Page 10 of Traitor

I turn away and remind myself to apologize. Later. I definitely don’t want to do it in front of the woman determined to make a scene. I don’t want to do it at all and have already made my mind up I want to spend as little time with Ford as possible.

He’s too big. Too intimidating. Too…dangerous.

I may be trying to get back out in the world and test my limits, but Ford isn’t a test I’m willing to take.

“You should be grateful I’m even willing to do business here,” I hear the woman say over my shoulder as I reach the top of the stairs. “Considering your reputation,” she adds before gliding out the door.

My head turns involuntarily, curiosity overwhelming common sense, but Ford isn’t behind the desk or anywhere in sight from my vantage point. Shaking my head, I insert the key into the slot and step into my room.

It takes a moment for me to realize I’m surrounded by shadows and my heart thuds in my chest. Frozen by fear in the entryway, I almost can’t force myself to take another step inside. Only by telling myself there’s nothing to be afraid of am I able to take the remaining steps forward.

I dump my backpack on the chair by the dresser and click on a lamp to dispel the darkness. I thought I’d left it on before my trek, but I must have forgotten. Not like me, considering in addition to my other phobias, I have an intense fear of the dark, especially being trapped in dark places.

Striding to the bathroom to confront whatever ghosts may lurk, I tell myself to stop being silly. It’s a new place and that’s why I feel unsettled. I repeat the affirmations given to me by my therapist and start the hot water running for the bath.

When I order dinner a few minutes later, I ask for the whole bottle of wine.