Page 93 of Vampires of Eden

Very early the next morning and before anyone in the house is stirring, I sneak downstairs, out the back double doors and over to the glass ballroom that houses the piano.

Raphael said that I could help myself, but it’s bizarre to wander freely around this estate like a welcomed guest. I slink through the courtyard like a thief, despite the fact that Raphael’s even given me a luxurious pajama set and robe to wear while I’m here.

The sky is a warm purplish blue because the sun is waking but hasn’t risen over the horizon just yet. It’s dim as I step into theglass building once more. I don’t bother trying to find the lights because I probably won’t play, I just… I want to see her again.

I approach with caution, as if I don’t want to startle her. In truth, it’s me who’s afraid. Nervous but enamored. This piano is gorgeous. The finish is a warm and rich ebony. Cautiously, I run my fingers along the key slip, not daring to touch the actual keys.

My purebred mother taught me the violin first. I wasn’t bad by any means, but I asked her if we could try the piano. She obliged and the rest was history. I took to it naturally and I loved the feel of it underneath my hands, much more so than the violin. The piano gave me a sense of power and control—to produce any range of lustrous, commanding and intricate sounds from this stunning beast of an instrument. Learning and understanding its mechanisms excited me.

The early adolescent days of my life were good. I was largely sheltered from what I would later realize about Eden—its strict classism and that it doesn’t take kindly to ranked vampires. Especially first-gen vamps who have the audacity to be mated with a purebred—as is the case with my mothers. Delinquent creatures who have failed to realize their proper place in the ancient vampire hierarchy.

My mothers eventually left Eden because of this. The treatment that my first-gen mother received—despite the affluence of our family and prestige of my purebred mother’s career—was shameful.

They wanted me to leave with them, but at the time, I was operating under the guise of “love.” I thought they were wrong about Eden. That things were changing and I’d show them as much, hand-in-hand with Josefina.

Quietly, I slide onto the piano bench, then sit still with my hands in my lap. In the past when I sat at these keys, I felt confident. They were mine to manipulate and I was self-assured in my proficiency—in everything, truly. My choices, actions and the path that I was walking in my young life.

Sitting here now, I… I’m deflated. Lost.

Lately, I don’t know what I’m doing at all.

A door clicks open across the ballroom and I turn my head toward the sound. His scent invades my senses before I see him. Cautiously, Alexander comes around the corner. He’s handsome in his pajamas and robe and his hair is neater. Much less unruly compared with yesterday. He’s made an effort, I think.

“Good morning,” he says. The slight echo of the hall carries his voice as he moves.

“Hey,” I say, unable to ignore the pleasant warmth flooding my torso and groin as he draws nearer. “Should you be out of bed? How are you feeling?”

“I think I’m alright? I feel like I’ve been sleeping for days. I needed to get up and move around.”

Lifting my wrist and drawing back the sleeve of my robe, I check my watch. “You were asleep for fifteen hours, but you’ve been sick since Saturday night.”

Standing on the steps of the small platform, he huffs. “What a fucking nightmare. Is it okay if…Do you mind if I join you?”

As a response, I slide over, making room for him on the bench. He sits beside me and I examine him more closely. The bags are still there but less intense. He looks tired, yet much improved from the zombie state he was in yesterday.

A moment of rest settles over us and we’re both quiet. His zesty scent is sweet and light again. I stare down at the keys and his presence soothes me. In the delicate silence, I shamelessly breathe him in, even though I know that I should not. I keep digging myself deeper into this hole that I’m almost certain will lead to my ruin.

“Thank you for coming to see me.” Alexander’s voice is soft. Not a whisper, but almost. I’m not sure if it’s because he’s exhausted, but it makes this moment and our interaction feel closer. Intimate despite this large fishbowl we’re occupying.

“You came to see me when I was sick,” I remind him, matching his low volume. “It’s only fair that I returned the favor.”

“I appreciate it. You stopped Raph from murdering me.”

I laugh from my throat. “Raphael means well. He has your best interests at heart.” Feeling oddly shy, I glance over to check his face. Immediately, I’m met with his pretty golden-brown eyes and a smirk.

“It was an attempted homicide. He’s fired.”

We both snicker as a hush gradually falls over us once more. Birds are chirping all around in the magnificent trees beyond the glass. The sun climbs higher into the morning sky, brightening the hall and making it radiant with light and depth and shadows.

“I’ve… been thinking a lot about what you asked me that one time.” Alexander lifts his right hand and slides his fingers across the keys, but he doesn’t press them. “If I really loved Oliver, or if I was in love with the fantasy of him. Of us, in my head.”

Folding my hands in my lap, I nod. “Have you come to a conclusion?”

He exhales a heavy sigh while still brushing his fingertips along the keys. “You know, I… I chose Oliver because on paper, we had everything in common. Our age, family background, gender and upbringing. I thought that he and I could establish a kind of… equality? In our relationship. Where we could freely be ourselves—maybe a bit like how I am with Raph. Comfortable. I painted this picture of what we would be in my head, but none of it was real. Everything that I loved was based on some nonexistent situation that wasn’t there. A circumstance that would never happen.”

The very foundation of Eden is rooted in power dynamics. Rankings, wealth and materialism, age and geographical location—like the fact that his family and others like them live amongst these lush hills, while ranked vampires live in the valleys and countryside.

These oppressive rules and constructs weigh heavily on all of us, so I can understand his wanting to escape them somehow. It would be liberating to achieve this within the privacy of aromantic partnership. Maybe it’s impossible given our cultural surroundings, but it’s an admirable desire.