Page 25 of Tortured Soul (Soulless #1)

Lola

A lot of things were confusing me.

After admitting that this whole situation was his fault, Carter became surprisingly quiet as Arc checked his already healing wounds, yelled at him and called him a brainless pigeon.

Margaret was unusually quiet too, although she did try to knock him out with the box that fell to the ground while we were fighting.

Arc kept giving me worried glances as Dimitri was fussing over me.

Fussing . My Nephilim hasn’t been one to fuss in a really long time.

“Are you okay?” he asked, inspecting my arms, wiping away the golden blood with a towel and warm water.

“I’m fine,” I said, unsuccessfully trying to pull my arm away.

And I was. For some reason, Carter didn’t even try to fight back.

“You’re not. There are bruises on your wrists.”

I winced, looking at the slightly purple handprints on my skin. The spots felt tender to the touch, but I knew from experience that these kinds of marks would disappear within a couple of hours.

“Have you seen him ? I mean, if someone deserves to be fussed over, it’s the one who’s bleeding out.”

Dimitri groaned and pulled me to him, sitting me on his lap as he looked over the bruises carefully.

“I’ve been here for a few hours, and I already know that he tried to beat you up when you first arrived and that he’s been pestering the Guardians to send you away. He can bleed out, I don’t care.”

My eyes studied his face then. The crease between his brows. The hard line of his jaw. The way the red of his eyes seemed alive and swirled angrily as his gaze drifted from my bruised wrists to Carter.

The dark circles under his eyes .

Everytime we reunited, it was like meeting him again for the first time.

“What happened?” he asked, his voice softer as his eyes met mine. “You’re not usually prompt to violence. Did he try—”

He interrupted himself, clenching his jaw and gritting his teeth. His arms circled me to cradle me against his chest. It felt like he was reassuring himself that I was here. That I was alright.

“Please, tell me he didn’t—”

“He didn’t.” I shook my head, locking our eyes. He was so tall that even sitting on his lap, I had to look up. “He was just being an asshole.”

He let out an anxious breath, glancing toward Carter and Arc.

“You’re not the type to get mad easily. There’s something you’re not saying.”

He was right. There were very few things that made me lose my shit. Someone calling him an abomination for being born the way he was and falling to a curse he could do nothing against was definitely one of them.

“He insulted you,” I whispered, barely louder than a breath, and choosing not to say the exact word Carter used. “You know I tend to overreact when it comes to you.”

Dimitri’s face softened as his hand came up to pinch my chin, making sure I could see all the extent of his affection toward me in his gaze, his whole face.

“Be careful, zhizn moya , or I might believe you still care about me. About us .”

The corner of his lips tilted upward almost imperceptibly before setting back on a serious line. I ignored the fluttering in my belly at the Russian words he often called me.

“You know I do. You know I always will.”

The little smile he gave me next was forced.

“In a platonic way, right? Because now you’re with that guy,” he said, tilting his head toward Arc who was staring at us from his spot next to Carter.

I groaned. “I’m not with him.”

Dimitri took my hand. The hand that was now marked with the dark bronze intricate lines made of Arc and mine’s blood, sealing our binding promise.

“Then what’s this? ”

“Obviously not what you think it is,” I answered, pulling my hand away in embarrassment.

“Is he not your mate?” he asked, tilting his head to the side and placing his hands back on my back and hips. “The Divine dryan , too?”

I rolled my eyes. Dimitri liked to use many languages at the same time, but he was particularly fond of Russian, where we both lived for a while. Divine trash was quite fitting when it came to Carter. I still loved how his accent changed whenever he switched tongues.

“You just got here. How do you know about that?”

“As I told you, I’ve heard a lot in the few hours I spent here. Seems the population of this city is quite fond of gossip.”

Tell me about it.

I exhaled in defeat.

“It doesn’t matter if they’re my mates. No soul, remember? I can’t bind.”

His eyes dropped to my lips as his hand settled on my thigh, holding me close to him.

“It might stop you from binding, but it didn’t stop me from loving you. Didn’t stop Blake either.”

I tensed against him and my breath stuttered. He must have noticed as he stilled too, his thumb not rubbing circles on my hip anymore. His eyes fell to the chain falling against my chest, disappearing under my dress, where he knew the ring was still hanging.

“I—I’m sorry,” he blurted. “I didn’t mean to mention him by name.”

My throat bobbed as I struggled to swallow through the knot that had formed there.

“Is he…Do you know if he’s still…”

“He is.” He nodded, his eyes filled with pain. “I’ve done as you asked. I made sure to check on him at least every year.”

Good. That was good. It meant that me leaving him hadn’t been for nothing. It meant that breaking his heart and mine had been worth it as it actually saved his life and kept him safe.

“What I meant to say was that even though we’re unable to bind with you, we can still feel that you’re ours. That our souls belong to you, even though you don’t have yours.”

It was painful. So painful to hear him say things like this, after we spent over fifteen hundred years fighting about it. I knew Dimitri was never actually angry with me, that when we fought again and again about me selling my soul, it was the madness taking over that was talking.

But even though I knew it, it still confused the hell out of me. That one day he could call me zhizn moya , and the next blaming me for losing his mind and disappearing for years. Decades .

And yet, I still loved him. I still cared. I still wanted to protect him or kill for him.

“Arc seems like a decent guy,” Dimitri said after a few minutes of silence. “I could feel he didn’t trust me, but he still asked questions about me. About us, and how we knew each other.”

“What did he ask?”

He grinned, and the action made me narrow my eyes at him in suspicion.

“I didn’t give him many answers, if that’s what you’re worried about. He suspects that I’m your mate too, though. Which probably worries him since, you know”—he pointed at his hair and eyes—“the madness and all?”

“Yeah,” I groaned. “I had this talk with Carrie when you guys left her office.”

A talk that I had to think about later on. After all, she did bring light to the fact that my soul shouldn’t have been taken away from me…

But it was better not to talk about it with Dimitri now. Not before I knew more. Not before I knew if I could actually get it back. The last thing I wanted was to lead him on or get his hopes up for nothing.

“Dimitri, I—”

“I’m sorry.”

Both our heads turned toward the voice. Carter had his arms crossed over his chest, head down, eyes on the floor in front of him.

I couldn’t help but frown. Something was up .

“Sorry?” I asked, unsure I heard him right.

“For what I said.”

“You’re sorry,” I repeated slowly.

“I am.”

Unbelievable.

“I’d be speechless if I believed you.”

Carter groaned, turning his face toward Arc, his whole body tensing. Arc’s eyes were stuck on where Dimitri’s hands were. My hips. My thighs.

“I’m impressed, though,” I said with a dramatic sigh. “You did swallow your pride.”

Carter took a menacing step forward. Dimitri tensed under me, ready to step between us as Arc cursed, grabbing the angel’s shoulder firmly.

“Enough,” he said, the smell of embers filling the space. “Carter, go change. You’re bloody and your damn shirt is shredded. When you come back you’ll be the one officiating the binding ceremony.”

He obeyed, leaving the archives angrily, slamming the door behind him. If Margaret was anywhere around, she’ll definitely get back at him for all the rumble he’d caused in here today…

“Still a pro at pissing people off, I see.” Dimitri chuckled in my ear.

“You have no idea,” Arc muttered, stepping closer to us, sliding his hands in his pockets.

I didn’t notice until now but that man cleaned up nice . A fully black suit, no tie, and the three top buttons of his shirt undone…I understood the choice to not wear a jacket, though. It was way too hot for that.

His usually kind of messy hair was pulled back, only a strand falling over his forehead.

“Sorry we were late,” he said, sitting on the armchair facing ours. “Your friend’s paperwork took some time.”

Dimitri groaned in my back.

These guys needed to chill. What was it with all the growling and grunting?

“Would have been quicker if you didn’t ask so many pointless questions.”

Arc scoffed.

“They were not pointless . Anyway, you’re all set. Feel free to stay at the party or find Aymeric so he can take you back to the apartment.”

I tried to stand up from Dimitri’s lap but he held on to me, keeping me against his chest.

“What do you mean, find Aymeric?” I asked. “I can take him there.”

Arc tilted his head to the side, a mischievous smile growing on his face .

“Did you forget that you’re moving to my place?”

Uhuh, not happening.

“I never agreed to that.”

He lifted his hand, showing the dark bronze intricate lines mirroring mines.

“You did, blondie. If I remember correctly, my exact words were, ‘ No matter what happens, we’ll share a bed at night if we’re physically able to .’ The stone you placed at your window prevents anyone, including me, from entering your room and sharing your bed.”

“Come on, I can obviously remove the stone,” I complained.

Arc shook his head, his expression satisfied. “Even if you remove it, the spell will take time to dissipate. A few days, at least, if not more.”

“You can’t be serious,” I insisted, slapping both my hands on my face to muffle a groan.

“I feel compelled to inform you that blonde is not her natural color,” Dimitri muttered from behind me.

“ Not the point ,” I said in my hands.

“Maybe not, but good to know,” Arc mused, a thoughtful look on his face. “Alright, let’s go.”

He stood, placing his hand in front of me to take. I crossed my arms over my chest, keeping my ass on Dimitri’s lap.

“I’m not going.”

He cocked his brow, his head tilting slightly.

“Are you saying you’re breaking our binding promise?”

My eyes drifted to Dimitri who was unusually quiet. He shrugged apologetically.

“I’m not leaving Dimitri on his own for his first night here,” I said finally.

I felt bad for using him as a buffer between Arc and me. Not too bad, but a little.

“If that’s the issue, there are empty rooms at my place, it’s no trouble,” Arc said. Why did he have to be so persistent?

My eyes widened and I turned back toward my former lover, whose gaze was pointedly avoiding mine.

“Breaking a binding promise is known to be extremely painful,” he simply stated, looking at the floor.

“I’m not breaking the promise, I’m just saying it doesn’t have to be— Arc ! Let me down! ”

I yelped as I was thrown over a shoulder, my eyes now facing a broad back. Arc’s arm held onto my thighs, preventing my dress from going up my ass and flashing anyone we might pass.

“Are you coming or heading back to the party?” he asked.

“I’ll come with you,” Dimitri said, standing up to walk behind him.

“Let. Me. Down!” I hissed, punching at his back with my ineffective strength. “You’re breaking the promise! You swore you wouldn’t touch me!”

“I swore not to touch you inappropriately. Nothing inappropriate here, and since you won’t listen to your reason…”

Everyone stared as we crossed the main hall. Some eyes were envious. Most faces were curious. All mouths were gaping.

“People will be talking,” I muttered as he walked down the stairs of the entrance.

“Let them. You might not want to acknowledge it, but you’re my mate, and everyone already knows.”

Oh, I acknowledged it alright. I just didn’t know until a few hours ago…

And it looked like Carrie didn’t tell him about my missing soul and the whole reason why he might have thought I was just ignoring our mating link…