Page 23

23

Prism

Our bedroom seemed a lot smaller with nineteen people squished inside.

But it was a crowd I didn’t mind.

All eight couples plus Arsen’s parents—my soon-to-be in-laws—and Gram were here, and everyone was wearing pajamas.

A pajama wedding in the middle of the night was kind of perfect, wasn’t it? At least to me. I could barely wrap my head around it. I’d spent the entire day in survival mode, worried Arsen was fuming at me. Worried he’d finally had enough. Worrying my brother and sister getting married would somehow leave me alone—even if, logically, I knew that wouldn’t happen. It was hard to argue with feelings, though, wasn’t it?

There really wasn’t much mind over matter when it came to me because emotion ruled all.

But Arsen ruled my emotion. Loved me so good that nothing else mattered.

When I woke up this morning, with snow-capped mountains as my view, the last thing I expected was to get married.

But here I was.

Here we were.

Surrounded by the only people who mattered to me, with Senator Andrews— no. Bennett. With Bennett standing in front of us all, his back to the massive darkened windows, dressed in a pair of pin-striped navy-blue satin pajamas and a pair of slippers. In his hand was a single sheet of paper, with all the others lined up on a small table nearby, a single pen lying on top.

In just a few minutes, I wouldn’t be Matthew Miller Prism anymore. I never would be again.

I’d be Matthew Miller Andrews.

*insert heart emoji here* Make sure it’s the red one.

Red is the color of love, after all.

“Are we ready to begin?” Bennett asked.

Off to the side, Gram sniffled, and I looked over to see her dabbing her eyes with the thick fur trim on the sleeves of the velvet robe belted at her waist. Her pajamas were satin too, and her slippers had the same fur trim as her robe.

Christina appeared, a tissue box in her hand, and held it out. Gram took one, offering her a watery smile.

“Watch out. Coming through!” Jamie called as he and Ryan carried an upholstered wingback into the bedroom.

“What the hell are you wearing, Owens?” Coach wanted to know as the guys set the chair off to the side.

Jamie looked down at himself. “You mean you don’t know? Isn’t this from like your era?”

Coach’s face darkened. “ Frosty the Snowman came out in nineteen sixty-nine. I ain’t that old.”

“So you do know it,” Jamie surmised.

Coach muttered under his breath, and Bodhi snickered. “Why are you wearing Frosty the Snowman pajamas to a wedding?”

“Arsen said to wear PJs. These are my PJs. Maddie got them for me. Christmas is in a couple weeks.” Jamie defended himself.

“Let’s just be thankful it’s not a onesie,” Max muttered.

Madison giggled. Her pajamas looked like Jamie’s but had Rudolph and the Bumble on them.

Jamie glanced at me. “Frosty can come to your wedding, right, bro? You want me to change?”

“I like them,” I mused, looking at his broad-shouldered, six-three frame wrapped in light-blue flannel pajamas with Frosty all over them. It even had his corn cob pipe. “I might get Arsen a pair.”

Arsen made a choked sound. I glanced at him and smiled. He winked.

“Y’all gonna be one of those couples that send Christmas cards with you wearing matching PJs, P?” Kruger mused. “That’s wholesome.”

“You can’t call him P after tonight.” Arsen reminded him.

That seemed kinda like a big adjustment. I mean, almost everyone called me by my last name. But for once, it was a change I was excited about.

“So we good?” Jamie asked, gesturing to his pajamas.

I nodded.

“We’ll be right back,” Jamie said, gesturing for Ryan.

The pair got another wingback, setting it right beside the other they’d hauled in.

“Ma’ams.” Ryan gestured to Gram and Christina and then to the chairs. “Please have a seat.”

“Well, aren’t you two just charismatic?” Gram mused.

“Shall we?” Bennett said when the ladies were sitting.

“Wait!” Rory called and raced from the room. Seconds later, the string lights on the back deck lit up, illuminating the view from our window. It sort of looked like gazing into a snow globe, the golden glow only lighting up a small area while beyond remained dark with the night. Snow fell at a moderate pace, flurrying sideways and sticking to the deck railing and every surface outside.

Coupled with the warm light from the string lights above our bed, we stood there with our family in a halo of gold.

Rory rushed back in, her camera in hand and a smile on her flushed cheeks. “Sorry. But I thought it would be so beautiful to have the lights glittering through the window while you said your vows.” She held up the camera. “This might be spontaneous, but good pics are always a good idea.”

I glanced at Arsen. “Vows?” Nerves multiplied inside me, and I tapped the outside of my leg. One. Two. Three. One. Two. Three. “I don’t have vows ready.” And coming up with them on the spot was a bit daunting. I mean, I knew how I felt about Arsen. I felt it with my whole heart and chest, but putting that into words?

Hell, I had to text him my answer to his proposal.

And now there was a room full of people.

Warm palms swallowed my cheeks, and the brush of the cool metal of the rings on his fingers felt nice. “Hey,” he murmured, his voice just for me.

Have I mentioned it’s my favorite sound?

“We don’t need to do vows. You just have to stand here and repeat after Dad, then say I do. Okay?”

“You deserve better than that,” I said, the nerves inside me snowballing. What if this was a mistake? Not the marrying part but marrying now, like this. I mean, look at Ben. He was putting together a whole wedding. Food, decorations… Hell, we were at some massive chalet. He was writing vows.

What was I doing?

Standing here in Arsen’s checked Burberry pajamas and slippers. I didn’t even have a ring.

I gasped, the force of it pulling me away from his hands. “I don’t have a ring!” I glanced around, suddenly overwhelmed. “We can’t get married, Arsen. I don’t even have a ring for you.”

He grabbed me again. “Easy,” he murmured, toes bumping against my slippers. He swayed in, the flannel covering his thighs brushing against me. “Look at me, princess.”

I listened, eyes latching on to him like a lifeline. Probably because he was my lifeline. The only person I looked for now when my insides got stirred up.

“We don’t need rings.”

“Yes, we do,” I whispered.

He frowned. Then his eyes lit up. Pulling away, he reached for his hand, tugging off the silver band he always wore on his thumb. “You like wearing my stuff, right?” he asked, holding it up. “How about I give you this one? Might be a little big, but it will be okay until I can get it sized.”

Biting into my lower lip, I looked at the offering. I did like wearing his stuff. Eating off his plate, drinking from his glass. I liked anything of his. So the idea of wearing one of his rings was sort of perfect.

“But I don’t have one to give to you,” I said, forlorn.

Someone cleared their throat. “I could probably help with that.”

I glanced at Max, and he nodded. “Brought my tattoo kit.”

“Yes,” Arsen said instantly.

I looked back at Arsen. “You’d wear a tattoo for your wedding ring?” I questioned. “It’s permanent.”

“Just like how I feel about you.”

Oh.

He must have taken my silence for apprehension because he said, “But you can still get me a ring if you want. I’ll wear it too.”

Pushing up on tiptoes, I hugged him tight, squeezing my eyes closed and just wallowing in all the things this man was willing to do for me. “Can we get married now?” I asked.

“I mean, I’ve been waiting,” he mused, taking my hand and leading me over so we were in front of his father, standing face to face.

“We are gathered here in the middle of the night, in the presence of family and pajamas…” Bennett began, his voice confident and settling over the entire room. It even calmed some of the excitement popping inside me like popcorn.

This is right. This is where I belong.

“For the joyous union of Arsen Aaron Andrews and Matthew Miller Prism in blessed matrimony. This union between these two hearts is not to be taken impetuously but reverently. Love and life are gifts the universe bestows upon us and are made even greater when two people find home with each other. May your union always be blessed with patience, understanding, and tolerance as well as passion and excitement for each other and the life you create. Remember, needing one another is not a weakness but a strength. May your loyalty, want, and mutual trust in one another never wane, and may you continually rediscover your love for each other until your hearts no longer beat. And even after the body gives out, let your love remain, a glow somewhere in the universe just like the glow you are uniting under.”

I glanced over at the lights, their radiance blurring a little as my throat grew thick.

Sensing my swollen heart, Arsen reached for my hand, linking ours together and offering a gentle squeeze. I looked back at him and smiled.

“If anyone knows of any reason why these two should not be united, speak now or forever hold your peace.”

“Wait!”

Well, it had been going so well.

“Kruger! What the fuck?” Ryan hissed.

“I just need a minute,” my brother said, rushing from the room.

We all stood there in stunned silence. My heart clenched as I watched the empty doorway, waiting for him to come back.

Did he not believe me when I swore against bro code that this was what I wanted? When I promised marrying Arsen tonight would make me happy? Was he mad? Did he somehow feel betrayed?

I couldn’t stomach it. Pulling my hands from Arsen’s, I turned to the door just as Kruger came running in.

“I’m back! Sorry,” he said, his voice muffled under the fabric he was pulling over his head. “I couldn’t do it, P. I mean, A.” He grimaced. That was gonna take some getting used to. Kruger jerked the fabric down, smoothing it out over his midsection.

I stared.

We all did.

Kruger shook his head. “I couldn’t let you get married while I wore pajamas. I had to change.”

My eyes got watery again, the pink T-shirt he wore morphing into a blob. The word Bro written across the chest was nothing but a white blur. That was the T-shirt he’d made me when I first got with Arsen, when I first came out to Elite.

He wore that stupid pink T-shirt around all the time, wanting to make sure I knew that he one hundred percent supported me.

I never thought weddings were emotional, bro.

Until I met mine.

With a sob, I launched myself at him, hugging him tight and pressing my face against his neck.

“Sorry I was a jerk before,” he said, patting my back. “You’re my ride-or-die. I had to make sure you really wanted me to call you Andrews now and not Prism. I just want you to be happy, and it’s obvious you’re over the moon. I’m proud of you, P. I’ll always be here for you, bro.”

A tear squeezed out, and I swiped it across his shoulder when I pulled back. The heat on my face told me it was red, and I had a hard time making eye contact. The feel of everyone else’s eyes in the room made the rest of me feel hot too.

“Thank you, Ben.”

“You’re welcome. Now go on. Go get married to Mr. Right over there. I guess he’ll be an okay brother-in-law. You’re the only one I’d let get married before me.”

I laughed, but it was sort of like a sob.

Across the room, Gram blew her nose, but I didn’t dare look. “My God, I love those boys,” I heard her tell Christina.

“So there aren’t actually any objections?” Bennett asked when I turned back to Arsen.

Smiling, Arsen leaned in to swipe the wetness off my cheek. I love you, he mouthed.

“Tell them they can kiss already!” Bodhi called.

“Bro. You should consider a career in marrying people. You’re a natural,” Kruger told him.

“Shhh!” Landry shushed everyone. “Let them get married.”

Madison gasped. “ Oh. My. God . Are you wearing an engagement ring?”

Everyone turned.

Landry covered her hand, ducking her face. Rush grinned like he’d won the lottery.

“I didn’t want to say anything until after this wedding,” Landry confessed. “And before the next one.”

“What the fuck, Rush? You trying to one-up me too?” Kruger hollered.

“Congratulations!” Jess exclaimed, rushing over to hug Landry.

“I guess you were next!” Rory laughed.

Arsen cleared his throat. “This is great and I’m happy for you, but we were in the middle of something.”

“Sorry.” Landry was sheepish. “I should have taken it off.”

“Like hell you will,” Rush growled.

Bennett cleared his throat. “If I could have the room?”

Everyone turned back.

“No more interruptions until we’re finished,” he told everyone.

Arsen nodded approvingly.

“Who gives this groom to the groom for marriage?” Bennett asked, looking at me.

“Me,” Kruger said.

“Me too,” Gram offered.

“And who gives this groom to the groom for marriage?” he asked, looking at Arsen this time.

“I do,” Christina called.

“Me too.” Bennett smiled. “We’re very proud of you both.”

I bit down on my lower lip to keep it from wobbling.

“And so by the power vested to me by the great state of Virginia, I now?—”

“Wait!” I called, shocking everyone.

“We said no more interruptions,” Jamie scolded.

“It’s his wedding,” Wes whispered.

“Oh. Right. Sorry, bro.”

Bennett glanced at me. “Matt, is there something you would like to add?”

“Yes,” I said even though I felt like throwing up.

“Matthew,” Arsen cautioned.

“Just let me say this, bear.”

Arsen pressed his lips together and nodded.

I took a breath and gazed out the window as I exhaled, watching the snow fall. Swallowing, I turned back to my almost-husband.

“I’m pretty nervous,” I confessed. “So what I want to say might be kinda awkward, but I want to try. You deserve that. You deserve so much, maybe more than I can give you.”

His face changed like the wave of the emotion pummeling me was now crashing over him. “That’s not true.”

“I thought I would have to rearrange my life for you,” I blurted out, surprised I’d just started speaking but not stopping myself. “But in the end, I didn’t have to rearrange anything. You just fit. You didn’t fill in the places I was missing. You just loved me in spite of them. I thought you were chaos, but really, you’re my calm. You met me where I was, in the dark, and you didn’t even ask to turn on a light. I never…” I faltered but then straightened. “I never thought anyone would love me. I didn’t even know anyone could love like you. But here you are. My favorite sound. My favorite heart. My everything. I probably won’t ever be easy, but I promise to try, bear. I promise to try and love you as good as you love me.” My lip wobbled then and my breath shuddered. I wanted to say more, but I was out of words.

Arsen made a sound and moved in to kiss me.

His dad pushed his hand between our faces and pressed Arsen back. “Just a minute.”

“Do it right now, Dad,” Arsen practically snarled.

Bennett smiled as though his son snarling at the altar was adorable.

He was right.

It was.

“The ring, please,” Bennett prompted.

Arsen tugged the silver band off his thumb and pushed it onto my ring finger. It was loose, but it didn’t matter. It felt right.

“And the other,” Bennett said, then grimaced. “Oh, ah, I mean…”

I grabbed Arsen’s hand and kissed the finger where I would put a ring.

“I now pronounce you husband and husband.”

Arsen’s lips met mine, silencing the room and everyone in it. My heart, which had been beating as fast as hummingbird wings, slowed to a thud, and I sank into the kiss, fisting the front of his shirt and holding on as if my life depended on it.

People around us cheered.

Hard bits of something started hitting me in the side of the head and side.

I wrinkled my nose, and Arsen laughed against my lips, lifting his hand to shield my eyes so we could continue kissing.

And we did, bodies crushed together right there in the middle of the room like we were alone.

“Get a room!” Win hollered.

“This is their room,” Lars quipped.

I heard the clicking of the camera, and another chunk of something hit me in the ear. Pulling back from Arsen’s lips, I glanced around and down at the floor where white rice littered the carpet.

Laughing, I looked up at Rush who was holding a huge red box of instant rice, currently pouring some into Bodhi’s palm.

Bodhi tossed the entire handful at us.

“It was short notice,” Rush said. “It was the best I could do.”

“Congratulations,” Wes said, moving in to hug me. I hugged him back and then everyone else as they came over to congratulate us.

I never once let go of Arsen’s hand, not even when Ryan and Rush poured glasses of champagne from two bottles and passed them around.

“A toast,” Coach said, raising his glass.

Everyone followed suit.

Then, in a very unlike Coach thing to say, he said, “To happily ever after!”

Everyone cheered, glasses clinked, and the bubbles tickled my nose.

“We have some paperwork to sign.” Bennett reminded us a short while later.

Arsen picked me up and carried me across the room to set me down and hand me the pen. I signed everything and so did he. And when we were officially official, I picked up the pen one last time and signed a scrap piece of paper just because I could.

Matthew Miller Andrews

So this was happiness.