Page 196 of Whisper

Damn it, wasn’t that exactly how Kris had felt? The world wasn’t worth living in without David. It hadn’t been, for a decade. He wilted, slumping, and his headthunkedagainst the door.

“Ever since I found out you were alive… I can’t think.” David trembled, curling forward. “Every thought I have comes screeching to a halt, crashing against the knowledge that you’re here. You’re alive. You’ve been alive all this time.”

Two for two on that. It was like David was saying the thoughts forming in Kris’s mind. But hadn’t they always been linked in that way? Hadn’t David and he always shared a soul, shared a mind? Finished each other’s thoughts, each other’s sentences. Would a decade apart truly change that?

“Why are you back? Why now?”

David inhaled, shakily. “I had to come.”

“But why—”

Knocking pounded on the door behind Kris. He flew forward, spinning, his heart in his throat. He was going to die of a heart attack, murdered by too many fucking surprises. Too many uninvited guests at his home. “Who is it?” he shouted.

“Kris, it’s me.”

Fuck. Dan. Kris’s gaze bounced from the door to David. David frowned, confusion unfurling as he stared back.

But, of course. David didn’t know that Dan and Kris were on the cusp of something, that David had interrupted his big grand gesture to Dan, his hanging up of his jock and his condoms and trying to settle in for round two of the good life.

“Kris… I’ve been thinking about you all day. This afternoon…. You’re scaring me, Kris. Please, let me in. Can we talk? I want to help you.”

“I’m fine, Dan. Really. It’s okay.”

“Please.” He heard Dan sigh. “Please, just let me see you. I’m frantic over you right now. I’m so sick, thinking I pushed someone I love into this. God, Kris, I’m so sorry—”

Confusion on David’s face bloomed, morphing to shock, to realization. To agony.

He had to get rid of Dan. Right now.

“You didn’t do anything, Dan. It wasn’t you. I promise.”

“Open the door, please. Just let me see you.”

He made sure the chain lock was on. Reached for the doorknob and sighed. He glanced over his shoulder. David had disappeared from the couch. There was no way Dan could see over Kris’s shoulder and into his studio, could spy David back from the dead.

He wasn’t ready for Dan—or anyone—to know, not yet.

Maybe David would disappear again. Maybe they’d say the goodbye they never got to say. Maybe David was riding off into the sunset and Kris was just one stop on his goodbye tour. What did ten years as a dead man do to a man? Did the same person come back?

He cracked his front door. Pressed his face into the opening. “I’m fine, Dan.”

Dan looked him up and down, taking in his same clothes, rumpled and stained. His exhaustion, warring with the adrenaline of finding David in his apartment. “I didn’t mean what I said earlier. That I couldn’t be a part of your healing. Don’t think that I’m walking away from you. I’mnot. I never will. I just want you to be okay.”

“I’m— I’m fine. I’m going to be fine. I will.” He nodded, ridiculous bobs of his head up and down. He had no idea what he was saying.

“Kris…”

David appeared, hidden behind the door, out of sight. Rage thundered through his gaze, primal purpose. Lightning flashed in his eyes. “He’sbusy,” David growled. He slammed his palm against Kris’s door and shoved it closed, right in Dan’s face.

Kris heard Dan’s gasp, his choked-off shout of surprise, muffled through the closed door. “Why did you—”

David grabbed him, spun him. Pressed him against the door. His hands squeezed Kris’s shoulders and his legs pressed against his, from feet to thighs. Every part of David trembled.

He stared into Kris’s eyes, every emotion roiling within him laid bare. Like sixteen years before in Afghanistan, when David had finally let Kris see into his soul, had let him see how he truly felt before their very first kiss. Agony, anguish, heartache. Confusion. Anger.Need.

Desire. Hunger.

Love. So much love.