Page 26 of Transfiguration
That was a revelation. “They might not like me after I change. Vampires don’t normally stay with other vampires.” Those words broke his heart. He loved Sam and Con. Would that be the same after the change?
“It was always a possibility,” Max agreed.
“Your feelings for Santini changed?” They had been a thing as mortals and not lasted long together as vampires.
“He was very different as a mortal. Flighty, young, filled with curiosity and wonder.”
“Turning vampire killed all that in him?” Luca didn’t think of himself as flighty, young, or filled with curiosity. He was smart, jaded, and had adopted a lot of his lovers’ cynicism over the years.
“Not the transition as much as his sire. Though time destroys the innocence in all of us.”
“I’m not exactly a blushing bride,” Luca said, feeling the churning of his gut as the blood slowly made its way through him. The red receded, and he relaxed into the chair, letting some of the tension ease. “Is it too late to thank you for letting me have a fairly normal life?” Was he feeling sentimental?
“Normal?” Max asked, a smile of amusement tugging his lips. “You’re nearly a hundred years old. I’m uncertain normal applies to you.”
“I don’t have the trauma Sam or Rou does, or even Con.”
“There is always some trauma. Simply having your mother leave you with me was trauma. And myself being a vampire ensured I’d never be the sort of father attending baseball games or spelling bees.”
“Wasn’t really a ball game or spelling bee kid.” Luca had dealt with his mother’s leaving him in therapy. It rarely stung anymore. His life had been filled with tutors and nannies, but Max had never been absent. Luca sucked in a long breath, feeling the aches recede. Maybe he had more time? Maybe he’d have to drink from Max more often? That would be okay. Sam wouldn’t freak even with his vampire possessiveness. He’d understand.
“How are you feeling?” Max asked, his gaze assessing.
“A little clearer?” Luca closed his eyes and took several deep breaths, letting the blood work its way through. It still felt strange, and unfamiliar, like he could sense whatever magic was in it slowly chugging through his veins. When he opened his eyes, Max stared at him, expression thoughtful. Most of the red was gone, and Luca could breathe again. “Was it a mistake to only drink from Sam?” He hated that idea, that Sam’s blood wouldn’t be enough.
“I don’t believe that would have mattered. You are nearly one hundred. As a human, you would not have lived this long.”
Luca swallowed hard. He’d always known his transition was inevitable. “I never thought it would just take over…”
“Death is always a transition, and rarely an expected one.” Max got up, watching Luca closely before finally moving to the other side of the couch. “Perhaps you should speak to your lovers.”
Luca understood. It was coming, and Max gave him a little time. Maybe to prepare them? He could work with that. Luca nodded, getting up, testing his limbs for the pain. Everything felt mostly normal. How long would that last? A few hours? Days? Weeks? “Thank you.”
“You are loved, Luca. By your men, by Rou and his family, and by myself. Don’t forget that, even when the red rises. The change can be terrifying, or easy. If I could make it easy for you, I would.”
“Even though you never wanted me to be a vampire.” Luca’s heart ached. He couldn’t recall ever hearing Max, his father, say such a thing. Tears clouded his vision again, and he sniffed, trying to hold himself together.
“Even though. Had you not been born dhampir, I’d have steered you away from this life. You would have had mortal lovers, perhaps children, and lived a full and mostly normal mortal existence away from the dark dredges of all that vampirism is.”
“You really hate being a vampire?”
“I don’t. You have had siblings who have. I’ve put down more than my fair share of children. And do much to avoid begetting more.”
Which was why most of Max’s lovers now were male. That made sense. Luca frowned. “Am I the last of your children?”
“The last human one,” Max said.
Luca let that sink in. “Will you hate me when I change?”
“No. Why would I?”
“I know I have brothers but know nothing about them or your interaction with them.”
“We are not at odds.”
That was a strange answer. They weren’t enemies, but not friends either. If Luca was mortal, would he have known they existed? Or Max? And Luca wouldn’t have Sam or Con, or a million experiences that made him who he was. Luca resolved to talk with them tonight about his transition. He didn’t know how to prepare, but together they’d make plans, figure it out. It was how they worked. “Have you had other children who were born part vampire like me?”
“Not really. Cassius had some vampire traits, but his mortal life was short, and he sought vampirism. He changed in his early twenties by another vampire. I don’t know if he would have changed on his own. Most of my children were mortal.”