Page 222 of Whisper

“And I’m just your husband! And this is just your home! Your country! Goddamnit, you haven’t told me the truth!” Jesus, he’d brought an al-Qaeda operative into Dan’shouse, into Dan’s CIA home office.

He should have called it in as soon as he’d seen the truck. He should never have listened to Dawood, to his lies. He was such a sucker. Dawood knew exactly how to play him.

“They’re just supposed to set the fire! I was the one sent to America. I was the one who was supposed to carry out the attack. Me, and me alone, with the mole. I didn’t want the others to die! Don’t ask me to send them to their deaths!” Dawood started toward him.

“Stop!” Kris bellowed. Lightning fast, he reached into Dan’s desk, drew his hidden pistol. “Do not come any closer!”

Dawood froze. His eyes went wide, perfect circles. He held up his hands. “I swear, I’m not lying to you,ya rouhi.”

“Shut up!” Kris’s hands trembled. “Just shut up. I don’t want to hear your voice.”

What did he do? What the fuck did he do? If he called the FBI, brought them here, he’d implicate Dan in his fucked-up decisions. Drag him into his shit, again.

Damn it, he had no fucking idea what to believe.

Dawood was in front of him, living, breathing, aching. Talking about conspiracies and begging for Kris’s help, but he had no proof, nothing except his words and a few scattered texts.

What if those were faked? What if he’d sent them to himself? How easy was it to buy a burner cell phone, create the image of a conspiracy? Convince Kris to get him intel from the CIA’s mission logs with a wild story that pulled on Kris’s heartstrings.

Where was the truth? Could he believe the words of a dead man, a ghost who had chosen to walk away from him, follow a path that split them apart?

He’d always just wanted to know the truth, know what had happened to his David.

But the truth was unbearable, impossible to hold in his heart.

And what Dawood said, the possibilities he presented…

Kris didn’t know how to reconcile the past and the man he knew with his broken heart, his shattered soul. How to take Dawood’s confession, his pleas and his reaching out for Kris after ten years and one night and a morning that had broken Kris in ways he didn’t know he stillcouldbreak.

He hadn’t known that he could point a gun at the love of his life, either, but—apparently—he could.

Could he pull the trigger? If Dawood moved, if he tried anything?

Were there any right decisions in the world anymore? Between love and hate, destiny and choice, death and life and thousands of ghosts, was there anything left that wasright?

Dawood was still frozen, staring at Kris. His face had gone blank. Acceptance lay heavy in his gaze, the weight of fate and destiny across his soul. “I love you,” he whispered. “I love you so much. You have always been the moon inside my darkness.”

Kris blinked fast. Tears burned his eyes, his soul. “You have ten minutes to run. Get as far from here as you can. Forget your plans. Forget your apocalypse. Forget everything you came here for. It’s the only thing I’ll give you. You haveonechance to get away. Because in ten minutes, the entire world will be chasing you.”

“I’m not going to stop. I’m going to find this mole somehow. And I’ll do everything I can to stop this attack. Whatever it is. Whatever they want me to do. I won’t do it. I’ll die first.”

“Get the fuck away from here, Dawood. Go back to Yemen. To Afghanistan. To your son. Just get the fuck away from here, and from me.”

“That’s not the path I’m on. I must follow the path Allah has laid out for me. I must.”

“When they find you, they’re going to kill you. You’re listed as ‘extremely dangerous’ in the APB. They will execute you. Just get out of here!” he screamed through gritted teeth.

“I swore to protect the homeland,” Dawood breathed. “I swore with you, in your arms, sixteen years ago.Bismillah, I will never give that up.” Dawood looked away. Closed his eyes. “Kris… after this… after everything… Will you be happy? With— with Dan?”

His throat closed. He couldn’t breathe. Couldn’t speak. The pistol shook in his clenched hands.

“In shaa Allah, all I want for you is to be happy,ya rouhi. After me. After everything. If that’s Dan…” Dawood hissed, like he’d taken a knife to the heart. “Iloveyou. Always.”

“Go,” Kris whispered. “Go now. You have nine minutes.”

Chapter 32

University Park, Maryland