Page 44 of Tortured Souls

I told you so!

No, they are fucking with us. They have to be. Sky wouldn’t do this to me. Not after everything we’ve done and said to one another. I’m her treasure. She just said this earlier today. No. No, no, no. This is not true. I refuse to believe it. Not my girl.

Not my tesoro.

“Do you believe them?” Finn whispers in my ear, as the pair of us stare at Sky’s back as she continues standing in front of the men in a rage. Every ounce of my being wants to believe this is all a lie. She wouldn’t hurt me like this. She promised.

My mind races through every encounter we’ve ever had since she arrived here. From the moment we first spoke in the club, to the constant teasing back and forth, to the most recent memories of being deep inside her. I’ve been watching her this whole time. Not one phone call or shred of evidence can back up these claims. She’s been clean thus far. I have nothing in my arsenal of videos that could even remotely point to her being a snitch.

With all this, why do I feel this pit growing heavier and heavier inside my gut? I need someone to tell me what to do. I need my father and his advice. I need someone else to be the leader right now because my fucking heart is being suffocated by the weight I’m carrying.

Most men don’t ever admit when they want to cry. However, at this moment, I feel I could do just that. The mountain of responsibility that’s plagued me since my father’s passing is finally reached its peak. I can no longer bear it. I need to shut this down. I need to shut all of this down. My head can no longer decipher these overwhelming feelings. I’m spiraling, and the only way I know how to make this all stop is to turn it all off. Flip the switch and slam the door on my heart. No longer allow emotions to run my actions.

I reach for the switch, the end all for my newly found heart. The moment I touch it, I hear a voice in the depth of my psyche, a woman’s. The faintest sounds of my mother telling me to stop. But I don’t. I flip the switch and everything inside me goes black. Suddenly, it’s cold, my insides dipping beneath the icy confines of my shell. This is the only way I know how to handle this. Consequences be damned.

SKYLAR

Rising to my feet, I grip the pliers in my hand and swing with all my strength, connecting with the side of Diego’s head. Instantly, he slumps over in his chair. My heart is pounding. My blood is burning in my veins as my anger reaches a new level. How dare he make me seem like a snitch? How dare he imply I have the capacity to do anything that would benefit my father? I hate him. I hate him with every ounce of my soul. I wish he were dead. He will be very fucking soon. I promise myself that.

“Please tell me he’s fucking lying.” My stomach drops at Saxon’s words. The blood that was once burning with rage nowruns cold. Cold with fear that Saxon could possibly believe a single word that comes from his slimy mouth. Turning to face him, I see Finn is standing beside him. I hadn’t even noticed he’d moved from the back table. Both men are standing bone straight with looks in their eyes that could make the devil shrink. They can’t possibly believe him.

“Are you seriously asking me that?”

“Answer the question,” Finn barks out, but before I can defend myself, Leonard beats me to it.

“She was sent here to spy on you and your club. She was told to pretend she was running from her father, seeking refuge and told to get close to you. Seems like she succeeded, and not with just anyone but the president of the Kings himself.” A sadistic laugh flows past his lips as he gives me a grin full of malicious intent. Lifting the pliers, I go to hit him, but a strong hand wraps around my wrist, stopping me.

Saxon looks down at me, fury, rage, and hurt filling his eyes as he clenches his jaw so tight, I fear he’ll break a tooth.

“Saxon, you know me. I would never do that,” I plead with him, but his eyes only harden as he squeezes my wrist painfully.

“Saxon, you’re hurting me.” Obsidian eyes stare down at me, a shift in his soul happening in the blink of an eye. A transformation from the man I’ve grown to know to this being who’s showing no sign of the man I’ve rapidly been falling for.

“Please tell me what they’re saying is nothing but a ploy to save themselves?” My chest is squeezing so tight, my ribs feel as though they’re splintering and piercing every organ beneath them.

He believes them.

He believes them over me.

With everything we’ve been through recently, he’s taking the word of the two men who obey my father’s every command. His puppets that helped make my life a living nightmare.

I drop the pliers, the loud clanking of the metal connecting with the concrete making me flinch. I can’t look at him anymore. His eyes burn me from the outside in. I lower my head, the pain starting to consume me. Feeling the betrayal of yet another man crumples the last bit of my heart that remains.

How could he believe them?

How could I let this happen to me again? I should have known. No man would ever desire me. No man would ever be on my side. They’re all the same. Every man in my life is the same, and nothing is more important to them than their clubs.

“It would make sense why these two kept coming back to the club just to watch her. Maybe they were checking in on her and making sure she was following through with her orders. Without having to leave a paper trail or a digital footprint with calling or messaging her.” Finn says from beside Saxon, making Sax’s jaw clench even harder.

“Are you not even going to deny it? Please say something to refute what they’re saying. Tell me all this is a lie and what we’ve been doing is real. Tell me, tesoro. I need to hear you say it out loud. I need to know the truth.” Saxon spits his words at me, disgust laced between each word. Even though he’s trying to be hard and every bit of the leader he is, this is a silent plea from him. Every syllable he speaks is a punch to the gut. I want him to just take my word without me having to defend myself. It’s as if their word carries more weight than my own. That’s what’s ripping me apart.

“Answer me, Sky!” I flinch as he yells into my ear, dropping my wrist from his hold.With his outburst, my rage returns in full force. My defense mechanism that protects me from getting hurt. My default when I don’t know how to show anything else. I fall back to my rage because that’s the one emotion I’ve mastered. It’s what’s kept me alive.

“Why should I? It seems like you’re already set on what you believe. You already believe these two over me, right?” I scream louder than I’ve ever screamed before. It’s as if the life has been sucked from my lungs. The pain is becoming so unbearable I suddenly wish he’d just kill me so this will all be finished. I want to cry, but I can’t even produce a single tear. It’s like my body is shutting down and allowing defeat to take hold. Every organ is shutting down, one by one.

I’ve been fighting for so long. When I finally found a man I believed to be different, he just proved to me how truly stupid I really am. No man ever believes me first. It’s always a man’s word over a woman’s, no matter how close you are. The termit’s a man’s worldis laughing at me, proving to me that I’m nothing, even here with this club. I was nothing in the Hellstorms, and I am nothing to the Kings. A man’s world, a place I don’t belong. I guess that’s why I always work better alone. Where I belong.

Finn grips the nape of my neck and yanks me back against his chest so I have to look at Saxon in the face. God, he’s so beautiful. I truly thought I could love this man one day. Yet here he stands, holding his gun to my chest as he stares deep into my eyes, searching for something.