Page 8 of When It Reins (Three Rivers Trevors Ranch #5)

mitch

I don’t want to be here, but when your brother, who you’re trying to reconnect with, asks you to come help him, it’s not easy saying no.

“What crawled into your bed and shit in it?” my little brother, Jax, asks, watching Logan and me get a horse ready.

“Nothing.” I glare at him, angry that he’s calling me out. It is hard for me to open up to my family. It’s always been something I wasn’t good at. I was always the one out of the four of us that kept to myself.

It’s the whole reason I started to play the guitar. It was something I could do when we would go to bonfires when we were in high school, something I could contribute to the group without having to talk to everyone.

Since being home, it seems like my family is tired of me not talking, but none of them ever pushes me.

Except Jax.

He and I were the closest growing up, and he and I had the worst of the falling out when I was away. Now, he’s the one that pushes me the hardest.

“You seem in a foul mood,” Jax comments, throwing a handful of trail mix into his mouth.

“I’m not,” I answer, my words gruff.

But unfortunately, my little brother is right. I am pissed.

I’d gone to work at the bar the last two days, and Juniper wasn’t there. Finally, I overheard Annmarie mention how nice it was that she and David got away for a weekend.

I had gone from mildly concerned to downright pissed in seconds.

The tool bag took her away?

My concern with that, other than the feelings I am loath to admit to myself, is that he is doing that to cover something up or hide something from Juniper that he doesn’t want her to know.

I was partially right, which made me feel justified, when a group of people came out to survey the land. Loki was on top of it, being that his family was from that particular area, and he wasn’t in any kind of mood to deal with people coming in and taking over.

Another part was that the land is right next to a lot the club owns that we use for…recreational purposes.

“You ready?” Logan, who is the most laid back of us brothers, takes the lead rope from my hand and leads the pretty little palomino into the arena.

I follow, waiting for him to tell me what he needs. I know that he could use Jax for whatever he needs, that Jax is just as talented around a horse as the rest of us, but this is Logan’s olive branch, and I was determined to make things right with my big brother.

In the arena, I hold the horse’s halter and watch my brother move around it, moving the stirrups and running his hand over the body of the horse.

The horse seems content with what he’s doing.

They have a nice little system here that they’ve put in place over the last couple of years. My little brother, Stetson, trains the babies. From the time they are little to the time they are two or three, he does the groundwork, getting them ready for saddles and riding.

Then Logan takes over, getting them trained on the basics, which includes the first official saddling and rides. Logan has the job of getting bucked off the most.

Then CT, our cousin through marriage, does the training and showing. He is the new world champion of cow horse as of last year, and since winning, he has been steadily building up more and more clientele.

I have been asked to join the business multiple times, but something is holding me back. It’s been a while since I was on a horse that didn’t want to buck me off, though I leaned more toward the bull riding side of things.

“All right, here we are.” Logan comes up on the left side of the horse and rubs her hip while he lifts and puts his foot in the stirrup.

I bend the horse’s neck a little, showing her what he is doing, and she, like a good girl, watches calmly as he pulls himself up to lean over the saddle, giving her his weight.

She takes an unsteady step, unfamiliar with the way it feels, and I let her move a little. She shows no signs of taking off, and I hold steady, watching her carefully.

Logan does this several times, stepping up and then down, moving the stirrups so they touch her belly, and pulling away.

“She’s a good one, huh?” I ask, watching Logan take a breath. He is taking a minute. Getting up and down in the saddle like that is a workout.

“Very.” He nods his head toward her again and says, “All right. I think I’ll swing on and have you pony us for a minute.”

I glance at her. “You don’t want a hackamore or anything?”

“Nah, I trust you can handle her.” Logan looks at me then, and I take a breath, nodding at him.

He takes his time swinging on to her, and she gives a little jolt as she feels his full weight come down on top of her. I lead her in small circles, keeping watch for any sign that she is going to lose it, and see a calm, very focused horse.

“Let’s let her go out a bit more,” Logan says, letting me have full control over the situation.

I let the lead rope go a little, and Logan and I both encourage her to leave my side a little, making her go in a circle around me.

She gets a little excited and starts to trot for a minute, and I let her do that in circles around me, Logan just along for the ride.

After a few more minutes, he has me stop and pull her in, where she lets him get down without a fuss. I rub her head, congratulating her, and Logan hits my shoulder.

“Good work.” He grins at the mare and rubs a hand over her neck as I hand the lead rope to him. “She’s gonna be a good one.”

I nod my head, following them out. Jax joins us outside the arena, smiling like a proud mom, and I have to refrain from rolling my eyes. “I’m so proud of you both.”

“You know, you’re much more annoying now that you found happiness,” I grumble, moving past him to talk to Logan.

“You mean charming, adorable, cheerful? That’s what happens when you take a leap of faith for love.”

His words hit the mark he was intending to, and I glare at him.

“Leave him alone, Jax,” Logan says, shaking his head at him. “I swear, you’re trying to get him to hit you.”

“I don’t hit easy targets,” I reply, leaning against the stalls and watching Logan untack his horse.

Logan chuckles, and I watch him and Jax banter back and forth. The barn is a bustle of activity at the other end of it. There are two or three people cleaning and mucking stalls, and another just led a horse into the arena for exercise.

I was feeling…slightly jealous at the way everyone here seems to so smoothly fit in. I am jealous, because deep down, I want to be a part of all of it.

But on the surface of things, I’m not ready to admit that.

I’m not ready to admit a lot of things—if I ever do.

“You should come back tomorrow. I’ve got a feral little sorrel that I could use your help with.” Logan’s statement shocks me, and I stand a little straighter, wondering if I am going to be a coward and claim I am busy, or if I am going to actually take the offer.

“I have some—” I break off when I see Logan pause his movements, and even though he isn’t looking at me, I have a feeling he is bracing himself for disappointment.

Is this what I want? Do I want to disappoint my family all the time? Or am I going to man up and face them?

“Okay,” I answer, then scratch the back of my neck. “I can come in the morning before going to the bar.”

Logan’s body visibly relaxes, and I feel like a jerk. He already has his doubts about me, and those were my doing. I put those thoughts in his head.

Now, it is my job to try to erase them.