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chaos and calm

M y friends didn’t hesitate to make fun of the marks on my neck, unfortunately one on either side.

“Who gave it to you, Cinth?” Lin smirked.

“Yeah, just tell us, we won’t tell.” Jamiel laughed.

“Shut up,” I muttered.

“Did Cel give it to you?” Iri teased.

I felt my body heat up at the thought of Celestine’s icy lips against my hot neck, on my stomach, the way she looked up at me… “Drop it,” I said and they did for the moment, but pestered me about it again later.

I hadn’t seen Celestine for a couple days, since she had dinner with Niko and me. It wasn’t unusual for her to skip; I don’t think she’s actually ever attended a full week of school. Due to her narcolepsy, there are days where she isn’t able to leave her bed at all.

She announced her arrival during lunch by throwing an apple at my head, while I was waiting for my friends to finish paying for their meals. I caught it and turned to her. “I forgot you exist.” I tossed her apple back to her.

“Angels above, Cinth, how fast are your reflexes?” Iri asked me.

Very fast. “I was lucky,” I replied .

Celestine looked drained. Her usual glow wasn't there, a bit of sweat coated her forehead and her half-lidded eyes more droopy than usual. “I know you dream about me.” She stood close to me.

Was she guessing? Or did she actually know?

“Oh my gods, you actually do dream about me?” she laughed. “What am I doing in them?”

“Uh,” I hesitated and felt my face heat up, I had to think of something quick. “I’m killing you in my dreams and you’re killing me in my nightmares.”

“Sure,” she said, usually this is the part where she would leave, but she stayed and stared blankly at my hand holding my drink. I wasn’t hungry today.

Jamiel put a hand on my shoulder and shook his head. “You should have just kept your mouth shut, Cinth.”

“I’m getting severe second-hand embarrassment right now,” Iri said.

"It's your birthday today," she whispered.

I blinked. "How did you know that?"

Not even my friends knew.

Celestine reached for my wrist and put her weight onto me as she swayed a bit, the apple slipped out of her hand and rolled away across the floor.

“Are you good?” I asked. She was growing pale–paler than usual and her eyes were fading.

Before she could answer, Iri handed Jamiel her food, putting her arm around Celestine to help hold her up. “Cel.” She pulled her away from me. “Let's take you to the nurse.”

Celestine didn't argue, leaning her weight on Iri as they walked out of the cafeteria. Her limp was much more prominent today.

“She looked like she was about to pass out,” Jamiel said.

“Yeah,” I said, watching as they turned the corner out of the room.

“Come on, Iri will tell us what's happened.” Jamiel nodded towards the door leading outside, but I didn't move. “Or you can follow them.”

I snapped my head towards him. “Why would I care enough to do that?” I muttered following Jamiel to our usual table, Lin already there.

“You guys took your time.” Lin was stuffing his face with a sandwich. “Where's Iri?”

“Taking care of Cel, she looked sick,” Jamiel replied.

“What? What happened?” Lin gasped.

Jamiel shrugged. “No idea.”

Iri didn't get back from the nurse's office until our class started. “What happened with Cel?” Lin asked.

She shook her head. “She passed out right when we got to the nurse's office and I thought it was just her narcolepsy, but when the nurse and I were helping her get into the bed, we saw this bruise on her thigh, under her skirt. When we looked… There were so many bruises on her body.”

When Celestine and I train, I never let anyone touch her. Ever. She's too young and small to be injured and one blow could be fatal on her or worse, ruin her entire career. She already had a permanent knee injury and didn’t need another one on top of it.

“They were all over her body,” Iri said. “And they were huge. The principal had to come in too.”

“Who would have done that to her?” Lin gasped.

“I know right? She's so small, she looks like a kid,” Iri commented.

She’s right, it’s highly unlikely Reaper would get assaulted on the streets because of how young she looked, especially considering her height. On top of that, not many people knew what the Grim Reaper looked like, most people assumed she was in her late-twenties. Silias. Was this Silias's doing?

“Well, did you ask her?” Jamiel asked .

“She was still out, and the principal made me leave.”

“Hyacinth.” I turned to the teacher behind me. “Come with me.”

“Why?”

“The principal wants to see you.”

Oh, bloody hell.

I walked behind the teacher slowly, not ready for this interrogation, but I know I didn't do it. There were a few teachers inside already, along with two security guards.

“Hello, Hyacinth,” the principal greeted.

I took the seat directly across from her, feeling all their stares.

The principal sat back in her seat. “I'd like you to tell me your relationship with Celestine.”

“Complicated,” I muttered.

“Complicated?” she repeated, “un-complicate it.”

I shook my head. “If you're trying to figure out if I was the one who gave her all those bruises, it wasn't me.”

“How do you know about her injuries?” She acted as if she got me.

“Because Iri, the girl who brought her to the nurse, is one of my closest friends,” I snapped.

The principal squinted her eyes at me, unappreciative of my tone. “So, you wouldn't hurt Celestine at all?”

“No.”

It didn’t look like she believed me. “I know you and Celestine have a rather rocky relationship and recently you two have been getting close, but–”

“Why don’t you ask her for the story before you go and accuse me?”

“I haven’t accused you of anything, Hyacinth, but we will.” She nodded. “You can go back to class now. ”

I stood up, shoving my hands in my pockets and left the room. I headed towards the nurse's office and found the nurse gone and Celestine laying on one of the beds. She turned to me but avoided my eyes, pulling the sheets over her face.

“Who hurt you?” I walked to the side of the bed.

“I'm fine,” she mumbled under the sheet. “I’m just sleepy.”

I yanked the sheet off and began tugging her top up. There was a slight grimace on her face at my touch.

“What are you doing?” she asked, pushing at my hand, but I was stronger and she was significantly weaker than normal to put up much of a fight.

I hesitated for a single moment. What gave me the right?

With my other hand, I took her wrists and held them in place.

Finally, I could look at her stomach. The bruises were completely black and the size of my hand, I lifted her top a bit more to see the edge of another.

I've seen worse injuries, but even on Niko I never had this sick feeling in my stomach.

“How many bruises?” I asked in a whisper. These were done by someone who knew what they were doing, inflicting enough damage to cause pain but not enough to break anything.

Celestine turned her head away from me, letting her hair cover her face. “Stop, Cinth.”

I gently grazed my finger over the dark marks. “Did it happen the same night you had dinner with Niko and me?”

She nodded, biting her lower lip.

“Was it Silias?”

“No,” she snapped. “It wasn't. They wore masks, I don’t know who they were.”

“Then?” I urged. “Why didn’t you fight back?”

She’s talented enough to take anyone down, I’ve seen it .

“They surprised me and… I froze.” Her voice cracked, like she hated herself for even saying it.

I pulled her top back down and put the blanket back over her. “What did they do to you?”

She shook her head. “I don’t remember it all.” Her mind protected her.

“What do you remember?” I urged.

It took a moment for her to answer. “Nothing,” she muttered.

I didn't understand. Why would anyone jump her? Why did she freeze? “Do you know why they did it?”

“No.”

I cupped her cheek with my hand, and she leaned into it, closing her eyes. “Don’t lie to me.”

Celestine finally met my eyes and told me.

Her memory was short and choppy. She was walking from the station, when two people in ski masks assaulted her.

They pulled her into an alleyway and called her Stygian scum– disgusting racial slur –demanding she tell them everything she knew about Vulture.

They left her bloodied and bruised, but didn’t touch her face because it was ‘too pretty to touch’ and she ‘wouldn’t be worth anything without it.

’ The twins were the ones to find her, and she spent the last few days recovering.

My veins ran cold. She’s being targeted because of me. It’s supposed to be the opposite, she’s supposed to be protected by being associated with me. But why her? I’ve never had this problem with Iri, Lin, and Jamiel. Was it because they knew she would know more?

She’s not safe.

“So it was because of me that this happened?”

“No,” she whispered, “it wasn't.”

“But they only questioned you about me.”

“I didn’t tell them anything about you. ”

I trust she didn’t. “I wouldn’t have been upset if you did, they hurt you.” I’d rather her tell them everything she knew, than go through something like that again.

“I would never do that to you.” She let out a shaky breath. “I’m so tired of this.”

I gently brushed her hair out of her face. “Tired of what?”

She had a completely emotionless expression, but her eyes welled with tears. “They gave me this name, the Grim Reaper, but it doesn’t mean anything. No one respects me.”

Even though she was almost as powerful as I am and–especially at the rate she’s going–will one day be my equal, there was a big difference between how people treated me compared to her.

I’m not really sure what it is, if it’s because she’s new or a girl or young or maybe because she doesn’t look scary.

“I respect you.”

“Do you?”

I nodded. “You’re one of the few people I actually respect.” Then, I added, “but you shouldn’t use fear.” That wouldn’t work for her. “You should get people to adore you.” Like what Siren does.