Page 14

Chapter Fourteen

Summerville Bodie

B odie walks into the apartment after another back-to-back run, and he's exhausted. Exhausted but horny. It feels like it's been too damn long since he's been able to spend real time with Jolie, but he also understands they're all doing what they need to in order to give Dax time with Dani. The fact she's alive but has been held captive for this long can't be an easy transition for either of them.

He doesn't see Jolie when he steps into the living room, but he sees unlit candles all around the room. The closer he looks at the floor and furniture, he sees rose petals. She's doing something romantic? He's totally here for it.

“Jolie?” Bodie calls. “I'm back. Do you need me to come back in a few?”

As he steps into the hallway, he sees Jolie sitting on the bed in sexy lingerie, crying.

“Jolie? What's wrong?”

Her hand lifts to halt him from advancing into the bedroom. “I was... I was looking for matches or a lighter to light the candles because I forgot to get something at the store when I picked everything else up.”

“It's okay, baby. I don't need anything over the top. I just need you.”

“I thought we promised to always be honest with each other.”

“We did.”

When her hand lifts a piece of paper from the other side of her, his heart sinks. The fucking letter.

“So, you told me you have my ex-fiancé’s heart? I just... what? Forgot?”

“Jolie-”

“I don't know what's worse. The fact you hid this from me, the fact his family knew the entire time he was never faithful, or the fact Justin clearly lied when he said he had a defective heart. He must've meant figuratively instead of literally, considering they wouldn't have given you a malfunctioning one, and he couldn't love just one woman. It really is only me that can't tell that the men I'm with, the men I fall madly in love with, are lying to me.”

He lets out a deep breath as he tries to calm his racing heart. “I'm sorry.”

“Were you ever planning on telling me this?”

“Honestly? Not really. It doesn't change anything. Not for me. Yeah, I have the organ of his that pumps blood to the rest of my body, but that's it.”

Standing, she grabs a summer dress and pulls it over her body to cover up the lingerie. This is definitely not going to go his way tonight.

“That's the reason you were attracted to me. You admitted I wasn't the type of girl you normally went for, and even your ex called out that I'm not your type. It's not because you love me, it's because Justin cared about me in some weird way. Not enough to be loyal, but enough that others knew about me, at least.”

Bodie would be lying if these same thoughts hadn't crossed his mind since getting the letter, especially with his newfound love of onion rings. “I love you, Jolie.”

“You think you love me. Just like Justin thought he did, but in the end, there's nothing that guarantees you'll be faithful. You'll stray just like he had.”

“That's not fair.”

Her hand crinkles the letter. “You lied to me. Just like he did. You never liked onions and now love onion rings. Motorcycles are kind of a moot point, but I've seen you eye up Lex's car. It all fits now.”

“I didn't lie,” he defends. “I didn't want this to come between us because I love you. Besides, how exactly do I bring up the subject. Hey, Jolie, I got a letter from your dead fiancé’s family, and guess what? He lied about his defective heart because it's now the one beating in my chest. You would've run for the fucking hills.”

The tears that fill her eyes immediately fill him with guilt. “You really don't think that much of me, do you?”

“Jolie-”

“It's a lie by omission. Yeah, I would've needed time to deal, but I love you. This, though? This right here is what makes me feel like maybe I do need to run for the hills because this is exactly how Justin reacted every time he was caught in a lie. He wasn't capable of loving me the way I need to be loved, and it seems like you aren't either. I can't trust someone who thinks hiding something that may cause me pain is the best option rather than tell me the truth.”

Panic grips at his throat. “What are you saying?”

“I'm saying I don't think I can do this, Bodie. Not if you're going to lie and think so little of me.”

He reaches for her arm as she walks by, but she pulls it out of his grasp. “Baby, please, don't go.”

“I'm done, Bodie. I can't... this is too much. Much too much. If you'd told me when you got the letter, it would have been different. But these similarities between him and you are so close I can't tell the difference anymore. And I refuse to let someone consume me like he did if they're not going to be honest with me.”

The door shuts before Bodie realizes she'd opened it, and by the time he runs out to his motorcycle, she's gone. How the hell had she disappeared like damned Houdini? Taking off, he knows he has to find her.

B odie has struck out at every location he's looked for Jolie. It's like she vanished into thin air, and he starts to panic. Without a second thought, he goes to Lex and Colt's house, finding them drinking on the back porch with the kids asleep.

“Hey,” Bodie says, hoping the panic doesn't show through in his tone. “You haven't heard from Jolie, have you?”

Colt shakes his head. “No, why?”

“What'd you do?” Lex asks, her legs resting on Colt's as the couple swings on the porch swing.

“Why do you assume I did something?”

“Because of the look on your face. If I had a dollar for every time I saw that look on a club member's face, always tied to a woman, mind you, I would be rich. Powerball rich.”

Laughing, Colt's eyebrows lift. “Is she right? Did you do something to piss off Jolie?”

“I fucked up,” he says, leaning on the railing. “But it's kind of your fault, you know.”

“Mine?” Colt asks. Bodie nods, and he narrows his eyes. “What the fuck did I do?”

“I didn't tell Jolie about the heart.”

Pulling her legs off her husband, Lex leans forward and stares hard at Bodie. “What about the heart? Your heart? Is there something wrong with it?”

“I'm fine. I just... I got a letter from the hospital passing along a letter from the donor's family.”

“And?”

“Turns out, I got Jolie's dead fiancé’s heart.”

She just blinks at him. “For real?”

“Yeah. And I came to ask you what I should do, but you were in bed with a migraine. I talked to Colt, and he agreed with my thinking that I shouldn't tell her. But then she found the letter tonight, and she left me.”

Whipping to look at her husband, she glares while he looks defensive. “You told him not to tell her?”

“I didn't think he'd be stupid enough to keep the letter!”

“Oh, we are going to have a conversation on all of the things you haven't told me now, buddy,” she says and turns back to Bodie. “Why the fuck would you keep this from her?”

“Oh, I don't know, maybe because everything with her ex has her running off to try and get herself killed? He's a ghost I can't outrun. I never met this motherfucker, and he's haunting me. But now she thinks that the only reason I'm into her is because I have this jackass's heart and that I'm going to stray with all the pretty blondes like he did.”

She shakes her head. “This other guy never cared about her feelings, and you just proved you don't either. I get you don't want to upset her, and you sure as hell want to get out of his shadow, but lying by omission is going to bite you in the ass pretty much every time. You told her that your feelings and fears matter more than hers. You're supposed to be partners in a relationship, not a dictator.”

“It is not the same thing.”

“Well, okay, let's think about this. Do you believe Justin didn't lie to Jolie about his cheating with all those blondes and having four phones simply because he never told her? Because we know she had no idea, so she wouldn't have asked him. He never denied it because it never came up. So... is he not a liar?”

“He's not a liar, but he's still scum.”

Her gaze doesn't let up on him. “Do you define lying as simply not telling the truth when asked, or do you consider lying to be keeping something from someone?”

“So not telling you what I got you for your birthday is a lie?” Colt asks.

“Yes, it is. But it’s an acceptable lie. Like telling a woman her pants don’t make her look fat, even if you think they do. Only girls can tell girls they look fat, for the record. Not telling someone something simply because you don’t want to deal with the consequences is not acceptable. It’s a coward’s way out.”

Bodie weighs what she says and says, “Fuck, it's the same thing Justin did.”

“Jolie thinks you love her because you have Justin's heart, but the truth is, she challenges you. The best old ladies don't make lives super easy for their men. It's how you keep them from straying,” Lex says. “She's good for you. Evie's a twat. A twat I won't hesitate to punch in her stupid face if she ever shows up again.”

“I think you make things pretty easy for me, babe,” Colt says.

Lifting an eyebrow, she shakes her head. “Not tonight, I'm not. Not after this. And it's true, you know. When it gets too easy for you, you create problems.”

“No, I don't.”

“Diane?”

His mouth slams shut, and Bodie knows there's something he doesn't know. “Can we get back to my relationship? Please? I can't find Jolie. I've looked everywhere I can think of.”

“Did you try the ice cream parlor?”

“On Main?”

Nodding, Lex says, “She takes the kids there when she watches them for me.”

“I can check there.” He turns to leave but stops. “Do you think it's possible she's right? That I love her simply because Justin did?”

“Let's test it,” she says, and he turns around. “The heart is an organ, so I could see changes like your taste buds or something because everything is all interconnected. Now, remember, I'm no doctor. But, did you feel any connection to the people who wrote you the letter? Do you have a longing for parents you didn't know?”

Shaking his head, Bodie says, “No, I don't feel anything towards them.”

“Personally, and this is just my belief, but I feel like Justin helped guide you to Jolie because he felt guilty. But this was always the plan. The universe knows what it's doing, so stop trying to interfere with it. Trust me, it's pointless and exhausting to try.”

“Thanks, Lex.”

“No problem,” she sighs. “I should start charging. Make a little side money.”

Bodie runs out of the backyard and races to the ice cream parlor before he gets sucked into another conversation and potentially misses his girl. Sure enough, he sees her sitting in a booth in the window and hurries inside, startling her.

“How'd you know I was here?” Jolie asks.

“The real reason I didn't want to tell you is because I was scared this would happen. That you would run,” he says, ignoring her question and sitting down across from her. “I feel like I'm always holding on for dear life while you look for reasons to run, and this would have been the perfect reason for you. It scares the shit out of me how often I've had to fight to keep you. Mostly on this planet, but also with me.”

Her eyes look at her ice cream. “That's how you really feel?”

He lets out a breath. “I feel like I'm fighting for you while I'm fighting off a ghost. I have to battle Justin every single day, first because he died and then because he lied and cheated. I have his heart, but I'm not him, Jolie. When I say I love someone, I love them. And that person is the one and only in my life. I love you, Jolie, and I want you to be the only one, but I can't keep fighting to keep you.”

“You say that-”

“Lex was right,” he cuts her off. “The universe is going to do what it's going to, regardless of how I try and interfere. It put us together for a reason, but I can't make you stay and love me if you don't want to. I can't force you to stay with me no matter how much I love you, and I have to trust that things will work out for the best. That we'll end up together like I want.”

Her eyes look up and study him. “I have trust issues.”

“No shit,” he says and laughs, leaning back in the booth. “You can go through my personal phone any time you need to. Not my work phone, but that's not personal. If you have a problem with that one, I'm gonna direct you to Lex. But, fuck, if you want a tracker on my bike so you can always see where I'm at, I'll do it. Go for it. Whatever you need me to do to prove I'm in this with you and for you, I will do it. But I need you to stop looking for reasons to walk away from me unless you really don't want to be with me. It's not fair to either of us.”

“You're right.”

The wind leaves his lungs as he stares in awe. No woman in the history of his life has ever told him he's right. “I am? Like... for real?”

His reaction earns him a chuckle, and she looks into his eyes. “I guess I'm scared. First, that you'll do what Justin did. I know it's not fair to hold his actions against you, but it's hard not to think you will after seeing Evie. I also never thought Justin would cheat, and I never expected to find what I did. It's a lot to overcome, and I promise, I don't want to find a reason to leave. I love you, too, Bodie.”

“What else are you scared of?”

Her lip quivers, but she doesn't look away like he expects. “That you don't really love me. That you think you do but will realize it was all some weird hero complex thing and go back to your ex. She and I couldn't be more opposite.”

He smiles. “I talked to Lex, and she made a good point. I don't love you because I have Justin's heart. If that were the case, I'd be longing for the parents who wrote that letter, too. I feel nothing for them. And you're good for me. You challenge me. I know that if I got sick again, you'd never let me push you away like Evie did. You'd fight me to the death to be right by my side, and you don't pull any punches. What I see is what I get, and I never realized just how much I wanted that before you.”

“You're not sick again, right?”

The concern in her tone has him out of his seat and next to her in an instant, pulling her into his arms. “No, I'm fine. But I know you'd be there if I was. And I think Justin helped intervene to stop you from jumping off that bridge by putting me there. And having me near when you decided to play in the sketchy part of town. And again, when you faced off with robbers carrying semi-automatics. But that's all he played a part in.”

“You just can't help yourself, can you?”

His lips touch her forehead. “I need you, Jolie. With me and on this planet. I've never been more scared to lose anything than the moment I met you.”

“I need you to be honest with me from now on,” she says, pulling back. “Even if you think it's going to hurt me. I need to know you'll always be the one to tell me the truth.”

“I promise.”

“Let's get matches and go home. I want to finish what I started with those candles. I have plans.”

Kissing her, his tongue slides into her mouth and tastes the sweetness from the ice cream. Pulling back, he smiles. “Yes, please!”