast cars and playing tennis.

He didn’t mention he was a widower twice over, for fear she might think him neglectful. What had Oscar Wilde said? To lose one parent may be regarded as a misfortune; to lose both looks like carelessness. Anki might make a similar assumption about Harry and his wives.