Page 20

Rain

I t takes me a moment to find the words.

Xander waits beside me, silent but present, his warmth a steady comfort in the low glow of the bathroom light.

I trace a line on the blanket with my finger and say quietly, “You already know my family means everything to me.”

He nods, not rushing me.

“And you’ve probably guessed by now that I had a good childhood. My family has always been loving and caring. Neither Mama or Daddy ever used force to teach us a lesson.”

I take a breath and shift back against the headboard, mirroring his posture.

“But everything changed the summer before my senior year of high school.” I pause. “That’s when I started dating a guy. Dennis.”

I see Xander’s hands curl into fists, and my eyes begin to sting.

“At first, he was great. His family owned a small cow farm in town. My parents knew his, everyone got along. It was nice. We’d go to church together, then he’d come for Sunday lunch.

We would spend time walking through the orchard, riding our horses from his place to mine.

Everything was very innocent, you know? The kind of first love that makes you feel like you’ll die if you don’t see them, but all you ever do is kiss? ” I pause, but I don’t need a response.

“We started dating in junior year. But it was the summer… everything changed.”

Tears begin to pool. I swipe them away quickly, but Xander notices and grabs a box of tissues.

“I’ll be right back. I’m getting you some water,” he says, disappearing through the door.

I rest my head against the headboard.

Fuck. This is hard. But if I want this to work, I need to show him the ugly parts too .

“Here,” he says, returning with a bottle of water.

I smile as I open it and take a long sip. When I place it on the nightstand, I notice he brought one for himself too, still cradled in his hands.

“Anyway… that summer, Dennis started talking a lot about how all our other friends had already had sex—and how badly he wanted to.”

I pause, swallowing hard. “I usually just ignored him, tried to change the subject, but he wouldn’t drop it.

“I thought about talking to Ruin. We have no secrets, you know? We talk about everything.”

He nods, a small smile on his face, silently encouraging me to keep going.

“But at the time, she was in a rough patch with her boyfriend. She thought he was cheating on her. So I felt bad going to her, complaining that my boyfriend wanted to sleep with me when hers was sneaking around with other girls.”

I take another sip of water, stalling.

The next part is the worst. I need a moment before I can say it out loud.

“One night, we were by the creek. High school kids used to hang out there, build bonfires, and drink the beers that Laney Harris would sneak from her dad’s basement. You know… silly high school shenanigans.”

I pause again. Xander passes a tissue over my cheek. Only then do I realize I’m crying.

“Thank you,” I whisper .

He winks, and I manage a small, grateful smile.

“That night was especially beautiful. The stars were brighter than usual. Dennis said we could park his truck in a field and stargaze. We’d done something like that before, so I didn’t think anything of it.”

I breathe in slowly.

“When we got to the field, I realized we were farther out than ever before. He grabbed blankets and pillows from the back seat and made a bed in the truck bed. We lay there, holding hands. It was nice for a while—just talking, watching the sky.”

My voice thins. “Then we started kissing, and it felt good. I was happy.”

I glance at Xander, but he stays silent, giving me space.

“When he started touching me, alarm bells went off in my head. But I didn’t stop him—it still felt… okay. Until he started unbuttoning my skirt. I froze and told him I wanted to go home.”

Xanders stills, his attention razor-sharp.

“He sneered at me. Tried again. I said no, over and over, but he wouldn’t stop. He said he was done waiting. That he was going to get what he had earned after waiting so long for it.”

My breath shudders. “I dug my nails into his arms, tried to scratch him, to shove him off—and that’s when he slapped me.”

Xander’s arms are around me instantly. I lean into him, resting my head on his shoulder as the next words tumble out, broken and raw.

“He slapped me again. And again. Until I stopped fighting. Then he pulled down my skirt… and my underwear… and got on top of me.”

His arms tighten around me, grounding me as my voice shakes.

“He put his hand on my throat and said he would choke me to death if I kept fighting him. So I didn’t.”

The sobs rip through me. I’m crying uncontrollably, and Xander rocks us gently, back and forth, holding me through it all.

“It’s okay, my sweet, wild cherry. You’re safe with me. I got you,” he whispers into my hair again and again as I let years of anger, fear, and heartbreak finally leave my chest.

At some point, I notice Xander’s shirt is damp—not from my tears, but his.

I lift my head to look at him. Xander’s crying. For me. For what I went through.

More tears fall, but my voice is steady now when I whisper, “Thank you for being here.”

He doesn’t respond with words, just holds me tighter, whispering sweet nothings and kisses on my hair. We sit like that—quiet, close—until the worst of the storm passes.

Eventually, my sobs subside. I place a kiss on Xander’s arm and gently pull away from his embrace .

“Do you want to finish the story? Or do you want to rest?” he asks, tender and patient.

Rearranging my position, I say, “I want to tell you the rest.”

He nods. I finish the last sip of water, then continue.

“When he was done, he put his pants back on and climbed into the truck. He started driving, and I just lay there, in the truck bed. Crying. Shivering. I was in denial. How could something like that happen to me? Why didn’t I stop him?

I knew better. Mama had given me the talk.

No means no. It was my choice, not his. But I let him. ”

The tears come again, and Xander wraps his arms around me.

“This wasn’t on you, Rain,” he says, voice rough with emotion. “He’s a piece of shit who forced you to do something you didn’t want. I hope he’s in prison.”

“He’s not,” I whisper. “He stopped the truck at the orchard’s entrance and told me to get out. Said if I told anyone, he would kill me. That I was his whore now. Damaged goods. That no one else would ever want me.”

Xander goes still beside me. Tense. Quiet. Rage simmering beneath the surface.

I inhale deeply, trying to steady myself.

“I put my clothes back on as fast as I could. As I was getting out of the truck, River happened to be coming. He saw me—bruised, blood running down my thighs—and without a word, he got out of his truck and dragged Dennis out of his. ”

Xander’s jaw flexes, but he says nothing.

“River didn’t let him speak. Just hit him. Over and over, until Dennis was barely conscious. Then he let him drop on the road. He gave me his jacket, told me to stay in his truck, and made a phone call.”

I swallow hard.

“A few minutes later, Dennis’s dad showed up. I couldn’t hear what they said—I was half-asleep by then—but they were yelling.”

My voice softens as the memory sharpens.

“The next morning, I woke up in my bed. Ruin and I shared a room back then, and I panicked. I didn’t know how I’d explain all this to her. But she wasn’t the first person I saw. It was River.”

I faint smile tugs at my lips.

“He hugged me. Told me Dennis and his family were leaving town. That I’d never have to worry about him again. I cried and cried, but my brother promised I was safe now.”

I look at Xander, bracing for judgment. For disappointment.

“Did you ever go to the police?” he asks gently.

I shake my head. “I didn’t want River to go to jail for hitting Dennis so bad. And… I thought it was my fault. I didn’t want Daddy or Mama to know. I was too embarrassed.”

I wait for him to tell me how dumb I was for letting Dennis get away with it.

But he just says, “I’m so fucking sorry that happened to you, Cherry.”

His voice is soft. His touch is gentle. He keeps holding me like I’m something precious, not broken.

“It was ten years ago,” I whisper. “And every time I tried to date someone after that… I couldn’t get past the horror of that night. So I stopped trying. I became the sassy twin. Built a wall between me and every man who came near me.”

He lets out a low breath. “I hate that what he did is the reason for your sass. But I gotta be honest—I fucking love all your sass.”

That makes me laugh, a true belly laugh.

Xander laughs too, loosening his hold as we both shake with it. I collapse onto the bed, still laughing, letting the last of the tears fall.

We just lie there next to each other, fully clothed. No expectations. Just quiet peace. And now that he knows my horror story, and didn’t judge me or run away, I know I can trust him. Maybe even be with him. Someday.

And for the first time in a long time, I don’t feel afraid of what comes next. I’m filled with a quiet, terrifying hope that love might still be possible.